Imperfectionist's advice column

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Q: I wanna know different ways to make my boyfriend really horny and how to do it. I don't want to embarass myself by trying to hard or not doing something enough. Help?

each guy is different on what makes him hard, stick to the things he likes and what you know turns him on. Tease him a bit.

Q: im having a party and i only invited some of my friends but i dint invite my other friends because of the way they act i dont know what to do if they get mad that i dint invite them ?? what should i say to them if they ask me why i didnt invite them???

honestly, it's not right that you aren't inviting them. please put yourself in other's shoes before making these decisions. how would you feel if you found out your friend had a party and when you ask them, "hey why didn't you tell me or even invite me", they told you it was because how you act? That would most likely hurt your feelings the same way you are going to hurt your friends'

Q: How can I stop my peroid for a short time?

Uhm... you can't really control when your period comes and goes. You can go on birth control though to monitor to a certain time period each month, some birth controls can even have you have your period once every three months.

Q: I have a friend named Jarmond. I found out he likes me about a month or two ago. He won't stop calling me. Texting me. Telling me he loves me. Talking bad about my boyfriend. Saying how much he wants to kiss me and be with me. Always tries to hang out. Touches me all the time. Ect. What can I say to him to give him the hint that I do NOT like him nor wanna be with him. He's starting stuff with me and my boyfriend trying to brake us up and I'm very annoyed!! Help!

To get straight to the point that guy IS NOT YOUR FRIEND. especially because if he loved and cared about you he wouldnt go out of his way to break up you and your boyfriend. Someone who cares about you WANTS you happy. Tell him straight up you don't like him and end your friendship because he is unneeded drama, sweetie.

Q: My boyfriend wants to have sex with me but i am not ready, yet i do not want to loose him.

If your boyfriend is not willing to wait for you to be honest he does not care about how you feel and is only looking out for himself. Don't give in, i guarantee you'll end up in a relationship where your thoughts are NEVER considered.

Q: so i enjoy helping people actually i love helping people or at least trying to. i give them the advice and some of the peoples questions i have given advice has ritten back to me. can you tell me how can i respond back to them like i sapose u would say conversatio? i feel bad because there asking me this on the rate thing and idk how to respond to them. thanks for the help :)

actually what mercury said is incorrect. You are asking how to reply to their comments on the feedback am i correct? im pretty sure you can't respond from that but you can always just go to back to the question and click answer question as an answer to what they said, by saying simply... "to what you said in my feed back comment section... blah blah" and such

Q: Well last night, I just had gotten to the very end of my menstrual cycle, where the blood is very very light and it is mostly just residue. I was feeling turned on all day, so I decided to have sex. I was a bit skeptical at first, but I knew my period was ending after five days of being on it. My boyfriend did not ejaculate because we were being safe and used a condom as well. Even though we practiced safe sex, I am a bit worried. I woke up and I felt blood again, so I put in a tampon and felt kind of scared. I feel a little stupid, but I am trying not to get stressed out. I'm pretty sure I won't get any sign of pregnancy, but I'd like to be reassured...

girl your fine, and don't feel stupid. i know exactly how you feel. Alot of people during their period get extremely horny, myself included. and want to have sex RIGHT AFTER they think its over. But if you would like to be reassured there is always a pregnancy test.

Q: First off I'm in the navy and I'm 20 years old. Me and my fiance have.dated for about 8 months. At the beggining I didn't get off until she did like 2 times. Now honestly minus foreplay I don't last but about 7-8 minutes of straight going at it. Why is this?

Now i don't know if you are a guy or a girl so i'm not going to spit statistics at you like the other guy did. BUT... i will tell you, the whole staying horny thing is great. I mean who doesn't want a lover that lasts. BUT maybe look into what makes her finish and what makes you finish coordinate it. Then maybe you can even finish at the same time.

Q: should i be single because i relly like a lot of guys n i think who should i be wirhth. there is this one guy tht i like n i am kind of shy to talk to him and when he tries to talk to me my heart like feels lie its racing a cheetah. when i try to talk to him i ct nd say the dumbest nd stupidest thinf ever. i lso think that he likes me. but when a girl he like passes by him he says oh i would like one of those girls fhen he looks up at me. i woundee why he is cting like this should i just keep tring my best or ahould i just move on or stay single because i have been single for a while. wht should i do?

uhm... im not trying to be mean or anything but i don't fully understand this question because you're grammar is just utterly horrible and your spelling completely confuses me. But i think what you said is you like some guy and you like alot of guys... and something about... never mind. I give up. Properly phrase this, and then reupload it.

Q: So i really like this guy! He is amazing in every way possible! He's amazingly sweet and sooo cute!!! And I've never felt this way before.. He makes me feel alive and happy that none of my past relationships have worked! We have been together about a month.. and every time i kiss him i just fall harder. I don't know if i really love him or is just the fact i am 1 and in love with the thought of being in love??

you are one? that's a bit young to even be typing xD. anyway. im guessing your probably under 16+ from your spelling and grammar and plainly because of the way you put it. Sweetheart, you are probably WAY too young to even understand what love is and unfortunately you may just never have a good relationship so now that you have one, this is what you think love is.

Q: well basically, i really want a baby because ive been thinking alot about it and i just think its time for me to have a baby. Ive said to my partner but he said he doesnt think we are ready until he gets a full time job.. and a car even though he has a licence. I know i dont have a full time job at the minute as im in full time education but i really do want a baby, what should i do?

I have to agree with your partner on waiting. It doesn't matter if you want a baby, you need your partner to want it too. AND you need to have it all set up before then. Him wanting a full time job and a car before having a baby means you got a smart guy on board. Because to have a baby... (which is expensive as hell now adays) you're going to need money and not just welfare and food stamps honey. And also your going to need transportation. So... listen to your partner and wait.

Q: If a female is sick can she get her partner sick from giving him oral sex?

It's possible.

Q: I occasionally masturbate but every time I am about to climax I start having thoughts about how shallow it is. I don't try to have these I just do and I lose it. It's getting kind of annoying and have tried many different masturbating techniques but none have worked. Is there a way to fix this? Thanks.

Hahaha. It's actually funny reading this because i wasn't into the whole masturbating thing because it seemed lonely and just kinda wierd. But actually it's a very good stress reliever apparently from what i'm told and it helps you even figure out what makes you climax. AND a even better bonus is a good way to release those hormones that make you feel good. So stop thinking its shallow because if anything most shallow people don't do it because they think they are too good for it.

Q: Im 18 & I started seeing someone. Me & my parents told him no sex. I have never had any type of intercourse before cause I wanted to wait till marriage so my parents told him that. Please dont laugh but Id not heard of fingering before. Does that count as losing virginity if he did it 4 different times? He told me it was ok so I let him do it. This was only our first date. I started bleeding & he said it was okay. I told my mum when I got home and she was angry he did that. His fingers still went in my vagina goes so does that mean Im not one anymore? Im so stupid to have listened to him. After this happened I keep getting panic attacks and now they cant stop. Pleae help me.

Well you can tear your hymen through fingering but you did lose your virginity technically you are a virgin until his penis goes into your vagina.

Q: Ok there's a guy I know (through my friends boyfriend) who I really like. We've known eachother for about a year but have usually just said hi. Recently we've spoke more, just casual messages on facebook whenever we're both online.

My friends boyfriend said to me at his party 'I hope you're going to talk to him' I said why? He said 'because he likes you but he's not good at talking to girls he likes'

Any way we did talk, we got along really well, kissed at the end of the night etc. We've text since then, but I always text him first. He seems happy to talk back to me, asks questions, flirts and was talking about the last time he fell in love. I feel like I'm annoying him when I text him, and also nervous for some reason! Do you think I should continue texting him? Do you think he seems shy? Do you think he likes me?

Like his friend said he isn't good at talking to girls he likes... which means of course he probably isn't that good at texting first... that and some guys just don't like texting. Maybe you should try calling him one day, and hang out some more. And he obviously likes you... seeing as you kissed, am i correct?

Q: hi guys, im a girl and i am wondering about tattoo ideas. i want either a skinny design going up the side of my stomach or a quote. does anyone have a really beautiful, or outstanding quote. i live by the quote "Live Laugh Love" but i really dont want that to get tattooed to myself because it deffinitly not original. thankyou so much! =]

how about getting those words tattooed on you in a different language maybe in chinese symbols? Because a tattoo should mean something to you, i mean it's going to be on your body FOREVER. And that quote does mean something to you. So why not?

Q: Hi!I'd like somebody to help me on this,I have a boyfriend and I love him very much,but a couple of days ago I met this incredibly cute guy on a bus on my way to the doctor,well we started to talk and that was just it,I'm such a fool 'cause I gave him my phone number so he has been calling me several times,I don't know how to get rid of him,my partner still doesn't know anything about it of course,it'd hurt him so much,you know,well I know you may think that I like this other guy,well...I do:(,but at the same time I do know that it's not correct,I love my boyfriend a lot,and I wouldn't like to fall for any other guy,I'm so confused,I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO,KISS!

If you loved your boyfriend, to be brutally honest you would be going around thinking "hey that guy is cute so i'll give him my number" and then not only that but you actually did talk to him. No offense but did you think about how your boyfriend will feel? I mean how would you feel if the guy you apparently "love" so much saw some girl that he thought was hot and decided to give her his number and started texting her all the time? I bet... you wouldn't feel great. You need to tell the guy you have a boyfriend, and probably tell your boyfriend. Expect either a fight or you getting dumped.

Q: Lately I'm really into my male coworker. We talk at work alot and I know the usual signs for when a guy is into you but it makes me feel neurotic thinking about it haha. But, in general hell start conversations with me and kinda always be next to me throughout our shift. We have slightly proactive conversations but they aren't ever truly serious and always in good fun. I.e. we were chatting about how he usually doesn't talk to girls like that and I said it's cause I'm like a bro (guys girl) and he said "aww no don't say that. I'd hit it haha" And he also tells me that he likes talking/working with me and that I'm easy to talk to. He also remembers things about me that I've forgotten that I've told him. Overall I get the feeling he's into me, but I don't want to assume he does, when he only wants to have sex or just be friends. Any input/feedback?

Honestly, i'd avoid a workplace romance because it's kinda like high school romances where if anything awkward or bad happens your still going to have to see them all the time.
BUT
because i'm sure he is aware of that too... maybe you should see if he likes you.
Maybe just hang out AS FRIENDS outside of work one day.

Q: what makes my bf get a boner when fingering me when most boys that finger thier girlfriends while making out don't?

xD uhmmmm hm. Well what gives an erection is different for each guy. It all depends on what turns HIM on. It could be the wetness of your vagina that turns him on. It could be knowing he pleasures you. Or he might just have a fingering girls fetish. Either way, don't worry about it. It's a good thing. And you're getting something out of it ;)

Q: Hi, I'm 14/f and there is a boy I like and I'm not sure if he likes me back...

When we're alone, he would be sweet, flirty & giggly (& a little sexual which is just him kidding... I think) but in front of people he'd be not exactly mean, but he wouldn't look at me or talk to me like he does when we're alone. He won't make fun of me but he'd scoot away as if I did something wrong. He'd ignore me when I call his name, & I don't want to annoy him so I just move away when his friends come in and smile at him :) I can tell by the look on his face and his eyes that he doesn't want me to move away but he doesn't say anything, in fear that he will be made fun of again. Isn't that so cute?

People also make fun of us a lot because I usually go over and sit next to him in class and he would be flirting and all that and his friends would come in and be like "awe you guys are so cute together, you'd make a cute couple" then I'd blush and look away. But on the other hand, he'd not be so happy about it. He just completely shut down. The smile goes away from his face, he won't look at me, & all I do is just move away because he gets mad after a while (but I'm not sure because there was this one time when he was mad when he came into class & then his friends started to make fun of us was when he got mad, so I'm not really sure if he was mad at me at first, (if any of this even makes sense)) and the last thing I want is for him to be mad at me.

I have been thinking about putting a cute little note in his locker, and I know what I want to say (in general) I just don't know exactly how to say it. I want to ask him to wait for me so we can talk after school, but I don't know exactly how to word it. Just in case you were wondering what I wanted to talk to him about, I wanted to ask him why he was doing this. Is this a bad idea?

Should this be a red flag?
What does it mean when a guy does this?
Is it possible that he likes me?
How should I word my note?
If I shouldn't do the note at all, how should I approach him about it?

Thank you all in advance!

He probably is a good guy in all but how he is treating you is ass. It's kinda like he is embarrassed to like you or is hiding it. Sit him down and ask him about it, because a guy who likes you would want to claim you as his. And he is doing the exact opposite.

bio

Hi, thanks for coming to my column.

The name is Diamond but Dia is fine.

20, female, jersey girl at heart. mixed race taurus natured woman.

So...the reason I made this was during the start of my senior year of high school I had reached a point in my life where I didn't want to live anymore. I was tired of fighting and didn't see the reasons to fight. It was a random stranger that made me realize I would be stupid to take my life and to stop fighting.

So if you think I'm going to tell you life gets easier, I'm not. Let's face it, it doesn't get easier. Through pain you get stronger and learn to open your eyes to those things that give you strength to live.

Mine happen to be music, writing, dr. pepper, anime, the color black, the way rain sounds, and an amazing boyfriend. What gives you strength to live?