dropkickCathyy's advice column

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Q: i'm best friends with a group of 4 other girls. tonight they are all having a sleepover .. and like i wasnt even invited. they are always bugging me to go out with them, but they never ever tell me about the plans or invite me, they forget or something. i cant stop crying i am always the one left out, i always have been. what should i do?

Talk to all of them, either as a group or one by one. Tell them how you're feeling about being left out and that if hey want you to go out with them then you at least need to be informed on what the plans are. Because you can't be somewhere that you don't even know about, right? In the meantime, I know it's disappointing to feel like you're the odd one out but try to cheer up, please? Don't cry.

Q: anyone like the band sister hazel?

Sister Hazel

Q: What are some bands that sound like Hollywood Undead?

I've noticed that alot of people who like to listen to Hollywood Undead, aside from me, like to listen to:
From First To Last
Chiodos defintely

Q: ok, tonite me and my bf and my bestie and another guy(not her bf) were gonna go to the movies, but my parents said that they had to come to the first couple dates of me and my bf. soo that was fine, but on the way there he keeps calling me asking me what road this theatre is on (i dont know why, everyone goes to this one) soo then he calls me one more time and says oh can i get a ride home with you because my mom doesn\'t wanna drive all the way back to get me. and i asked my mom and she said no because his house was so far away from ours. so he was like well sorry then i can\'t come. (oh yea and earlier before we left for the movie, the guy friend going with us cancelled, which was fine) soo i was like,, well ok i guess. so then it was just me and my best friend, and my brothers and dad. (dad and bros sat away from us) soo basically it was like a waste of 50 dollars, and my parents were really mad. i got chewed out for it, and they said that was my only chance to go so we cant date i guess. ok, so i need advice of what i should do? because like if we cant go out then we may as well not date, theres no point. should i talk to him about it? should i break up with him? help please, i rate!

If you seriously like this guy, then I think you should stay with him. I'm sure there are other ways of the two of you getting to be with eachother other then just the movies. Besides, if you really liked this guy, not being able to see him that much shouldn't really matter. I'm sure that the two of you could work something out, just plan ahead and both of you let your parents kno about your plans, so there won't be any sudden cancellations.

Q: 19 f
ok so me and my boyfriend had sex last night and he went in really deep. im just curious if its normal for a girl to look bloated like the day after

Question:"After intercourse, my stomach feels bloated and hurts like period pain and this can last for 15 minutes."

Answer:"Bloating of the stomach may be due to irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) and this is another possible cause of abdominal symptoms, although this would tend to come on at other times rather than just after sex. "

Q: [15/f] i keep gettin my period really late a lot lately. like i always know when im gonna get it but lately its like way outta wack. is it cause of stress? [i've been getting a lot of shit from my friends lately and there's this huge thing going on between me and my exbf.] plzz plzz help. thnx.

There are a couple of possible reasons on why it's coming later than it usually does. Stress is one of them. Physical and emotional stress can cause it to come later or to even skip. Being overweight can cause your period to be delayed, as can being underweight. Dropping a dramatic amount of weight in a short period of time can do this also. Certain prescription medications may affect it. Birth control pills are one obvious one. Hormones can cause it to be late. Or there could also be a thyroid ot pituary gland problem. But seeing as how you said you've been under alot of stress, it's probably that. But, I just wanted to sound intellegent. =]

Q: This is a weird one... I'm 22 and I've had sex with three guys. Through random luck, all three had larger than average-sized penises. (Going by the average size reported by studies.) The last guy I dated was ridiculous; despite being short and thin in stature, his penis was 7.5 inches long, 6.5 inches in *circumference* - I'm not kidding. Sex was actually a bit painful sometimes!

Anyway, I'm seeing someone at the moment and I have realised I have this really stupid fear - that he's going to be small. It's not that I care in terms of my pleasure (so far he's been pretty good with his hands, if you know what I mean, and I think he'll be good in bed too). But I have no idea what to say if he's small! When I found out how big my exboyfriend was, I gasped and said, "Jesus Christ!"... Is it ok to say nothing if a guy is average or small, or do guys appreciate it if you pretend to be impressed even if you aren't?

Sorry this question is so bizarre, but I'd really appreciate some advice on this topic!

Do not try to act as though you're impressed, you don't need to act. Just don't say anything about it. I mean if he's small, sure you'll be a bit disappointed, who wouldn't? But, if you really like this guy, it won't matter. If he's bad in bed, then just either tell him you want to do other things while in bed so something else can give you what you need and he might even think it's him and the other object is just intensifying it, or just don't have sex too often, but do it every once in a while.

Q: ive had a big crush on my best friend for the longest time. in feb, i told him how i felt about him and he told me that he couldnt commit and would rather just be friends. he kept giving off the wrong ideas to me because thats the way he shows affection, by hugging flirting ect. but he did not like me. basically i kept getting hurt because i kept wanting to believe he did and then got let down. until one day i told him i got over him (not entirely true).

ever since we've become best friends and earlier this month he confessed somthing to me. he told me that he was going through a phase where he wasnt sure of his sexuality, in other words he thought that he was gay. but he said that he realized that he is strait. and he told me that when i told him i liked him, he wasnt sure what to do because really he does care about me but he couldnt see me like that. but now things are so totally different. the only thing keeping us apart is fear, he is afraid or commitment. he said that he cant afford a relationship because well lets just say his first girlfriends broke his heart and his second one was too clingy. and he doesnt want to ruin our friendship i guess.
god if only he knew that i wont be like them.

i really like him and he doesnt even know about it. he really seems to like me too, i think. i mean he always sits next to me, puts his arm around me, grabs my hands and plays with them, hugs me- and then says he wants another hug, waits for me, wants to hang out with me all the time, makes fun of me- by calling me pet names, and the other day i saw him looking at me in class and when i looked at him he turned away.

i gave up all hope on him until he hinted that he might like me but obviously he isnt gonna put his feelings on the line because he thinks that i dont like him. if thats what he really wants i could stand just being friends, its not that bad actually. but i really do like him and well i want to tell him but i dont exactly know how to. do u think that if i threw major hints then he might respond? what are some good hints that he wont miss? seriously i need help on this one. how do i let him know that i will be a great girlfriend and i wont break his heart. how can i make him get over his problems with commitment?
THANK YOU SO MUCH =)

Start flirting with him alot. And seeing as how he knew you used to like him before, your flirting is going to make him realize "Hey, she might like me again." To throw some hints out to him the best way is to do it in a joking manner. Like, "You're cute, we should date." Just joke around with it, always worked for me. And as for his worries about commitment and a painful break-up. There's not really much you can do about that, except to show him tha you're not like his other past girlfriends, listen to him and just be reallly good to him, don't do anything to upset him, and he'll start to trust you about more and if he likes you, he'll see that he could hold a relationship with you because of the fact that you ARE different.

Q: what is that movie called with brad pitt and angelina jolie.. where they are married i think.. and they are spys??
thanks 4 your help!!!
reply soon!!!

Mr. and Mrs. Smith

GREAT movie.

Q: It has come to the point now where, I just can't eat anymore.
For 2 days, I went without eating food. Not to diet, not to starve myself, just because, I wasn't hungry.
Now, I get real hungry, and get something big, [ like a big plate of spaghetti ] and I'll taste it and basically want to throw it up, but I don't.
This has become a problem for me, and I feel anorexic. Whats going on?

This sight has a lot of different possible reasons of why this is happening.

http://www.wrongdiagnosis.com/sym/undereating.htm

Q: sometimes you can download the music on myspace. i always do that , but is it okay?

It's should be fine, I mean, the band put it there and enabled the option to donload the song, while others they don't let you. So pretty much I guess you could consider it the bands permission?

Q: well last week i was having severe pains in my lower abdomain and the school nurse suggested it may be an ovarian cyst. i had been having all the sypmtoms of one for the past couple months, so my mom took me to a normal doctors. but since i was under 18, im 15, my mom had to come in with me. im going to a gyno wensday and its my first time. what im wondering is are all gynos like planned parenthood (everything you tell them is confidental & your parent doesnt have to come in). because i really want to be truthful with them but if my mom found out i was sexually active...yeah. also, what should i do/not do in order to prepare for it. thank you

Well, when I went to my first appointment, she had my mom come in for a minute, but before she began to ask me anything personal about my sex life that I definitely would not want my mom to hear, she asked my mom if she could step out of the room for a minute or so. Then had my mom come back in, and then shut the curtain thing so my mom wouldn't see my goods. Don't think about it too much. =]

Q: there is this girl i like but i have not talked to her in ages. she is having a party and i wsa invited but i dont think she knows i like her. Should i go to the party and what should i do??

I say go to the party. First of all, you were invited, unless you have something important to do that night, it would be rude to turn it down. And seeing as how you haven't spoken to her a long time, it would be a great time to talk to her and if things go well, start flirting with her a bit. Don't just flat out immediatley tell her that you like her that exact night. If she seems like she likes you and flirts back then there's definitely a good chance of getting together. Wait a couple of days to tell her you like her, if you decide to tell her.

Q: 14/f
ive been going out with my boyfriend for not even a month but ive liked him for a really long time we were at the movies the other day and i gave him a hand job..it was my first time and now i feel really slutty and i regret it..is this normal?

Also we said that we werent going to tell ne one and that it was going to be "our little secret" but i really wanna tell my best friend..do u think i should?

You're definitely not the only one who feels slutty after they do something sexual, especially for the first time. If you regret it that much, then just wait a bit longer before you do something that sexual with him again because doing something for a guy to make him happy isn't worth the regret. And also, if the two of you agreed to keep it to yourselves, then it's probably best to do that. But, if you really want to tell your friend, then before doing so, talk to your boyfriend about it.

Q: it goes...

to the left left left left, to the right right right right, now kick kick

and i don't know what else but i googled it and couldn't find, so i was wondering if any of you heard it and knew the name?

Well I think you mght be talkig abot "Left, right" by Drama. But it's not the exact words you wrote.

Q: there's this boy i really like. i know for a fact he likes me back; he's a pretty obvious flirt and he always says shit like "im single, do you want to date me now?" and yeah. the problem is that he's good friends with one of my friends. at first i kind of ignored his advances and laughed at him because it was just a little crush and i knew that my friend would be pissed if i dated him. but now i REALLY like him, i mean he really is the sweetest boy i've ever met. i can't get over him. and now i have two problems: 1) i kind of made it seem like i didn't like him when i ignored him flirting with me/i'm pretty sure my friend told him i wasn't interested and 2) my friend would be PISSED. i've seen it happen with all of her friends before. i like him so much and i hate it. what can i do to let this kid know that i'm actually interested without hurting my friend?

If you like this guy alot, you should let your friend know, she should be understanding and respect that. You're going to like whoever you like, you can't help that. If she gets mad then that's her problem not yours. But if you think that your friendship with her is more important than your feelings for him, than don't say anything. And if you want him to know you're interested, then just flirt with him. It's that simple.

Q: i hang out with the "popular" group at school because im really good friends with them and i also have this friend who's not as popular but i still love her. i've heard alot of people saying that shes trying not to be best friends with me anymore just plain friends, because she thinks im always hanging out with my other friends. im friends with my other friends just as much as she ..like i love all of them but i really dont want to lose her as a best friend. what should i do?

16/f by the way.

Dont listen to what you hear, if you're thinking it could be true because she may start acting like it, then confront her about it.

Q: I am experiencing mild cramping in my lower back and abdomen, headaches, fatigue, stuffy nose (something terrible with no signs of cold/flu to accompany it), a larger than usual appetite, and sore breasts.

My cycles usually run between 28 to 31 days. The past 2 months they have been 30 days exactly. I am 2 days from testing right now but the not knowing is just killing me.

I have never been on birth control. My husband and I had unprotected sex on the 8th - 14th of April, each night. The 18th and again on the 22 - 23 of April, each night.

The first day of my last period was April 1, the last day, April 7.

Is there a possibility that I could be pregnant?

You could be, but you wuldn't be feeling these symptoms this soon. Alot ofthe time if a person thinks that they may be, they start to get the symptoms, make sense? Like if someone thinks they're depressed then they become depressed. But if you're still stressing out about it there's a really good site I found when I was worried too.

http://www.womens-health-questions.com/pregnancysymptoms.html

Q: ok i dont know why but im always attracted to pervy guys! haha well the crush i had in 6th grade turns out to be pretty pervy, and now the guy i like my friend says is pretty pervy too. well they're also pretty cute and funny.. why do i keep falling for these guys and not like.. un-pervy guys? or maybe pervy guys like turn me on or something? ohgod that sounded weird hahaha

Ha, I used to do the same. I'd say that it's probably just the attraction, perverted guys are easier to see yourself getting intimate with, you know? BUT, luckily I'm out of that now.

Q: Do labias vary in size? Mine seems kind of .. long, like it hangs down a little bit out of the outside lips of my vagina. Is this normal?

Mhm, it's comppletely normal, noneed to worry. But if you don't like how small or big they are you can claways get surgery like most pornstars do. =]

bio

My name is Cathy, as you can tell by my user name. I live in Florida and have been for the past 6 to 7 years. I'm in a very serious relationship with the boy of my dreams. I love him very much so, and nothing will ever change this, whether together or apart. I have a chihuahua by the name of Mung Mung. I'm half Korean and Half Scott-Irish. And that's about it for now =]