I'll try my best to answer questions to the best of my ability. If I don't know the answer to your question, then I'll reasearch it or direct you to a columnist who can help you more. I really hope that I can help you with anything you might need assistance with. Feel free to email me with any questions, I'm glad to help with follow-up questions. I hope that I can ease your mind and help you through any sticky spots you might be in.
E-mail: peachy-keen@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: Toronto
Occupation: Student
Age: 17
Yahoo: moose_juice26
Member Since: April 11, 2005
Answers: 187
Last Update: June 29, 2008
Visitors: 11554
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kooka-burra
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I am seventeen and I met my best friend from doing plays together, we have alot in common, like we both like to sing and act. I have always liked my best friend as a brother but I am starting to develop feelings for him. He has always been feminine and people call him gay but I trust him when he says he's not. The problem is that everytime we get drunk he wants my brother. When he was drunk I asked him if he was gay and he said he wasnt and that he did like me but he liked my brother. I told him that I didnt understand that he wasnt gay and he started crying and said that he just wanted my brother when he is drinking and that is it and that he really does like me. He knows what he said and when he is sober he regrets saying it and still says he isnt gay. Because he is my best friend I am trying so hard to believe him but I dont know, he has to be gay. I dont know what to think but I dont want to continue are relationship if he is and I really dont want to loose him as a friend. I will still be his friend if he is gay but no his girlfriend, it doesnt change anything I mean I have other gay friends and I am ok with it. I dont even know what to think. What should I do? (link)
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I am assuming that your friend is about 17, as well. At this age, it can be very confusing for many people as to thier sexual orientation. Especially when you are a boy involved in an industry that has become synonomous with homosexuality. It is possible that he is bisexual and struggling with this. It is also possible that he is gay and having a hard time coming to terms with this. It is also possible that he is straight and just confused. Right now, I think the best thing you can do for him is to just be supportive. I know you may have feelings for him, but you may have to put those aside for now. Try not to put too much pressure on him and just let him know that you are going to supportive no matter what. I'm sorry that I can't give you a more simple answer, but, as I'm sure you know, these things are never black and white. I'm glad that you are openminded. That will be a quality that will be invaluable to your friend as he tries to work out his sexuality. Hope I helped.
Love, Rainbow
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If you shave your vagina
is it better to use cold or hot or warm water?
thank s (link)
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I would use warm water, it tends to make the hair and skin softer and less susceptible to irritation. If you are going to shave, i would suggest some sort of shaving cream, it helps to prevent irritation, also.
Love, Rainbow
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Firstly sorry about the subject i didnt know where to put it.
My hair gets greasy so so so fast! I wash it in the morning and by the evening its greasy
I have to wash it everyday and its really annoying me.
What can i do so that i only have to wash it every 2 days or something?
any products i can use? (link)
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I used to have that problem and as weird as it seems what helped me was not washing it as often. Using shampoo and other products can strip your hair of its natural oils and then your scalp tried to replace all of them at one time. They build up and cause greasy hair. When I stared washing my hair only once every 2 days my hair eventually balanced out and became normal. Your hair will be greasy for a while, but after the initial couple of days it should balance out. There are also products designed specifically for greasy hair. You can ask a beauty specialist or ask somebody who works where you buy your shampoo what is best for greasy hair. Hope I helped. Good Luck.
Love, rainbow
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my family keeps asking me if i am depressed what should i do to show them that truthfully i am not? its really bugging me for once i am not depressed! (link)
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Try to remember that they are only doing this because they love you and they want you to be happy. You said that for once you are not depressed? If that means that you once were depressed then you should know that depression can come in waves. You can feel great right now and then really depressed later. I think the best way to deal with your problem is to tell them straight out what you're feeling. You should say something like, "Listen, I'm really not depressed. I am actually feeling really good lately and you constantly asking me if I'm depressed is making feel bad. If I do feel depressed, I'll tell you, but for now I'm not and I would appreciate it if you would stop asking me about it." Tell them that you know they are asking out of love & concern. They will probably feel reassured if you tell them that you will let them know if you are feeling depressed. I hope I've helped somewhat. Good Luck.
Love, Rainbow
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Why do many non-Christians celebrate Christmas? Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Jesus, so I just don't understand how anyone who doesn't believe in Jesus could celebrate his birth just for presents. And why do nonreligious people have to celebrate Christmas? Why not Hannukah or Kwanza?
Also, why do people who only celebrate Christmas and Easter consider themselves Christian? (people who don't pray or go to church, but still celebrate Christian holidays) (link)
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You have to realize that Christmas, for most people, has lost all religious meaning. For many people, Christmas is more of a family tradition than the celebration of the birth of Christ. Christmas is a time for many to get together with family members that they haven't seen in a while and be with them. Also, the entire spirt of Christmas (peace on earth and goodwill towards men, etc.) is something that everybody wishes could be real all the time. Some people celebrate Christmas because their parents were Christians and it has become a tradition for them, it also brings back good childhood memories. Try not to judge people too harshly, everywhere you turn Christmas is being commercialized. Its hard not to buy into it, when everybody else is. If you aren't Christian, you are still exprected to buy gifts for everybody you know and you are given gifts, even if you don't want any. Also, many children that are in non-christian families pressure their parents to celebrate Christmas and buy them gifts because they see their friends doing it and they see all the toy commercials on television.
When non-christians celebrate Christmas, the reason why they do so as opposed to celebrating another winter holiday may have something to do with family tradition, etc. It it also due to the sheer popularity of Christmas as opposed to other holidays. Christmas is pushed on us from every direction. I mean, when was the last time you saw Channakah specials on television?
Some people do not feel the need to go to church to worship god. They feel that they can show god thier devotion through their everyday life and home worship. Others, were simply raised Christian and consider themselves Christian at heart, or with Christian values.
There you have it (basically). There are obviously many more complexities to the issue. Commercialization has a lot to do with it, though. I hope I answered your question.
Love, Rainbow
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I usually have a clear clomplexion but this morning i woke up and i had a huge pimple right in the middle of my forehead. It feels like it's a knot and it hurts sooo bad! How can I get it not to be sooo swollen and to clear up really fast I have a date tomorrow! (link)
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I use toothpaste, the white kind (the gell kind doesn't work). Toothpaste dries zits right up, make sure that you leave it on for a long time (overnight is preferable). If the pimple has come to a head (it has a white middle) you can take a hot shower and try to pop it. The steam from the hot shower opens your pores and makes it easier to pop. Also, maike sure to wash your face regularly and make sure to take off makeup. If its still there after using toothpaste (it will be brought down A LOT) then you can use some coverup to lessen redness. Don't overdo it, though because if you use too much makeup on a blemish then it only ends up drawing attention to your flaws. Hope I helped and have a good time on your date.
Love, Rainbow
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is it true [[well i heard - could be just one of those stupid fitness rumors. lol]] that if you drank 8 glasses of water a day you could really lose weight? if so, how much? dont worry im not going on any of those crash diets.
thank you =] (link)
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In a way it is true. Water on its own does not make you lose weight, but it means that you will be drinking less juice and soda, etc. It also means that you will be more full more of the time and so you will not eat as much. It also helps your digestive system keep going. Many people also have improves complexions when they drink lots of water. Water is VERY good for you. Don't rely on water alone for weight loss, you shold also eat properly and exercise reguylarly. Drinking 8 glasses of water a day is an extremely healthy think to do. More people should be drinking 8 glasses a day. I would do it if I were you. Good luck.
Love, Rainbow
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k this is wierd
i dont use tampons and i want to ask how do you go to the bathroom when you wear tampons
do you take it out and have to put it back again (link)
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No, you are perfectly capable of peeing with a tampon in. Your pee comes out of your urethra, its a differnt hole than your vagina. The tampon goes in your vagina, you do not pee out of your vagina. Hope that clears it all up for you.
Love, Rainbow
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Okay, well I'm 14/f and I'm using pads and I hate it since a)it's really noticable to carry around b)it's very annoying c)it's disgusting to take care of.
Well, I want to use tampons. And i have some questions on it(only for people who have used tampons and pads..or just tampons):
1. Is there a chance of it leaking (like frequently so that your undies are stained with blood)
2. How often is there a chance of it getting stuck (like the string used to pull it out snapping before you can pull it out)
3. Is it much cleaner and easier to use than pads?
4. What brand is the best?
Also, I don't know how to tell my mom that I want to use tampons instead of pads.
(link)
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1. your tampon will only leak if you leave it in for too long. After a while you will begin to know how long YOU need to keep your tampon in for your flow. DO NOT leave a tampon in for more than 8 hours. Usually they won't leak, though. If you are uncomfortable you can wear a pantyliner underneath incase of leakage until you get used to tampons.
2. The string is sewn in and I have actually tried to break it off with my hands and it is almost impossible.
3. Yes, your vagina does not have extra menstrual fluid, you can flush your tampons (or throw them away if you like) and they are much more comfortable. You can't even feel it, usually.
4. Personally, I like tampx compak the best, but everybody is different. I like tampax compak because they are comfortable and small (so people can't find them in my purse). Some people prefer plastic applicators, some prefer cardbord. You can try a few different brands if you want.
As for telling your mom, if she uses tampons she should understand. Even if she doesn't, give her some reasons why you want to use tampons. The reasons that you gave for not wanting to use pads are perfectly valid. You can also add, that they are uncomfortable and hard to do active things in (if you play sports, dance or even take gym in school then tampons will make it easier to do those things comfortably). If you don't know how to approach her you can either wait until it comes up or just pick a moment when you two are alone and tell her that you would like to try using tampons instead of pads. you may think that its embarrassing, but you'd be surprised how understanding moms can be. Good Luck and I hope I helped.
Love, Rainbow
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Since yesterday morning i have been sneezing. Ive probly sneezed over 120times. Its drving me insane. Its like after i sneeze them inside of my nose starts itching then i sneeze and then all over again. Ive never had allergy problems so i dont understand why im sneezing so much.
Im being serious so dont take me as one of those stupid that ask stupid questions..
thank you (link)
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People can develop allergies later in life. See if anything is different in your life (in terms of detergent, flowers, perfume, food, excess of dust, etc.). Try benadryl, if it works you know its an allergy and you can go to an allergist to help determine exactly what you are allergic to. Other signs of allergies are:
- itchy eyes
- watery eyes/nose
- runny nose
- general itchyness
- hives (patches of extremely itchy rashes)
- red eyes
- wheezing/difficulty breathing
- stomach cramps
- vomiting
- diarreah
- headaches
If you get these symptoms in addition to your sneezing than there is a good chance that it is allergies.
There is also a chance that it could just be an irritant in the air.
Love, Rainbow
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okay, our school puts on a halloween haunt concert every year. I already have a gorgeous dress that I need to make use of, I just don't know how to incorporate it into a costume. Can you give me ideas on what I could dress up as using ths dress? Please, nothing like throwing fake blood or getting the dress dirty. Also I want to look pretty, not some sort of monster.
http://img116.imageshack.us/img116/9646/picturefa5.jpg (link)
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You could be a bride (maybe), or an angel (wings, halo, etc.), or fairy princess (glitter on your face, particularly near your eyes. Wings, pretty hair, etc.), you could be Miss Teen [Your school/town here]. To makie a sash you could take some extra white or pink fabric and use a magic marker to write the title on it in pretty cursive, tiara, heels, nice makeup, etc. You could be Marilyn Monroe (heels, red lips, black eyeliner and mascara, done up hair if you're blonde or possibly a nice wig, the pearls in the picture, a fake fur stole/boa, old hollywood stuff). I like Marilyn Monroe/hollywood startlet best, myself. It'll give you an excuse to get all glamed up. Hope I helped, have a great halloween!
Love, Rainbow
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I'm 19 and married..I have been with my husband since I was 15--and he is the only person that I have ever had sex with. Recently there has been this really dark little blister like thing develop near my vagina. What is it? (link)
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You should really see your Gynocologist and if you don't have one, I reccomend that you get one. Even if it is nothing to worry about having a Gyno is just a good idea. Don't feel embarrassed, they see many women everyday and treat you very professionally. This is their job and they will make sure that you feel as comfortable as you can. No one here (even if they are professionals) will be able to tell you for sure what it is without actually seeing it. Good Luck.
Love, Rainbow
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ok i have a question. I heard if you dont get ur cherry popped during sex then you cant have kids. Is that true? And another thing. I also heard if you dont get ur cherry popped you are still a virgin. Is that true? (link)
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If you don't get your "cherry popped" during sex, you can still have kids. Also, if a penis enters your vagina you are no longer a virgin, whether your hymen breaks (cherry pops) or not is irrelevant. If your cherry pops and you you have not had vaginal sex then you are still a virgin, the breaking of the hymen does not affect your virgin status or your ability to have children.
Love, Rainbow
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I have an extremely bad toothache. Like i want to cry thats how bad it hurts. I told my mom and she said it will feel better in a couple days and that was 2 days ago and i feel 50% worse now. I hate dentist but it hurts so bad im willing to let them do whatever they have to to make this feel better. But i cant get to one because of my parents. Is there anything out there i can buy that will help me feel better? Ive tried oragel and tylenol but nothing has worked.
thank you. By the way is my wisdom tooth or whatever tooth is in the back.
(link)
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I agree with elipongo, you MUST go to a dentist. Please tell you parents that you need a dentist, if they won't listen arrange it yourself by getting others involved. Oral health affects almost every other part of your body. Oral health is vital to your overall health. You MUST get to a dentist asap. To reduce the pain, gargling with salt water will partially numb and disinfect for a short period of time, its a quick fix until you can see a dentist. Please see a doctor soon.
Love, Rainbow
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I have a bad vaginal odor ..i've already been to a doctor and they said I do not have any infections, and to just continue to wash properly and yada yada yada...however, I wash myself daily and have no idea what is causing this. Does anyone know of any way to get rid of this horrible odor??? (link)
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If it really is as bad as you say, you can use baby wipes as someone suggested, there are a lot of products available at pharmacys for vaginal odour. Elexa makes freshening wipes, Contine to wash, but do not go crazy with it. Your vagina is a self-cleansing organ, when you over-wash it dries out the tissue, so your vagina tries to lubricate itself by adding a lot of juices. The vaginal tissues are very sensitive, so if you MUST use soap be sure to use a mild, unscented soap (ivory soap is good). Be sure to change your underwear regularly and wipe yourself properly (front to back and not the other way around) and fairly thoroughly (not to the point of chafing or dying, though). Ketting your vagina air out and go au natural if you can might be good for you. If you get really worried, you can always go to a gyno (I don't know if you already have, but you should consider it if you haven't).
Love, Rainbow
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what is one of the best workouts so that when i wear jeans my fat doesnt stick out ? lol i know that sounds kinda weird. but thanks! (link)
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if you want to lose body fat, cardio excersizes such as jogging/running, jumping jacks, etc are the best for that. Things like pushups, crunches, etc. cause you to gain muscle. Once you loose the ampount of body fat that you want, you can do some crunches (there are lots of different types, ask me if you want me to explain to you) to tighten your abdominal area. Good luck.
Love, Rainbow
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ok to start i have an acoustic guitar and i love jack johnson at the moment i would love to write my own (first) song or somthing the thing is i have no idea how to start or go about about it i was thinkin get a tune up an runnin or sumin then put lyrics to it later but i cant quite get the tune i have been playin since i was 5 i am 15 now.
so keeping in mind i am an experirienced player but with limmited talent (welll ime not that bad but you get the picture, heh)
also how should the song be laid out it is somthing like
intro
verse
chorus
verse
chorus
verse
outro
that is right isnt it? if not please correct thanks. (link)
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everybody does it differently, I write tend to write the lyrics and then the music...sometimes I'll write a tune and it'll inspire lyrics in me. I usually structure my songs:
intro
verse 1
chorus
verse 2
bridge
chorus
verse 3
outro
Sometimes, its completely different, though. The structure you said is a structure that most people start with. I started with that. Its easier to switch around the format and get creative once you have had some practise. Remember that you don't have to strucure a song according to anyone's standards. Its YOUR song, YOUR expression of creativity, so you should write it whatever way YOU want. An interesting song is a creative and original one, go with your insincts and inspiration and it'll be good. Hope I helped.
Love, Rainbow
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I have dyed dark brown hair thats a little past my shoulders and is super thick. (which i hate)
What are some websites that have just pictures of really punk/scene/emo hairstyles? You know edgy stuff. I don't really wanna change my hair that much since its so damaged from bleach and other crap. But I can flex on the legnth.
Thanks! (link)
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You should do something "you", but here are some pictures...
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v697/punk-rebel26/friend%20photos/DSC01704.jpg
- the girl in the front (with the pink hair) has long sideswept bangs in the front with short spiky layers in the back, the girl in the back has short hair with longer layers in the front and shorter hair in the back (it looks especially good if its darker brown with hilights)
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v697/punk-rebel26/1113650641_m.jpg
- this girl has layers and has teased her roots and blow dried them upside down, this makes her hair have lots of volume (thats a good idea with any short hairstyle as well)
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v697/punk-rebel26/1052992614_m.jpg
- long layers, sideswept bangs. It looks better with straightend hair, but you have doo it with wavy hair.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v697/punk-rebel26/1176547403_m.jpg
- log-ish bangs, short layers with teased roots. Hair down to at least the jaw line.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v697/punk-rebel26/blondebrody3sn.jpg
- long bangs, lots of messy layers. Probably lots of loose styling product used.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v697/punk-rebel26/short_easy_hair_styles_02.jpg
- long layers, asymetrical (one side longer than the other)
General advice, if you hate having thick hair then layers are a good option for you, especially since they tend to look very choppy and edgy if done properly. If you don't like any of the hairstyles that you are given, you can always google hairsyles. There are lots of sites with pictures of hairstyles. You can also google a celebrity that you like the style of and see if anything about their hair appeals to you. Myspace or faceboook (anywhere where you can see pictures of real people with their hair) are also a good place. Once you find a network of people who are "punk/emo" they all tend to have hair that you could be looking for. Hope I helped and if you still don't know what you want, you can ask a hairdresser for suggestions, they tend to know what looks good on your face shape and hair type. Good Luck.
Love, Rainbow
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ok so my girl said that she was on the pill so we had sex and i came inside of her, but then she told me she had been nin the sominican republic and been off the pill, so now we're real worried that she might get pregnent. now i came inside of her, but she was on the pill before that and she has both highly heavy and irregular periods. so im hoping that cut the chances of pregnancy down, is there anything else we can do to cut down the chances of pregnancy. and please no lectures. just help. we're real scared (link)
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This is an extremely scary situation to be in, for both of you, I know. There are some symptoms that she should look for they include:
-Naseua/vomiting
-Sore,tender or swollen breasts
-Fatigue
-Frequent urination
-Mood swings
You should also both go to see a doctor and have them administer a pregnancy test. You can also get a home pregnancy if you do not want to see a doctor.
As for cutting down chances of pregnancy, some places sell a "morning after pill" this will rid her womb of any fertilized egg that could be there. She can only take the pill up to 72 hours after having sex. if it has been longer than that, then she can't take it.
Remember that you need each other's support right now. Be there for each other and don't point fingers, blame will help nothing. If you need any more advice then don't hesitate to ask me. I hope everything works out for the best.
Love, Rainbow
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i know this is kinda long, but if you're gay [female or male], please read.
just so you know, i'm 15/f
lately i've been thinking about dating a girl.
i went through a short bi-curious thing in sixth grade [im in highschoool now], but i found this girl. and she's really cute and amazing. and i honestly would date her. i know women are just generally attractive, but i really like her. the thing is i'm willing to try being with a girl. but i would want them to know that i'm not sure with the whole gay thing. the girl i like is bi, but she knows for a fact she is. i think i would enjoy being with a girl emotionally and physically. i'm trying to figure out if this is just a phase or what. i'm confused as hell.
what should i do? (link)
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Many, many girls your age are interested in experementing with dating other girls. Even if they don't admit it. If you like this girl you should give it a shot with her, you should tell her that you are not 100% sure about your sexual orientation yet, but that you really like her. I'm sure that she will have gone through a simmilar experience before she decided that she was bi. She will most likely understand what you are going through and try help you through the confusion. DO NOT refer to her as an experiment!!! That can be offensive. Don't worry about anything that anyone else says, most people who ridicule gay/bi people are trying to cover their own confused sexual feelings. It might just be a phase, but it might be for real. If you enjoy being with this girl then you should be with her. Don't worry everyone is confused and questions their sexual orientation at some point, especially during thier teen years. I know it can be very frustrating and confusing, just remember that you have to face these feelings and you are not alone in any way. I hope I helped. Good Luck.
Love, Rainbow
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