GodsGift2Writing's advice column

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Q: I'm 13 and im looking for a job but everyone seems to have to be 14 or older but im a girl and i have needs (girls u no what i meen) and my mom won't let me babysit for others so someone offer advice for jobs i can do

Well, i hate to tell you this, but you DO have to be AT LEAST 15 to get working papers, and 16 to have an actual job, with a paying contract. However, there are plenty of ways you can get paid for doing things for people off-contract, known as "under-the-table". Try setting up a local talent show in your area, have a car-wash, set up a lemonade stand, read to little kids, become a dog-walker, shovel driveways/rake leaves...Just simple things if you're not allowed to babysit. There are plenty of options you can explore! The ones listed above are just a few great things you can do to earn money- ANDDDD at the same time, you're serving the community. Now, come on, what's better than that? =]

Q: My best friend jazmine dated this guy named tyson and she fell in love with him, he broke up with her and got together with a girl named kayla. Jazmine so isnt over it and is constantly trying to make him jealous and is even losing weight to try and get him back. She's goig to extremes and i dont know what to say to her to make her stop! She wont listen to me and the guy is a total jerk! She's not moving on how can i help her?

Well, from any perspective, this could turn out to be a serious problem. It's not good at all that your friend is trying to lose weight...As i'm sure you know it is a sign of a possible diagnosis of Anorexia Nervousa. The absolute BEST thing that you can do for your friend (regardless of how many times she rejects) is to TALK TO A TRUSTED ADULT IMMMEDIATELY! Make sure it is either a parent or guardian of your friend, and explain to them what is going on. It may not seem as bad as i'm making it sound, but trust me, things could get very difficult for your friend. It could also turn into a life-threatening situation. So please, act now, as soon as you can before things go any further, if you want to help your friend.

Q: I'm not a boy-crazy person. I'm 16 years old, I've never had a boyfriend, never been kissed, and that has never bothered me. However I met one of the new staff at my high-school. Well he's obviously an older man (late 20's) and he's, for lack of a better term, hot. And as level-headed as I believe myself to be, I am also a teenage girl with a tendency to fantasize and flirt. This can not end anyway but in embarassment and disaster, and I'll most likely see him everyday. How can I go to school, interact with the man and keep myself in check?

To make this clear, No I don't wish to persue a relationship with the man, it's just the thought of the man's tongue down my throat doesn't exactly freak me out.

Thanks,
StupidHormones

Dear StupidHormones,

At your age, it is PERFECTLY NORMAL to be feeling this way- especially about an older guy! So don't doubt that for a second! But, in my opinion, (and i'm sure of many others as well) it's good that you've been saving yourself and not just taking what comes along. Since you're most likely to flirt with this guy, my advice would be to do it at a distance...For your benefit, AND his. You see, this guy works at your school...If any other authorities (including your principal, teachers, students, etc...) see even the slightest thing to make them think there is an innapropriate relationship between the two of you, word WILL get around, and more importantly, you could get that guy in SERIOUS TROUBLE. Even if you defend him by saying you did all the flirting, it could STILL be used against him. Here's what i would do, just try to keep your distance, admire from afar, and maybe try to find someone your own age to distract you from him. Who knows? The right guy for you could be just around the hallway. =]

Stay strong,
GodsGift2Writing

Q: 15/f
Ok, where I live usually people go out at night.
Sometimes drinking sometimes just walking around, going to the park, having a good time etc.
I always get asked but I make up excuses to turn them(my friends) down.
Most people go home by 11pm anyway so it's not a big deal or anything.(They are all 15-17) Some of the older people stay out later, or the people with more relaxed parents.
I've never been sure how to ask my parents if I could go out with my friends at night...
How can I approach them about this, what should I say to them, etc?
I really want to go out with my friends...but I'm not sure what my parents will say.
They trust me so that's no problem, and they've always been the more relaxed kind...but I'm not sure about this topic.

Any help?
Thanks!

Hmm...This is a tough one in which to decipher a solution, but i think i've got an answer. Try sitting down with your parents and tell them your friends go out at night, and that you would like to join them...You say that some of them go out drinking? Well, i suggest you tell your parents that, because it's better to be honest. BUT, explain to them that you will NOT do as some others do, and this will give them a chance to trust you more than they do already. And given the chance, by showing them something, the odds are good that they will extend your curfew- Reasonably, that is...I mean, they ARE your parents. But hey, it's worth discussing...Isn't it?

Q: it's my grandma's 79th birthday. i have to make a card but i dont know what to say! help!

Well, unfortunately, I can't tell you word-for-word what to say...but i can give you a few guidelines. =]

The most important thing about this is being creative. Write a short poem, telling her how all her years of wisdom has helped guide you through important times in your life. Or even just write a sentence or two explaining how important she is to you. Now, i'm not saying you have to go all Emily Dickenson on her...But a few nice words is always a kind gesture. =]

Q: does anyone know where i can watch online episodes of dawsons creek, but seasons 4-6. ive already been to sidereel and surf the channel. any other websites with the show?

Try visiting Youtube.com- just search "Dawson's creek episodes", and you should get a few results. =]

Q: Well i wanted to take guitar lessons, and i was wondering what type of guitar would be the easiest to learn?
Or which kind wouldn't be so hard on my fingers, because ive heard that they can make your fingers sore.

Finally, a question I can answer at heart!
I have been playing guitar for the past 8 years now, and I have NEVER taken guitar lessons. From this I know that you definately want to start learning on an ACOUSTIC guitar. TRUE, electric guitars have "softer strings" and also, it is easier to slide across the fretboard- BUT!, this is why it is better to learn on an acoustic- to get your fingers used to the roughness of the strings. Because no matter what kind of guitar you get, when you're first starting, you're gonnna get calluses, and they're gonna hurt! Also, the type of strings you put on your guitar can have a lot to do with it. Make sure when you have your strings changed, tell them you're a beginner, and they will assist you with softer strings. But if you practice often, you should get better in no time! Have fun, and don't give up! Giving up is for drummers! =]

Q: well im new at school and there is a good amount of kids in my grade..well im doing pretty good meeting girls but i really want tome good guy friends but it always seems harder to approach guys than girls. so my question..how should i approach guys and talk to them and introduc myself? i do i get guys to start talking to me at school? i want to be popular (in the good way like im friends with everyone) and usually i have lots of friends and talk to lots of people so im trying to get like that in my new school. so any tips and tricks on how to talk to guys would be so helpful!! thank you so much :)

Well, there's one thing I feel I must tell you: Do NOT change for anyone. I mean, don't do something someone else does just to be their friend. There are plenty of people who will like you for who you are, and those are the people you should stick with, otherwise, it could get you into trouble. Now, I, personally have a few good guy friends- and i met most of them in class! It's good to just start up a conversation with someone you see. Of course not in the weird random stalker way, but in a friendly way...I mean, that's what you want isn't it? =] Maybe you'll get lucky and that cute guy sitting in front of you in math class will accidently drop his pencil right next to your foot...That's when you pick it up for him. And while you're at it, exchange a smile, or maybe a "hey, that shirt looks really good on you." Guys can be like girls sometimes, in the way that they feel good to the occasional compliment- just as women do. You never know...maybe he likes your shoes! =]

Q: I'm a female & 15.

I wanna try to tease my boyfriend and get him hard, but I don't really seem to know what to do. I have given him a lapdance before and I could feel his hard penis on my ass as I was giving him a lapdance but I don't feel like giving him another one :). I also play with his jeans close to where his penis is but I'm not completely sure if he's turned on or not.

Well, my question is, what can I do to turn him on and get him hard without oral or actual sex.

Thanks in advance!

One word:
Cinnamon.

Q: i love my boyfriend alot, but everytime we argue, he gets mad and turns his phone off so i cant get ahold of him. he likes to make me feel like its always my fault...what do i do?

Well, for starters, you aren't doing anything wrong. You're actually doing the right thing by trying to get in touch with him. Now, you can't really blame him for turning off his phone, because sometimes, the BEST way to cool down(whether it be from an argument, or anything else to get a rage going) is to isolate yourself from what was bothering you. (In a HEALTHY way of course!!!) Maybe your boyfriend listens to music when his phone is off, or maybe he's drawing, or writing...What i'm trying to say is that maybe the thing that he does to calm down, is something you don't know he can do. A lot of the time, men are embarrassed about their hidden talents, and refuse to tell anyone. That could be why he doesn't answer your calls. What you should do, is sit down and talk to him- when you AREN'T fighting. Tell him how it makes you feel when he makes it hard to communicate. Like, REALLY make him understand. I'm sure once he gets the point, if he truly cares, he'll realize that he is wrong in that situation. And also that he should take more time to consider your feelings after a fight, as well as his.

Q: Hi! I'm getting these thigh-high striped socks in the peacock color but I'm not quite sure how to wear them without looking trashy. What would you wear them with?

http://tinyurl.com/5u8272

I've got Mary Janes for shoes, so that's covered.
Thanks a bunch!

Well, to tell you the truth, I WOULDN'T wear them. Haha. It's just not my style, but since it's yours, i'll see if i can help. You see, when you see people walking down the street, you can usually tell by their visual impression if they are trashy...Am i right? I'm not saying everyone walking down the street is trashy, i'm just saying that you can almost always see when they are. Do you know why? NOT because of WHAT they wear, but HOW they wear it. That's right, the attitude of a person is the first thing to be noticed, if you get what I mean. So, what i'm saying is, you won't look trashy unless you go out of your way to do so. I know that's probably not the answer you were looking for, but i had to put that there. Now, what to wear with them...It really depends on what image you're going for. For instance, you COULD wear them with a blue plaid skirt and a white collared shirt. Or you COULD wear them with a slim red dress...Do you see where i'm going with this? However you plan to look is entirely up to you...Just be careful how much effort you put into it.

Q: right, i love kissing girl(tung) but i dont no if i do it wrong or if they dont like it. can i get some tips please!??

Haha, Alright, this is a good one. Well, since every girl has different likes and dislikes, it's kind of hard to say because it depends on her. But, there are however, some tips i can give you to improve your kissing skills.

1. Let it come NATURALLY! =]
When you begin kissing, just let your lips and hers guide you; At least to start.

2. Take your time.
Think about it, during a "make-out session" you're taking the time to explore the mouth of the person you're in contact with. So don't rush, enjoy it.

3. Don't swish your tongue around like a windmill.
Like i said, every girl is different, but i can tell you that NO girl likes it when there's a hurricane going on inside her mouth! Just be sensitive, and really get into it. The feel is the charm.

ALSO!
There are different types of kisses you can give. In other words, you don't have to use your tongue every time.

Lip Kisses:
You may or may not know this, but you can kiss the top lip, or the bottom lip when kissing. You may not realize this unless you really take the time to tell the difference, but i'll tell ya, the girl can definately tell!

The Ear Kiss:
On a girl, the back and side of the ear is a very sensitive place...Imagine how a soft sensation of your lips would feel to her.

Kissing the Neck:
When you're kissing a girl's neck, you want to make sure you take your time with it. Almost like you plan to kiss every inch. Start at the top, and work your way to her collarbone; Trust me...She'll love it. =]

Q: So, my friend's name is Rhianna and the boy we like is Elliott. We're all 13. I've liked Elliott for a long time, and Rhianna met him once and fell for him. He awful nice. I know this being a friend to him for about a year or so. He wouldn't want us going out to corrupt Rhianna and I's friendship. My problem is Rhianna doesn't know Elliott likes me. She doesn't even know I like him back. She has a lot of relationship problems so I'm very careful with her love life, and try to help her as much as possible. As far as I know right now she doesn't want to date. I know it's wrong to do it behind her back, if I were to, so how do I tell her? Gently!

Something like this happened before. Her boyfriend Kyle dumped her for me, and I, ignorantly, went out with him. She told me she cried a lot after that happened cause I was favored over her. That's why I'm so worried about this situation! I like Elliott A LOT. I think more than she does, because I've known him longer. But I'm not going to go off and assume things. She says she likes him a little. Do you think it's wrong if I date him, if Rhianna says it's okay? Am I a bad person?

I know what most of you will want to say. Don't let a boy come between your friendship! It's not worth it! Or, Elliott will understand if you say no and don't want to jeopardize your friendship. I KNOW this, and if something goes wrong I'll do anything to keep our friendship, even if it means losing the guy in the end. I'm asking how do I try to make it work.

Okay, okay, calm down. First of all, I am NOT going to tell you not to let a boy come between your friendship. (although that's what I should say, haha) But I am going to tell you what you need to do to make things work. See, the first step: Talk to that best friend of yours! =] Ask her if she wouldn't mind you trying things with the boy you both like, you never know, she may tell you to go for it...Which is really what a good friend would do, unless of course she has the same burning flame for him as you do. But if you don't want to jeopardize your relationship with your friend, you should definately consider talking to her about it. Especially if she's aware that you favor him as well as she does. Now the second step: Talk to that boy! See, if this guy knows that the both of you like him, he might try see if he can get his way with both of you, and if that's the case, you need to step down and ditch him. But on the other hand, he could be a genuine guy, right? You should at least let him know your friend has feelings for him as well, and right there you should be able to tell if he'll be faithful to you...And trust me: "faithfully" is better than "generally". If you know what I mean.

Q: ok. first off when i have sex with my boyfriend i always get this really good feeling for about 5 seconds. i dont know if this is an orgasm of not. i have squirt before but not alot. so basically. what exactly is an orgasm (full details) and how long does it take to get it.

Well, for starters, let me explain that there are two types of orgasm: Clitoral and Vaginal. Now, depending on what sexual acts you and your boyfriend are engaging, it will determine which type of orgasm you may, or may not get. Believe it or not, about 70% of the time, women climax but do not orgasm during sexual activity. In general, an orgasm is a pleasurable feeling caused by sexual desire and satisfaction. Due to your description, what you are feeling is certainly sexual satisfaction. But to determine if it is truly an orgasm or not, is entirely your call. You see, when a women enters her climatic peak during sex, she feels a sensation caused by a rare feeling known as desire. So, really, your desire is surely effecting you, causing you to orgasm. The time it takes to be aroused and complete an orgasm depends soley on the woman, and how well her partner is feeding her needs. So, you can't really control when you get it, how you get it, or how long you want it to last. That's why the majority of sexually active couples are usually intimate more than one time in a single day. And keep in mind, you don't necessarily have to cum to have an orgasm, every woman is different.

bio

Hey there everyone =]
My name's Elliott, and I'm here to answer all of your burning questions! And since I'm getting to know you, I think it'd be a good idea to let you know a bit about me. I'm just a 16-year-old girl, and a Junior in high school. I'd say with my story, I have some experience in answering many of high school's most common questions(See my Favorite Categories). Generally, I love to play the guitar and the piano. Writing, whether it be lyrics, short stories
or poetry, well, I've always had a passion
for it =] I'm News Editor for my high school paper, and Poetry Co-Editor for the magazine- So if you have any English questions, be sure I'm the one you ask! Haha (: If there's anything else you're curious to know, then just go ahead and ask! I won't bite, i promise [= Ask for my cell number too if you want, I'll share.