I aim to give you solid advice on your problems. I don't sugarcoat things and I'm always straight up. Don't come asking for what you want to hear as I always give the truth even if you don't want it because it's what you need and the only way to grow.
Gender: Male
Member Since: December 31, 2006
Answers: 3591
Last Update: August 30, 2022
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So im not sure if i have avoidant personality disorder or social anxiety disorder but i do know my anxiety and mental health is starting to control my life and i want it to stop. My symptoms are.. not being able to take criticism or negative feedback, i always end up crying, any change of actions or change in peoples tones of voices make me feel uneasy as if the person is mad at me and again makes me cry. I dont like being the centre of attention, if something embarrassing happens to me in front of people i start panicking and my heart starts racing faster, i cant take rejection especially when its in front of people again it will make me cry, i cant deal with confrontation all it does is make me run away,and also to this day the confrontations ive had are still haunting me in my dreams im over them consciously but i guess not subconsciously. I was always the quiet kid in class at first it was shyness but then in highschool whenever i would talk people would say "why do you talk like that?" or why do you have no emotion in your face? (Apparently i have a monotone voice and my face has no emotion at all) so now i fear people are judging me whenever i talk so i dont and when i do talk in public my voice is automatically soft-spoken now so that people dont detect my monotone voice and i cant control being soft-spoken sometimes my voice is so low that it sounds like im mumbling. Also i dont know why i do this but whenever i talk to people,even if theyre the same age as me i always treat them like theyre superior even though theyre not. My anxiety got really bad in grade 12 when i did a group presentation and i was the centre of attention i was prepared for it but as soon as it was my turn i was shaking, my face turned hot and my eyes were blacking out and i could just feel one of my group members annoyed with how i was presenting, if i talked any longer i wouldve fainted. My first year of university i had one class where the teacher forced us to talk in front of everyone and my anxiety made me avoid going to that class.i finally got a job and the job requires me to interact with customers and so far it has been so hard,i dont know why im afraid of people. I can talk to people if they talk to me first but i wont talk to them first. My sister at her work made tons of friends and shes only been working 3 days meanwhile ive been working for 3 weeks now and ive just now made 2 friends at my work. I also avoid entering rooms by myself that are already filled with a lot of people because i hate being looked at, and if theres a crowd of boys thats when my anxiety kicks in the most. I dont want to compare myself to my sister shes 2 years younger than me but shes already been in almost relationships with guys at least 3 times and at her workplace her new friends all complimented how she looked. Meanwhile i dont get any compliments or male attention, my dad said its cause i always have an angry expression on my face (resting b face) but i use that as a defense mechanism. Any tips on how to overcome this? I know none of you are doctors but i just want some advice thanks im 18 turning 19 year old female. (link)
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It is vitally important that you not live as though you suffer from a mental illness until a psychiatrist consults proper criteria and tells you that you have one. You cannot diagnose yourself or allow that to hold you back. Only they can pinpoint a problem and come up with treatment.
I think you should see your family doctor and outline the problem you are having and how it is constantly negatively impacting life and ask for a referral to a psychiatrist. From what you have written it does seem to be an anxiety problem that completely consumes. They will know exactly what to do.
Can you solve this by yourself or without their help? Probably not. There's nothing wrong with taking medical help or medicine if it makes your life better. Seek out help now.
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I don't know what's wrong with me tbh. My friends use to tease me A LOT in hurtful ways but that was like a year ago. I don't know what happened this year but they are much more nicer to me and it freaks me out!
I know I am suppose to be happy but It just feels so alien to me. When they are being nice I don't know how to respond or act, I get shy and nervous.
We fight sometimes and that's like the time I get to be myself.
I avoid hanging out with them because of this, I now usually hang out with another friend who teases and insults me a lot, I also insult back and feel a sense of PEACE and FREEDOM.
Oh and you must think I am some kind of bitch but I am not, I like giving and making people happy and I don't do it to get something in return.
Am I just weird? (link)
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A real friend should not be insulting you or inflicting hurt on purpose. That's not normal unless you have mistaken lighthearted ribbing as something bigger or have a lot of sensitivity. The keyword here is hurtful remarks. Why would they suddenly change their behavior? I don't know.
If your gut makes you feel as though you shouldn't hang out with them now than it's telling you this for a reason. You're better off. You should never feel nervous around anybody or not wanting to be around them. This is your clue that you need to jettison them.
As far as the new friend goes explain to them that you value friendship but think it isn't doing either of you any good to insult one another on purpose. They should agree and all will be fine.
As far as feeling a sense of peace and freedom in retaliation yes, that's weird. Why would you feel happy about the same thing that hurts you being felt by them?
I think what you really need is a therapist to work through all of this and your feelings, self-worth and anxiety.
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hello. i'm a 26/f. I am a full time teacher and I have a second job teaching ESL to children in China from 6am-7am, right before I head to work. This second job has helped me a lot! I'm very grateful for it, especially, since this year, I was working at a school where I wasn't making so much money.
However, lately, I find myself very stressed and I'm not sure why. I was working three jobs at one point this year (just a few weeks ago, actually). I was working the ESL job in the morning, then, work all day, and afterward, tutoring in the afternoon. I was exhausted. So, I quit the tutoring job. You would think that my stress level has gotten better, but, in reality, I don't feel any better at all. I'm not sleeping well, I wake up more tired than when I went to sleep. My stomach is really swollen. I experience constant constipation or I go to the bathroom excessively. It's always one of the two. I don't go normally every day. I'm usually nauseous. I really only eat salad. However, I still find that I'm gaining weight by the days.
I look absolutely terrible My hair is brittle. There's bags under my eyes. It seems like I'm doing everything right. I'm eating healthy and I quit the third job. But, somehow, it hasn't helped. I know we are nearing the end of the year and I understand that we are all excited and anxious for summer. However, I just feel really edgy. The children are not helping. They are being very loud, talking excessively, and I just feel like it's tunnel vision. I don't feel in control of my own body or my classroom.
Has anyone ever experienced anything like this?
thank you in advance.
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Get your butt to the doctor as soon as possible. Something is not right here with the picture. If you are always stressed, cannot focus and are always dealing with constipation or excessive trips to the bathroom than this needs to be seen to or it will get worse. It sounds as though exhaustion is a part of this as could mental health issue such as depression. Both should be looked in to,. You definitely aren't eating right.
I can't tell you while your belly hurts and don't know exactly where it hurts be it sides or elsewhere but mention it because it is important especially if you see it swollen. A doctor can figure out what's happening and help you get well.
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I started taking lamotrogine/lamictal on the 23rd of April and I barely upgraded to 100mg yesterday. Each time I eat I feel nauseated. This happened last time I took lamotrigine so I stopped taking it, and eventually had to take it again due to bipolar disorder. The nausea started the first week when I started taking it and lasted for nearly 2 weeks. It eventually subsided but now it seems it's coming back.
I am also eating about 50/60 carbs a day and I have been doing this for a week or so.
My blood sugar is now running in the low 100s or lower. I'm experiencing nausea and lack of appetite (which I suppose might be caused by the medication) Again, I've been eating low carb for a week or so and I've had no problems.
Could it be from the medication or from the diet?
(I am also not diabetic) (link)
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This is actually a major side-effect of lamictal whe you first start on it and your body needs to adjust. It's normal to feel like you are going to toss your cookies at first. It will iron out and after 6 weeks the drug will have kicked in properly.
No doubt you are on some brand of lithium and an anti-psychotic medication for bipolar disorder. When all three are dialled in with dosage that is right for you you're going to find you can really function and be free for the most part of any negative affects of the disease.
How the hell do I know? I'm on lithium, I'm on lamictal and on an anti-psychotic. I'm fine and productive and you will be too.
It's actually dangerous and an all-around bad idea to take yourself off of lamictal or any of the other drugs yourself. It can land you in a hospital in a worst position having to start from scratch with treatment for bipolar disorder.
What you should do is write down how the medication is making you feel physically and mentally and call the psychiatrist and tell them you feel like puking all the time, have low blood sugar and just don't want to eat. They will have a solution for you. They could even change lamictal to a mood stabilizer that doesn't have those side-effects if they feel it will not agree with you long term.
You have to be bloody honest with them about everything and that you took yourself off of lamictal and back on and hadn't followed instructions because it may affect your stability over all. I'm pretty sure the appetite issue is related and a side-effect of these kind of meds going on or off is that it does affect desire for food and can. Like I said your must tell them this ASAP and get your medication and levels all checked and adjusted. Stay on the medication unless they move you off of something as it can affect your safety and well-being.
Your blood sugar level being down is likely because of not eating normally and you should point out to the doctor that it is down and you cannot eat. It's possible they could give you something like Ranitidine or stronger meant to wipe out feeling nauseated so the feelings will go away and you can have your meals. Point it out to them and get it seen to. I'm confident you will be fine and wouldn't say that without going through this nearly two decades ago.
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I really do love my cat, but cleanliness to me is more important.
Ever since I got him from the SPCA I've been battling fleas wit him. They'll go away and come back and they FREAK ME OUT. I've spent so much money already on getting rid of them only for the next batch to be born a month later and have to do it all over again. I obsessively clean to make sure there aren't any, but one or two will always still survive.
I feel like I can't have a boyfriend because what if he slept over and a flea jumped on him??? That would be disgusting and he would think I was a dirty person.
Other than this I'm tired of his litter and always cleaning it out and how bad it smells every time he takes a poo. I bought candles that I burn all the time and a Glade scent sprayer thing and you can still smell his poop! It's so nasty! Also he tends to use the litter when people are over and then it's really embarrassing when they smell it. I clean the litter every day and use scented litter. I'm tired of the litter going everywhere even with an enclosed litter box and a litter mat. My bathroom looks gross all the time because he throws litter all over the place.
I also hate that his fur gets everywhere, especially on my dark clothes. I hate that he put his food in his water bowl for no reason. I hate that he tries to drink out of the toilet so I have to constantly put the lid down, which causes mildew.
I hate that he always finds ways to get to the food container and open it up even when he has fresh food in his bowl.
I'm moving into a new apartment soon where I'll have new roommates and have to share a bathroom and there's NO WAY I'm keeping his nasty litter in my bedroom where I'll smell it all the time.
I feel like I need to rehome him because I'm at my wits end.
Help! Who/Where can I give him to?
P.S. Please don't try to give me ways to cut down on the smell and other stuff, believe me I've tried EVERYTHING and it's just not possible.
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I think the problem lies with you to be blunt. You have this obsession with always being super clean. The burning of candles, using air freshener all the time to mask smell that may not even be as intense as you make it out to be.
None of your friends are complaining at all about the cat, his smell or the litter box and most have likely accepted that it's what cats do or haven't noticed the things you have. Whether you own a cat or a dog they'll end up shedding their coat and leaving fur. It may be a bother to clean up but it's part of owning one.
It seems to me that you aren't suited to own a cat or have the patience for it. That's okay some people aren't suited to own dogs either. Everything you mention not liking or not wanting when living with friends is par for the course when owning any kind of cat or dog. That's what you were getting into when you adopted the animal.
You have a choice to either learn how to live with and enjoy the cat you adopted or give him up to someone who is better suited to care for him and enjoy him in their home.
You have to understand that the older he is the more difficult to find him a forever home. He has likely been shuffled around a lot. I would hesitate to take him to the SPCA or a vet because they may put him down. I think what you have to do is deal with the obsession with being clean to the hilt and having more flexibility or find someone through a pet store, online, vet, rescue, humane society looking to adopt a cat. In all honesty I sense you haven't given the cat much of a chance.
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I have been cutting now for a while. Before you start hate typing please finish reading. I have had a series of my mothers boyfriends be abusive to me and my siblings since our dad left when I was about five (14 now) I have been moved all over the country several times for my mothers countless lovers and cutting seems like the only thing I have control over. But now it is getting a bit out of control any ideas on how to stop would be helpful. (link)
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The difficult part is over. You know you have a problem and have seen that because a lot of sufferers cannot see that. It's hypnotic and consumes them. There's a lot of negative thoughts and urges that come with this. You aren't crazy but this is indeed a mental-health issue and an illness that compels you to harm yourself.
You have to start from that place. Nobody is out to harm you but rather to help you. You need to consult your doctor privately and tell him/her you have a problem with cutting yourself and it's out of control and cannot stop. He or she will refer you to a psychiatrist who can figure out how depression and other illness fuels it and how to help you put this behind you and talk about issues that would bring it on.
Everything is 100% confidential and they cannot tell anyone what you have said in appointments unless there is a situation where they believe you may kill yourself or harm will come to you.
The most important thing you can do is tell people who you trust exactly what is going on and get them to listen and be a support network to you. Guidance counsellors, adults, teachers all will support you. Continue reaching out it's very important you do. They may have additional resources that could make you well.
What you do need is a professional which is what the psychiatrist is for to help you finally work out issues you otherwise suppress about your mom, the abuse etc etc. You have never let it out and worked with someone on healing and it's behind all this crap. It's coming to the surface to be dealt with and destroyed. Get it out there. It won't be easy but the sooner you try and get rid of it the sooner cutting will be in your rear-view mirror.
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Long story short, I met this guy not long ago well we were speaking everyday all day for around 4 months now and we finally met up, he seemed interested in me etc till the day we finally saw each other, but even then he still looked interested in me. Since Saturday he has been replying super late to my msgs, taking 2-6 hours to reply he wasn't like this I will come online on WhatsApp and I see him online but he doesn't even bother to open my msg , but he still replies the same way as before only this time he takes longer, why? all of a sudden after meeting me he changed the way he was towards texting, the time he takes messaging me back is doing my head in, did he lose interest? bare in mind we kissed on that day like he treated me really well.. its been different since Saturday? I feel like he's talking to another girl, I get this gut feeling??? why change all of a sudden?
its weird to give me late replies but still speak the same with me?? can someone please help me, I'm reading way too into these texts, I got so used to the routine of speaking to him constantly and since we saw eachother thats changed...??? did I do something ???? like his texts are still the same as before but he takes longer.. (link)
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Trust me there's no way anyone would kiss you if they didn't have interest and or love behind it. Saturday really is not that long in the grand scheme of things not to hear back from someone or as quickly as you would like. You have no idea the family commitments, school related ones, or life that he may have had this week.
The fact is he is answering you even if it takes a little longer for a reply. He's not blowing you off by any means and talks about the same stuff. Getting messages daily especially as the other advice givers have mentioned is unusual much less for 4 months.
The guy isn't The Flash and couldn't find another girl that fast. I think you need to relax, go about your business and not be obsessed with getting a message or sending them and being perceived as clingy.
The fact is you like him and arguably he likes you but you're just unsure and don't want to lose out or not be liked. You have this idea in your head that is nonsense about him not liking you after that kiss and meeting last weekend. Give him time.
If you like him discuss it with him in person and figure out where things stand. You'll likely be pleasantly surprised. The only other thing is maybe he's shy and thinking he screwed something up for all you know or aren't in to him. That could be it.
Often people are more reserved and nervous around each other before and after a date. Maybe he's not figured out what he wants either. Talk to him and get it off your mind or you'll drive yourself bonkers.
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I am 16 and have been babysitting my younger siblings/cousins for years. I want to start saving for college and just need money I enjoy babysitting and was looking for tips to start a business with one of my only skills thank you for reading this (link)
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You probably have a lot more skills than you give yourself credit for. Don't kid yourself you do. The most important thing a babysitter needs to get hired and for safety is a CPR course and one in life-saving and first aid. Libraries usually have these courses packaged in with one on babysitting or you can seek it out elsewhere.
The way to get noticed is to use library bulletin boards or boards in community centres to put your fliers up. If you have siblings who go to elementary or middle school place them there as well and see what happens. Be sure to also get references from parents of kids you have sat for in the past. Let them know your plans as word of mouth is essential.
Your parents may be able to help you get clients as can your relatives. See what develops and try to think of what would make a parents trust you and also what makes the service you offer different and get that across. If they can see you really are safe and the best one to leave their kids with you should do well.
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Um ok so for some reason I finger mysealf a lot when I am in bed is this weird thing to do?? I keep sticking my fingers up there. Please help!! (link)
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The short answer is that aside from being a weird teenager to begin with you're absolutely fine and this is normal at any age. It's a form of masturbation. Males, females, toddlers, infants all at some point at least do this once. Those who don't may be religious or not want to and that's fine too.
Masturbation need not be sexual at all. It can be done to ease stress, because it feels good or from boredom even. It's never sexual at all with children. Just like they discover all other parts of the body they discover private parts and what they do.
It is considered to be more prevelant in males that females with stats saying about 90% at all ages do and 77% of females. Honestly, I believe it's about equal for the simple reason that male genitals are external and that they use them to urniate and discover early what the penis does and how things feel. With girls the gentials are mostly hidden or internal. Also, males are more apt to talk to friends about it and females not. It's something we all do but don't admit. I would bet all your friends are but won't talk about it if asked.
This is incredibly healthy no matter the method and in males may help problems from developing later on with prostate through frequent ejaculation. The bottom line is that if you enjoy wha you are doing continue and if not stop and both are okay.
The other thing you have to know is that parents pretty much know this is universal with both sexes at this age to relive hormones and even if you have racy thoughts doing it that it's normal. They would be unphased. You may not be aware of this but likely as an infant, toddler or young child that you did this and they were well aware. It's no big deal either way.
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What is the difference between laziness and the inability to do something because of depression?
I am mildly depressed, and a lot of times, I just can't make myself do things. I often end up feeling really guilty for not doing things, and I feel like my mom thinks I'm just lazy.
Is there a difference? Am I just lazy? (link)
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There is a huge difference. Being lazy means you don't even try or take the easy way out and pardon the phrase half-ass things. Lazy implies not even trying and having a choice to do so or not. There's no desire or want to do anything.
When you have depression it can really kick your ass and is a medical issue where the medication and condition itself can cause you the inability to be able to do certain things despite a desire within you to do them. Your mother really is ill-informed about your condition and the side-effects of the drugs and how at times it can mean you cannot even attempt something. She needs to do some researching.
The thing is your levels of anti-depressants may be too high, too low and not where they ought to be causing this within you. You should see your doctor and mention it for he or she can make adjustments based on what you have told them and make you feel way less sluggish and give the ability to do a lot more that right now you can't. That could be the key to what is going on right there and how to fix it. Do that and be brutally honest with them about what life is like for you and how you are or not functioning near what you could be.
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So in high school I never really had that group of friends I would usually jump from group to group and never really had a best friend I mostly had acquaintances. However I'd like to say I hung out with certain groups of people more than others and would even hangout with them outside of school. So now that high school is done I don't see these people at all anymore and I've realized how I don't have any friends and that most of these people were only my friends because we saw each other everyday. I feel like it's my fault because I should've tried to develop a close relationship with these people cause now if I see a photo or a post of social media of these groups of people hanging out with each other I get sad because they didn't event think to invite me and when I ask if they're free they always say they're busy. I'm always the one to text these people first and if I don't text them at all I won't hear from them. I've tried so hard to make new friends at my new school but if you've seen my previous posts you'd know the friends I made were either fake or just acquaintances who just came for lecture and don't want anything outside of class. Please help with tips on either how to get these old friends to remember I exist or how to make new friends? Cause being shy literally ruins everything thanks in advance (link)
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I would leave those people from the past behind and move on. They aren't making any effort to be a friend to you and actually are and have treated you like shit. You deserve better and will find it. I think it would be highly beneficial for you to find a therapist you can trust and work through this, learn better social skills, how to accept and love yourself because people may be avoiding you because you're wrapped up in yourself and withdrawn. They may not "get you" but someone will and that's the person who will come to you first.
People can see a mile away that you are awkward and not confident and don't know how to proceeed or get to know you. If you work with a therapist you can overtime become less introverted.
Also, find somewhere that teaches improv classes be it parks and rec or a studio and take that to develop your social skills and work with a variety of different people and see if that yields friends and helps you. Some places have classes specifically for anxiety and or mental health difficulties too. It forces you to work together.
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so ive had multiple bouts of bronchitis all year last year and here I am sick again...yellow, green and red phlegm is coming out ....should I go too the ER for a chest x-ray or the DR's office where there are no x-ray machines there? my dr told me before if I get bronchitis again, go too the ER for a full chest x-ray to make sure I don't have walking pneumonia.
what should I do? (link)
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Follow what the doctor told you to do and go directly to the ER and rule out pneumonia and other causes. I have been there. Failure to do so can be detrimental to your health. If it is Pneumonia the longer you wait to find out the bigger danger you can place yourself in with it not responding to anti-biotics or you needing to be in hospital. Yellow, green or red phlegm coming out just isn't normal and actually a warning sign. Definitely go to the ER.
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Does a bloke ever compliments a woman in a way like, you're very generous, how kind of you, you're beautiful, you're a good girl? Sometimes, it's bit too much, I guess. I don't give him much compliment but he does everytime we see each other. Or is he after something? I reckon I like him, at least a little. Known for a few months and we got to know each other. He's a nice man and became friends. Thank you everyone (link)
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I would put my money down on him liking you. There's being courteous and friendly to people and then there is overdoing it hoping you notice it. He may think this is flirting and how it works but have zero skills if you will to know that it's a turnoff and backfiring.
Unless you talk to him and point it out that he doesn't need to do that to get a girl to notice him he will keep at it. He is harmless and genuinely likes you and just wants a date. You have to figure out how you feel one way or the other and let him know how you feel about the constant comments as clearly something is behind them. If he's got you uncomfortable he needs to know and especially people you work with if that's the enviornment. Otherwise if you don't mind and actually do like him it's a possible thing to explore.
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well i been heartbroken over this guy named josiah for 4-5 years, we were close and almost dated. he led me on and used me til didnt need me anymore, and is my first love, kiss who lost virginity to etc. we ent from talking alot flirting etc to all sudden it stopped. idk why still, and foundout from someone that is married now. i tried sending a friend request on facebook, playing it off as dont have these feelings still, but denied request but didnt block. want talk to him so badly, as did have a miscarriage of his child and never griefed properly as kept it from my family cause they lecture me about having feelings for him tho thats not something i can help , tried everything i could think of to move on, and now in a relationship with lance, who treats me like queen do care for just not as much as do josiah. he knows had thing for him in past, as told him how he hurted me badly emotionally dont think it was intentional tho cuase he's best guy i ever knew before lance. what should i do? and want make my current relationship work though im just settling for lance since cannot have josiah like we were... (link)
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It's been something you haven't been able to let go of for a long time even though he's become married to someone else. He sees you as the past and doesn't have any interest. He ignored your Facebook request hoping you would move along. He likely won't talk to you again
While it's not wrong to reach out to people it is if it's been this long, you know they are married and trying to tell yourself it wasn't because you still have feelings, You need to see a therapist because this isn't normal behavior at this point. Most people can move past this quickly but for years you have held on to this whereas you are a distant memory to him. For some reason you think you still have a chance or can pick up some form of relationship from him, Be honest..
I don't know what you think will happen if you try talking to this person either.. Why must you so badly? You're in a relationship now and bound to end up hurting yourself and the other person if you allow your past relationship and these feelings to invade your present.
You need to talk with a therapist and work through all of these issues and how you feel about your current relationship because the other person has moved on and you are to have been expected to by now.
You can't make this person come back to you, love you or make it the way it once was expecially if he is married and has moved on in life. That's not reality and nothing would give you that. There's nothing you can do to change this fact. I think that's what you are unable to grasp and it is a problem.
The guy was hoping you would move on and didn't block you out of being nice and or wanted to monitor what you were doing in trying to reach him and motivation why. You didn't do anything inappropriate or abusive yet so blocking you wasn't necessary unless you wouldn't leave him alone. But yes, you have to chuck these feelings for him and learn how to finally move forward. If you can't do it alone therapy will help.
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25/f. I have been dating a guy for about 2 years and we have had a wonderful, beautiful relationship. Yesterday he asked me for a loan and it really really hurt me. I have never had a single friend in my whole life... up until him, the only people who were ever willing to spend time and get to know me were paid to do so. (Teachers, therapists, etc) I am quite well-off, my parents give me full financial support and folks I know have frequently asked me for money for this and that. It always makes me feel so worthless, like I'm an ATM machine or something. I really hoped that Eric would be different and it just makes me really really sad and disappointed. Should I just leave him now?
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What did he ask you for a loan for? If it was for school or something to better his life and he showed no signs of bolting than perhaps I could see you helping him or if he needed rent or something along those lines. However, if it's something you feel is trivial or that he's using you than trust your gut. You could ask for collateral.
You should be direct with him and tell him a whole bunch of people are asking you for money all the time because they know you have it and that their reasons aren't right. Tell him that you don't provide money to anyone because you never know if it will be returned. If he balks at that then the relationship was never really strong. Let him know it hurts you that he asked and that it greatly disappoints you.
You could tell him how you felt and then evaluate where the relationship is going for he may be able to accept a firm NO and keep things the way they are. If he isn't happy than maybe this experience is saving you from greater misery with him. Things occur for a reason especially if they're uncomfortable.
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What does it mean? (link)
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It means that they don't adhere to any one doctrine or organized religion. For example someone could follow the teachings of Jesus and NOT be Christian, catholic or whatever sect. They could definitely be spiritually aware and learning from many different teachings and religions but not pinned down to any label or core set of beliefs. It means they practice these things but don't need a religion or want to be affiliated with one.
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Ok so i own a Siberian Husky pup he is almost 1 year old he is a great dog love him till death. He listens when inside the house great but i feel like its only because he feels like he is trapped. As soon as i let him outside he no longer listens and if he does something bad and i have to punish him i put him in a cage in the house then it takes me a week just to get his trust back he will not come when called will not drop a item when told to do so. And Like i said this is only once we leave the house when we are out doors or in the backyard of the house. He is fast a short 50 pound little ball of fire always on the move he has a huge backyard to play in and i try to get him to the dog park at least twice a week depending on the weather. I train with him everyday but he does not seem to get it he is very hesitant when i call him to me in the backyard and does not even acknowledge my presence at the dog park. He will be bad picking on a puppy at the dog park then we get home and he jumps up on the coach with me like were best friends and i am not mad at him. He knows i am the Alpha again great in the house wont touch food dropped on the floor until told to do so sits when told to even knows when i get him in the house and he was bad he knows to go into his crate. I tried looking everywhere online and everyone says the same thing just practice in your backyard bring him out on a leash i have tried it all as soon as he gets a inch freedom he takes a lot more then a mile. If anyone has advice i really appreciate it also food does not interest him i don't know if i already said that but if anyone knows like a irresistible dog treat that would also be great (link)
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You need to get an expert on dog training to help you with him. Ask your vet for a reference and have him go to puppy school. When you are outside he thinks he's the boss. You have to learn how to be assertive and correct his behavior not only at home but in public. A trainer that knows what he's doing and can teach you what you need to know is paramount and can shape his behavior going forward. it may cost a bit but it's worth it over all for both of you.
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I'm 21 and usually 85 pound or a little less, but 4ft 10in.
I've always looked different because of how short I am and I'm also pale. Instead of ever being called hot or sexy I've always been called "cute"or "pretty", or told that look like a doll. To be honest it kind of gets to me. I always feel ugly because I'm surrounded by tall blonde bombshell types even though people tell me I'm pretty all the time. I also feel like every time I see a photo of myself I look fugly because people take bad photos of me at weird angles. Meanwhile my friends always look perfect in photos! I think this also affects how I feel about myself.
It makes me feel better to be skinny. I figure at least I have that going for me. My father and my friends have always talked about how ugly they perceive overweight people to be so I always try to be skinny.
Recently my new doctor told me she wanted to see me gain 10 pounds by my next appointment with her and that I needed to be at least 100 eventually. I refuse to do this, because I actually want to be skinnier. Right now I can't see my ribs and I want to be able to so I'm kind of trying to lose weight. At the same time though I love food and I typically eat twice a day and then a snack or two. This week I've been sick with the flu and I keep throwing up, but I'm kind of happy that I'm throwing up and get a little disappointed when I don't see a lot of regurgitated food because my body absorbed the rest already. I also want to say that I'm not throwing up on purpose, it's just because I'm sick and I would never make myself throw up on purpose.
I've recently told two people I was trying to lose weight and they didn't even flinch. I was kind of hoping they would tell me I shouldn't and now I feel like I do need to lose weight until people do tell me I shouldn't. On top of this a month or two back I had a guy grab my stomach while I was a little bloated (from pms) and tell me that I could lose that weight. He was laughing about it, but it made me want to do just that. I stopped being friends with him, but I still think about it all the time. I also think about how when I sit there's a little overlap flab of skin. I want that to go away and I don't want a little pouch at all when I lay down or stand up.
I'm feeling extremely self conscious and hoping that being sick takes some pounds off of me. If it doesn't I think I'm going to try something that does. I don't think I have an eating disorder though? I'm not anorexic or bulimic because I love eating food and hate the feeling of throwing up. I kind of want to be 75 pounds, maybe 70 but that still seems like a lot...
I just want to feel pretty. (link)
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A doctor is the only person who can make any kind of medical diagnosis about you including an eating disorder. If we so much as guessed at that and were wrong it would be harmful and of tremendous disservice to you.
That said, you and I both know that what you are doing is extremely self-destructive and harmful to you now and potentially long-term. You know it isn't right or you would not have written in looking for guidance. It's good you can recognize this as NOT your thinking and as a negative belief and view of who you are.
Throwing up to be thin or doing everything you think you need to while underweight and in general is of big concern and must be shared with the doctor no matter what or you won't get better and may put yourself in potentially life-threatening circumstances if it continues. You need to be honest and ask and accept help from her and with your family too.
What you really need is a psychiatrist NOT a therapist that this doctor can refer you to. You need to discuss with them the reasons for all of this behavior and learn to love yourself, purge the negativity not the food and live your life free of this issue. The sooner you do this the better.
Your doctor knows you are underweight or he/she wouldn't have told you you need to gain weight to be healthy. You ahbve to level with them and tell them exactly what you told us and seek help as right now you are headed for trouble but still have time to fix this before it becomes a huge problem which it seems headed if you don't act.
As far as people who are slightly overweight or have a little baby fat it's fine. You have to stop looking at yourself through a dirty window pane or you'll see distortion where there is beauty in and out. So what if other people think it's ugly? That;s where they are at and you don't have to accept their view about yourself or anyone. Consider the source and their ignorance.
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We got a female pitbull puppy yesterday and i have 3 other dogs. Two sausage dogs and one husky. My one sausage dog cant stand her. He is very stiff and he used to be a very loving dog until we got the pitbull. He nibbles her ears but and keeps wanting to bite her. Hes bit her hard 3 or 4 times now therest are just snapping at her. How do we stop this and get him to be back to how he was? I dont want my dog to feel neglected or anything.
Also the puppy is teething socit bites everyone. How do we stop it from biting our dogs because they will bite her back? (link)
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As someone whose dog had litter of pups I can assure you snapping or growling is actually normal and a way of the older dogs trying to tell the puppy where its place is and that they're pissed with its antics. When you see them getting more aggressive with her tell them "NO" sternly and separate them from her and give them some alone time. It's all about territory, hierarchy and place. They feel their's has been encroached upon. Supervise them and expose them to one another gradually until they see they all belong. Believe me there's jealousy there too.
I would also consult your vet and explain the problem that your sausage dog is overly aggressive towards the puppy and get tips you can use along with the above advice. As for the teething and biting again ask the vet but make sure any time they try to be aggressive with the pup that a stern "NO" and consequence is given and they will get it.
There's going to be a power struggle believe me between these dogs for one of them to be top dog. That part is normal dog behavior. While it's not happening here mother dog will trounce pups first couple of weeks of life to teach them to defend themselves and proper footwork. It's neat.
It sounds like you are having the normal problems most people have when introducing a new pet to pre-existing ones as they have long ago figured out among themselves where there place is with themselves and you and that this new dog is a nuisance or threat to that and them until taught otherwise by you. Good luck.
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Hi, been friends for a few months and we banter well. Feels like he fancies me and we get on ok. Caught him frequently looking at me and when I look at him he holds his eye contact with a slight smile but we always carry on with our conversation. In our late 20's. When I make jokes, not everyone is cute like you are, he says (Let's say my name is Beth) he says, Beth is Beth, isn't it? What's he up to?? Trying to say something?? Tried to ask him directly but couldn't dare even though we're mates. Thank you! (link)
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If you have been friends for a long time than this ought to be easier than you think it is. You should be able to say damn near anything to one another at this point. Tell him that you have noticed some behavior in him that can easily be misconstrued as flirting and that you needed to know for certain if he is or not. Tell him regardless that nothing changes with your friendship and find out for sure or it will drive you bonkers until you do.
I'm a guy and I can tell you that we don't smile awkwardly at girls and look away when caught if we're only friends and haven't interest. The joking and trying to get attention or say something and then not suggests he is interested but flustered.
You guys are in your twenties but behaving like 12-year-olds. It's cute for teens to be doing this but as adults you need to grab bull by horns and talk about this elephant in the room and get a relationship started or be friends and know for sure what all this means. It may result in a lot of good and even if not at least you'll know and can carry on after.
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