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August 13, 2006

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January 16, 2011

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I am Maria, I don't answer inbox questions (with very few exceptions, for example those people that use proper grammar and spelling). I try my best to point people in the right direction when I am answering questions.

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advice

MOM said something about having to take me for a pepsmear next week since im started having periods now and im dating. what's a pep smear? cant figure it out

Actually you don't need a pap smear until a year and a half to two years of when you first become sexually active. It checks for changes in the cells of your cervix, and can find the earliest signs of cervical cancer. Most women get it at age 21, and continue to get it done once every two years. At age thirty, most women go on to getting it done every three years, if their results are normal.

The pap smear (or pap test) is done during a pelvic exam: the doctor inserts a speculum into the vagina which opens it up, allowing them to see the cervix. The cervix is then gently scraped with a brush to collect some cells. They are then wiped off on a glass slide and sent to the lab. You will know your results in about three weeks. The experience is not painful, but can be a little uncomfortable.

MAK, 19

For the past few days my tongue has been really painful. It feels a little swollen and is now white colored on top where like my tastebuds are. It is really nasty. I don't really know what this could be. Is it an STD or something? How do I make it go away? Thanks

Actually it sounds like it could be thrush. Please go to the doctor as soon as possible, and especially it being in your mouth, it could be contagious as well.

I am not doctor, and I have no idea what it is, but gargling salt water for now might help alleviate the pain. But you will still need to see the doctor.

MAK, 19

how do you make your crotch smell better?

(female)

Please don't use douche! It can cause infections in the vagina because it dis-balances the pH. The vagina is a self-cleaning organ, so lucky for you there is little you have to do.

What you should do, however, is shower daily, washing the genital area with a mild soap (just the external bits!), and wipe after you use the bathroom. If you want, you can carry baby wipes or feminine wipes and wipe with those.

If that area smells bad, it could be a sign of infection. If you have a strange smell accompanied by an abnormal discharge, then I would go to the doctor to get checked out.

MAK, 19

18/f
So I was at a party and I seen this guy there that I havent seen in a few years. We will call him Luke. We talk a little and so on. I get really wasted and pass out. I woke back up a few hours later and went downstairs to the party. I went back up stairs to pass out again cause I was still wasted and Luke was in the room. He was drunk too. He asked if he could pass out in there too or something. I said whatever sure. So we are laying down and just talking about people from school and stuff. I asked him if he had a girlfriend and he said something like that they were on bad terms or something. He grabs my hand. Then our faces are getting closer and closer together and we start making out. Then before I knew it, my pants were off. Then he went to get a condom and came back in the room and we had sex. After that we cuddled the rest of the night and stuff. My friend comes in the room and says we have to leave and Luke is still passed out and nothing will wake him up so I left without saying bye. I texted him a little later and told him that I kinda felt bad about what had happened because he has a girlfriend. Then he texts me and asks what happened. WTF right!? I was thinking how the hell am I supposed to tell him this. So i told him and his reaction was just oh boy. Then he said that its his fault not mine and to just let it pass. So thats where the situation is now. What should I do? I want to talk to him so badly but I dont want to come off as desperate. I know im going to see him again. Thats a fact. Oh yeah, he has been dating this girl for like 3 years or so.

I think you should do nothing. I would pretend that nothing ever happened, so that things won't be awkward. As for his girlfriend, unless she is a close friend of yours, you tell her nothing. Her boyfriend should be the one to tell her, and even though you hooked up with her boyfriend, it still doesn't give you a right to interfere in their relationship.

If you are going to hook up with him again, its your choice. If I were you, I wouldn't want anything to do with a cheater, and I would also feel pretty bad for the girlfriend to. Although I personally don't support going after taken men, I'm not exactly against it either, as long as you understand that your emotions should stay out of it, because chances are you will get hurt, or if he leaves her for you, its still not a great starting block for a relationship. (Also, once a cheater always a cheater).

You didn't describe what relationship you had with "Luke," whether you like him, he's a friend, or an ex, etc. But regardless go get tested for STD's (as you should after each sex partner).

~MAK, 19

I've had two abortions previously and they have been very expensive $$$. I just found out that I'm pregnant again and I don't want the baby and so my first thought was to have another abortion right away. I called the clinic and they gave me the same estimate as the previous time and I really don't have that kind of money right now and don't know how I can come up with the money. Is there a way I can get a cheap abortion or something really low-cost? I just turned 18 a couple of weeks back so I don't think my parents insurance would cover it or anything either so that's kind of out of the question I think. I don't think I can ask my parents for money for the abortion this time because they already paid for the first one I had.

I'm up for any ideas you guys might have.

Thanxxx

What is it with all your fake questions?

Sex makes your boobs bigger, peeing prevents pregnancy, the chlamydia one, tanning with a tampon, pads in the water, etc, etc, etc.

If you're spending all this time making up questions for your amusement, I really suggest you do something better with your time.

Edit: judging from the variety of questions you submit, and the different ages you say you are (13 wtih some, 16, 22... virgin, whore... etc). I mean you really think your questions sound believable?

i have 3 long haired cats and of course their hair gets all over everything. when i go back to school i dont want to have cat hair all over my blankets and stuff for my dorm. what is the best way to get cat hair off blankets & bigger stuff like that? i dont want to have to use one of those roller things because i need to do it to like all my blankets and sheets and that would just be a lot

A pumice stone works pretty well on a lot of fabrics. Or you can try scrubbing it off with a damp paper towel.

When waz ur first kiss?

I believe I was 14 of 15, and it was terrible. I was super nervous and shaking, and I wasn't ready to kiss him yet. His lips were really squishy and wet which I didn't expect and it really grossed me out. To make it worse, he kissed me at the movies right in front of my best friend and her little sister (his cousins, that's how I met them).

It was just terrible. It took me a while to kiss someone again after that.

MAK, 19

i heard that the st. ives apricot scrub makes you break out and it scratches and cuts your face. is that true?

This was a long time ago, but I do remember using it a few years ago and it was very irritating to my skin, and then beads inside the cream were very abrasive.

Right now I'm using a St Ive's Apricot Scrub for sensitive skin. And I'm in love with it. It's not abrasive whatsoever, doesn't irritate my skin, in fact it makes moisturized and significantly softer. I also use it on my lips and instantly get moisturized smooth lips.

I couldn't be happier with the product. I've only used it for a week, and it does cause some breakage at first because its bringing all the dirt to the surface of the skin causing you to break out, but this shouldn't last long, the breakout isn't too bad, and mine is already clearing up. Once sll the initial dirt is gone and you continue exfoliating your skin, you shouldn't break out any more.

MAK, 19

13/f

Some friends from school told me that having sex will make your boobs grow. I have really small boobs and I hate it so I thought I would give it a try. I'm not sure I'm doing it right though. I just dunno but I want my boobs to be pretty big.

I had sex with 7 boys from my grade at school but nothing really changed for me and my boobs were still small. I was talking to my dad's friend on Facebook and he said he thought sex made breasts grow only if the girl had sex with a guy older than her. So, we ended up having sex, obv.

It just seems like this is taking foreverrr and I just want my barely A cups to go to like a DD. I know that's a big leap but it's what I WANT. After having sex w/my dad's friend I think they seem to be a little more full but not much.

I went on and posted some match ads online and there is 4 guys who say they want to do it with me so my boobs will grow. My first thinking is that if I do it with them all at once then my boobs will grow faster all at once. They're all up for it but I want to know if it will still work that way. I don't want to like have sex with them all together and then my boobs don't grow at all. Does anyone know if you have sex with more than 1 guy at a time if your boobs will still grow? They're all a lot older than me so that shouldn't be a prob.

((And before you start answering don't worry about me getting pregnant. I know the guy has to cum in you for this to work but I haven't started my period yet so I can't get pregnant anyways.))

Please explain the point of asking fake questions.

Okay lets say you knew this girl was fourteen dating a sixteen year old boy, if you found out that she (she's now fifteen) let him finger her, gave him a hj and a bj, would you judge her?? they dated for seven months. I think you can see that I'm the girl... haha

In my personal opinion I think she is way too young for this kind of physical relationship. Also, because the boy is a bit older, I would wonder if he had anything to do with pressuring her into this, or perhaps she participated in this behavior because "everyone else is doing it."

And not to blow it out of proportion, but its possible to get STD's from this kind of behavior, and if I hear of someone getting an STD younger than 18, my immediate response is what has that she done to her life, and where in the world were her parents? Just something to think about.

MAK, 19

15/f

hi. so this my be a weird question. but hey, this is what this site is for right?
well i hate hair (besides on my head).
well i was wondering if girls (but mainly guys) thinks its weird to shave my arms
i have before, but my step sister thought it was kind of weird.
well i would like opinions of this.
please and thank you.

Well I was a competitive swimmer all throughout middle school and high school, but I didn't start shaving my arms until I was about 15. I think its perfectly normal, but sometimes I wish I hadn't even started because my arms weren't too bad, but our coach made us for swimming, and now if I don't shave them its an ugly stubbly mess. So just keep that in mind, you can stop now before its too late so you don't have to keep shaving them for the rest of your life.

MAK, 19

i think someone lied to my friend! she told her that if she washes her hair in cold water it will shine better than any product could make it. does anyone know if this is really true?

if you KNOW for a FACT that it works can you tell us why does cold water make your hair shiny?

thanks a lot!

I don't know about making it shinier than any product could make it, but yes, it does help make your hair more shiny. As the person below me said, it smooths down the "scales," more commonly known as sealing in the cuticle.

To make your hair even shinier, you can use the cool air setting on your blow drier if you plan to blow dry it or use heat after washing your hair.

MAK, 19

Hi all :) I'll make this as short and simple as I can to conserve your time and patience.

I have never had sex and don't intend to engage in doing so for a good while. In the meantime, my boyfriend has fingered me many many times, not to be rude or anything. By this time, my hymen is already broken, no big deal. Yet I still bleed, kind of excessively. And it's really annoying.

Now I'm not sure, and I apologize if I sound ignorant, but I think I might have a hunch at why this is happening? I thought perhaps because the uterine lining is built with blood to nest a baby or shed during menstruation, that's he's possibly irratating the lining and causing a large amount of blood from the lining to end up on his fingers and in my underwear? Not too sure.

If you know anything about why I keep bleeding, please inform me.

P.S.: even if his nails are short, this keeps happening and I can't think of anything else of why this would keep occurring.

Thank you so much

First of all, the uterine lining is way past your vagina and where his fingers would be. There is a sphincter called the cervix (shaped like a tightly clenched fist) separating the vaginal canal from the uterus.

I'm not a doctor, but here are some possibilities of what could be happening. You could possibly have an inflamed cervix, and his fingers are hitting/rubbing against it causing the bleeding.

Or... and this goes hand in hand with the inflamed cervix, it is quite possible you could have an STD or an infection. A common symptom of Chlamydia, for example, is vaginal bleeding after something's been up there.

I would go to the doctor and get this checked out. The majority of people with STD's have no idea they have them because they show no symptoms. (So you could have unknowingly got it from your boyfriend or a previous partner, and didn't suspect a thing because everything looked "normal.") Just a not, you don't have to be having intercourse to get an STD.

MAK, 19

So I got a traffic ticket for not stopping at a stop sign. At first it was $125 fine, but because I'm going to traffic school for it, it is now $175 (but it won't raise my insurance, and it will be taken off my driving record).

Well, long story short, I have no money to pay it. I'm not exactly sure when I have to pay it yet, I haven't gotten a letter from the court saying if they approve the traffic school.

But when I do get it, do I pay the ticket first, and then pay for traffic school? Or the other way around? Because my parents are paying for traffic school, and if traffic school is first, it'll buy me more time to figure our how to pay for this ticket.

What do you do when you can't afford to pay a fine? Do you get further fines for it for not paying it? I don't have a job right now, I've been desperately trying to find one for the past month. My parents absolutely refuse to help me out. There is a very slight chance I might find one in about three weeks, its my last hope.

~F/19

It is too late to fight the ticket. I'm on the last couple steps before paying it, and that is getting traffic school approved by the court so I don't have to pay extra on my insurance.

Hello i have a question. I have started growing as of you know and I am about turn 13 i havent got my period yet alot of my friends say thats unnormal is that true??? And I dont like talking to my mom about it it makes me feel un comfertable so i need help thanks alot

I know exactly how you feel. I didn't get my period until I was 16, the DEAD LAST one to get it of all my friends.

Most girls get their periods when they are 12 or 13, but many others get it later than that. If you don't get it by the time you're 16 however, you should talk to your doctor. But you still have plenty of time to get it still.

What determines when you get your period is genes, your body fat percentage (that's why hardcore athletes stop getting their periods, because sometimes they don't have enough body fat), and also how much you have already developed.

And actually talking to your mom about it will not only bring you two closer, but make you feel more comfortable about your body, and plus she can help you out with the feminine hygiene products you will need when you do get it (pads, tampons, whatever you decide to use).

For now, just enjoy your period-free days while you can. Sure you're relieved and happy and feel grown up when you get it, but those feelings get quickly replaced of dreading your next period because its messy, and cramps are no fun. Neither is forgetting to bring a tampon, or worrying if your pad or tampon is leaking. Its just really no fun, so enjoy these days while they last, because you'll probably be getting your period soon.

MAK, 19

I'm 18 and my bf is 19, we are planning on getting married, is it the right thing to do?

No. Why? Because the two of you are still very young, and haven't morphed into your complete adult selves. Both of you are yet to experience a lot of personal growth - your views on some of life's most important things are yet to change, perhaps even more than once. This includes what you want from a relationship as well. Five years down the road, your boyfriend may be a bit of a different person than you fell in love with, and so will you.

Wait at least three more years. Do the two of you plan to go to college? So far I'm guessing you've been in your relationship throughout high school, well relationships in the adult world are very different. Give it a few more years, and see if your relationship can make it through that.

There's no rush, you have your whole lives to be together, and you want to make sure that you're making the right decision.

MAK, 19

I have a question about getting my ears pierced. So I'm gunna get my ears pierced this friday and im 14 which is kinda lateish for a girl my age i guess but i got them done when i was little but let them close up ..ok ahah whatver. anyways when i get them done does it hurt? I remember it hurt maybe cuz i was just little or something. And one more thing would it be bad to get like your first and second piercing done at the same time? will it hurt? THANKYOU

Every person is different, but for me it didn't hurt. I just feels like a slight pinch, and then you don't feel anything for an hour or two, but then your ears do get a little sore, but nothing to take Advil over.

I got mine done with a gun however, (which I actually don't recommend because its more likely they'll get infected because most places, like Claire's don't clean their guns that well, and the gun tends to crush the tissue which prevents it from healing faster). I would get it done with a needle at a professional piercing parlor, where they properly sterilize their equipment in an autoclave. But I can't tell you if the needle is more or less painful because I haven't gotten my ears pierced this way.

I would get both at the same time, just to get it over with, but your ears will probably be more sore than if you were to get one done. If you're not sure, get your first piercings done first, and decide then if you want to continue with the seconds in one day.

MAK, 19

I am going swimming tomorrow but I started my period today, a few days earlier than usual. I absolutely refuse to wear tampons for health reasons so please do not just give me that suggestion. No tampons for me, thank you!

My family has been planning this trip to the water park for weeks now and I can't just back out of it right before we go. I thought that maybe I could wear a pad in the pool and everything would be alright. I'm almost 15 and I thought I could maybe meet some boys at the water park this summer so I really want to go and have fun.

Then, I got to thinking, won't the sticky stuff on the bottom of it come loose in the pool water? The adhesive part. I really don't have any experience with this and I really do want to go swimming tomorrow and hang out with some people.

Does anybody know if a pad will come off in the water and float around. That would be embarrassing...

(Category: Menstrual Pad Etiquette...right? ;) Haha.)

Don't wear a pad. If you don't like tampons, get a menstrual cup, they're fine to swim in, and don't have the negative health effects (no risk of TSS, no harmful chemicals, cheaper in the long run, cleaner, no leakage, the list goes on and on).

MAK, 19

Ok so I shaved the top part of my vaGina and now it hurts when I rub up it. Like I can rub or smotth it down but up it hurts really bad. I've never shaved it before though! Grr pleaseeee help me now!!!

Ya, its just one of the downsides of shaving that area. It'll go away as the hair grows back, but it will be itchy and irritated for a while.

I would put some soothing lotion on it that contains aloe.

MAK, 19

To your feedback: yes it will. Some alternatives would be waxing or using an epilator, which are both pretty painful.

my boyfriend has kissed 5 girls but was only together with 2 of them, what kind of guy does that make him?

I think it makes him a normal guy. However if he led them on, and made them believe he had feelings for them when in fact he didn't, then its something to be concerned about since you don't want the same thing to happen to you. But, he is your boyfriend, so obviously he made a commitment to you and likes you, but if your at that sexually active stage, and you are concerned that he does lead girls on, then make him wait for it. However, judging from the nature of this question, I'm guessing you're a young teen.

MAK, 19

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