I aim to give you solid advice on your problems. I don't sugarcoat things and I'm always straight up. Don't come asking for what you want to hear as I always give the truth even if you don't want it because it's what you need and the only way to grow.
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Member Since: December 31, 2006
Answers: 3591
Last Update: August 30, 2022
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Why does my boyfriend always want anal sex even though he knows how much I dislike it and it turns me off and I'm crying but he still continues and even gets off (link)
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It's your body and if you don't want to do something than don't. If he can't handle that tell him to take a hike. He sounds like a prick (excuse my word choice) who only cares about what he wants. If he cared about you at all he would stop if he saw you crying. Is he worth staying with? Probably not. If he can't understand no or your stance on this than it's time to move on.
Someone like that is someone to be well clear of. There's no genuine concern or love there. It's not right that he knows where you stand and keeps trying to push things. It shows exactly where his mentality is and how he views you. Let him know that he's on thin ice and that if he doesn't get the word NO to move on and find someone else because you're done.
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What would I do when I like someone that have a boyfriend? At the same I’m dating someone
(link)
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Wait! See if the relationship he's in runs it course. Telling him how you feel could bring on wrath especially from her. In the meantime build up a solid friendship of which something could be built upon later. If you are dating someone and aren't interested in them anymore be direct about it and tell them it's not working. Don't string them along further if your heart is not in the relationship.
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I am sure in your minds you are thinking why I want to stay angry at someone well I will tell u why
I like this boys in my class everyone now knows I like him because a couple of friends and I went to the movies and they made us sit together because some of them said he liked me I didn't believe them thought while others told him I liked him anyway we were siting together and we started cuddling up and my friends started taking pics I begged them not to tell anyone but one of the posted the pic on there statue so now everyone knows about us.
Anyway well a couple of days ago a friend of mine told me he liked me. since I liked someone else I told him I didn't like him that way but he still didn't give up he told me he was going to kiss me I told him not to but he tod me he was still going to do it anyway let us pretend that my crush is boy A and my friend id boy B
A lot of my classmate say me and my crush are dating which is not true and he still hasn't told me he likes me so I am bit confused but I think he knows I like him because he always makes fun of me for blushing but I also catch him looking at me.
Anyway boy B told boy A he was going to kiss me but instead of boy A to react he told boy B that he would pay him money to kiss me which really hurt my feelings and I told boy A I was mad at him but I keep blushing and playing with him and he is so cute and I can't stay mad at him. so boy A told me I cant stay mad at him which is true even though he apologised I want to stay mad at him because he hurt my feelings and he told me I can't stay mad at him I want to prove him wrong and make him beg for my forgiveness. (link)
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Anger is like drinking poision and bathing in it multiple times a day. It is self-destructive and will only physically and mentally harm the person who is angry and worse holding on to it. It can even destroy a person depending what they're holding on to and for how long. You can be angry all you want at someone but it's always YOU not your target that suffers. Let it go because it's not worth it.
What happened wasn't right but it's typical of adolescent boys. You can't let it bother you and in fact it may be good you found out what he was saying about money and not really liking you. This way you don't get involved with him or his friend. You won't have your feelings hurt further. You know what the deal is with them both. You shouldn't have a part of them really.
Instead of being angry you should calmly tell them that what they did to you or said about you and money etc was disgusting which it is and that you don't want anything more to do with either one of them. Then just drop the issue and go on about your life and don't look back.
Like I said there's ZERO point other than harming yourself by taking that figurative drink of posion or bathing in it over and over by wanting someone else to beg for forgiveness etc. It will do a real number on you and not so much him. I know what he did hurt you but you must hold your head high and know that that's who they are and you don't need the drama. There's no point holding on to this stuff at all. The sooner you let it go the happier you're going to become.
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I Have been having self-destructive behaviors for the longest time, now I have really hit an all-time low in my life with these self-destructive behaviors. I relapsed recently and having cutting my wrist and now it's spreading to my stomach, legs, and upper arms. It is becoming a daily struggle to keep them hidden from people I do NOT want anyone to see them at all. My eating habits are horrendous..My appetite will disappear a lot, in the morning I don't eat go to school with saltines eat some and that is the meal of the day, it is something I do without realizing how bad it is and how it is ruining my body... I'm really at this point of, If a person hit me with their car I would be so thankful, As I'm walking around school or even laying down in my bed I fantasize about just dying, I think death as something peaceful and calming just being able to slip away into a forever sleep. I have a list of plans and dates and ideas, it to me makes me feel better. Part of me wants a successful career but it so far away from my reach that I will never be able to attain it. The only thing that is keeping me alive is my sister, I force myself to hold on painfully every day because of her.
I have been lying a lot more, to everyone and including myself. When my mother suspects that I am cutting, I seemingly lie on cue. This is so crazy to me now because in my whole life lying goes against my ethics and morals as a person, something would never do. I am scared of myself, I can lie, and do horrendous things, I can't recognize myself anymore. I truly hate myself and self-hatred is rooted in me. Everyone says I'm getting better but when I look at my bloody piece of glass and look at cars in the street on the highway and think how fast I need to jump in front of it and when the day comes to make sure I got all my school work done, is when I realize I'm not getting better, I am slowly deteriorating. nothing matters. I really don't. even if someone makes me feel guilty like " What about your family?" it flys over my head and it doesn't help on a bit. I feel like I got 6-8 weeks left before I descend from this earth, I am just at my limit. I don't want to be here anymore. For years I have been suffering and I am done ignoring this feeling of dying, comparing myself to others and their's being worst, I am being selfish for once, I think about everyone else, When I really think about my self, this is what I think. (link)
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You are in crisis and it's good that you know this as a lot of people with mental illness cannot see it until it's made crystal clear when hospitalized. The number one thing you have to know is that the dark thoughts and feelings of suicide aren't normal. Those thoughts are not you they are a manifestation of an illness that is running the show right now.
With professional help you can silence those voices, overcome the illness and live a normal life or a much better one than you have now. It starts with stopping the lies. As hard as it may be you need to tell someone you trust immediately what you are feeling and thinking and show them the cuts, scars etc and clue them in on what is going on. It's the only way to become well.
Next even though you don't want to be there you have to go to a hospital ER and tell them these things and allow them to treat you. They may want to observe you for 72 hrs. That's normal. They'll figure out how to treat you and will know why prior treatment may not have worked. In the event you need to be there longer consider it as a rest period where all the pressures and outside world cannot get at you. You'll have access of course to family during that time.
It may take a while and some work but over time you will emerge from this a very strong person and can resume life or have one that's better than you ever imagined by following treatment. Who says you can't have the career you want? It has NOTHING to do with age or what may be happening now. If you have a goal and passion and press forward in pursuit of it you can do anything or something even better can happen.
Do the right thing and tell someone you trust what is going on and visit the hospital so their mental health team can get to the bottom of it, diagnose it correctly and start helping you overcome what's going on. All of it is survivable and manageable and you definetly don't have to die in 6-8 weeks or ever to attain the peace, joy and things you are longing for.
Know one thing no matter what that you are valuable and important to other people and have a purpose greater than you realize that will come into focus in do time but you need to get help now.
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What do I do with a dad who is verbally and sometimes physically abusive? He's threatening to take me out of the only school that's ever made me happy and he already took me out of all of my extracurricular activities (link)
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You have to understand that his behavior is repulsive and wrong. You are not the one causing it nor the fault of it. Do you know what is likely triggering it? Does he drink? Is there a mental illness or physical problem?
I think it's in your best interest to tell an adult you trust what is happening. Let them know that he's verbally abusive out of the blue and hits you whenever the mood strikes him. Let that adult be it a teacher, counselor, doctor, family friend or relative in on the truth and they'll find ways to handle your father and see that you both get help. It takes courage but you need to make this known as he will get worse.
As far as your schooling goes make it known to your teachers his threats to remove you from there and that he's forced you to drop every single one of your after school activities they are professionals who will know who to get involved to clear up this situation.
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What should I do to have high grades (link)
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Ask lots of questions in class especially if struggling to understand. It's how you will learn and improve. A large chunk of your grade is for participation and easy to get. If you don't understand something ask the teacher to break it down.
Also consider forming or joining a study group with other students and learn and re-learn material that way. Ask for any and all extra help you can get from the teacher. Keep accurate notes and photo copy any notes that are better from classmates you know grasp the material better than you do.
You could spend an hour or two daily on your own going over notes and your textbooks reviewing things you have learned on your own to keep them in your head constantly. Study as though you would for a test and break thing down unit by unit. Don't try to cram it all in at once. A bit here and there works.
Also, you need to relax and realize that as long as you are trying as hard as you can and doing all that you can that it's all you can do. The grades will reflect it. When it comes to college high grades are good to have but not the be all and end all. They're really interested in you having great grades in subjects related to the field you want to study. You can always point out to them if something was a weakness and or you needed special help to get through.
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There is a guy that I have met at least twice, but he can’t remember my name. At first, I thought maybe I didn’t look familiar. He’ll shake my hand and than ask me my name. He done this twice. Why does he keep forgetting my name. (link)
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It's hard to tell and only he could give you a real reason. My hunch is it's not a slight against you. He may meet a ton of people like we all do daily. Because he's only met you once or twice your name isn't in his brain yet.
As you see him more often or include him you'll find he probably will know your face and name eventually. He could simply be the type of person that is so frazzled that remembering things aren't easy. If he does it over and over past 3-4 times than I would ask him why he forgets who you are or move on if you think he's not worst wasting time on.
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I need help, so I’m auditioning for a girl group but the choreography is way too hard. What I really want to do is write, act, and direct and that’s been my passion since elementary. I love the idea of being in a girl group but the work is a lot. Should I just stick to my passion and focus on writing or should I continue to dance? (link)
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Continue to dance provided you in fact enjoy it. Realize that although you like the idea of belonging to a group and creating with one that right now this particular group is a bad fit. You're skills aren't there yet and that's okay.
In the future they may be but if the choreography is something they expect you to nail and you aren't able than I wouldn't audition. Why? Well if the audition is hard what until you see what the group requires next and needs you to nail every time you perform. What has happened is a good thing because you realize where your talent and strengths are and where they aren't.
If you want to write, act, direct etc. than do that because it's what your passion is and you have potential for a ton of success. Join youth theatre and community theatre groups and audition for roles. Also, learn how to ASM, build sets, props and about lighting and directing and build on that. Continue to dance and improve also and go at your pace and level then one day perhaps audition for something like this because you'll be 100% ready. There's tons you will be able to gain from local theatre groups and it seems as that is your passion the best fit.
Also, if you love to write pick up the book The Lively Art of Writing by Lucille Vaugan Payne off of Amazon. If you can master all the tricks or even some of them in this book it will make you a better writer and open up a lot of doors. Consider also volunteering as a writer with a local paper too. That's invaluable experience and take no matter how boring it sounds every last English class you can.
Also, of benefit to you are improv lessons be it at parks and rec or an affordable program as that will make you a better actor and writer in the end.
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I have the worst of luck with guys and I have lots of book resources, I'm not sure why I can't find a decent guy to date. I am currently working on myself and it would be nice to date for once. Anyways, I know of this guy and I'd say he is probably 7 years younger than me. Needless to say there is a huge gap and not to mention maturity. I want to know why he is always around me then completely flakey. I get the notion he cares too much about what people think of him and is a bit weird. He is a nice looking kid and I might think he might be in the closet. Why is it so hard for us to be friends or connect? He's around me non-stop and looks at me ALOT. Btw we are swing dancers, in class he makes me laugh and I overall get the sense he's a smart guy. I have tried to contact him on facebook and he has ignored my messages. But, honestly I'm not sure why he's always around me and staring at me. He talks to other girls and I just think he's a bit strange. I've heard he's called me stuck-up, but honestly he is lol. I'm not sure if he's at the age where he likes women romantically and he dances with his guy friend a lot. Hence I get the fear he might be bi. Why is he acting like this all the time? He's a child, but honestly I think he would make a fun friend. A friend of mine thinks he is fake, I just think he has a lot of growing up to do. I can't change him and some other friends said they used to be friends with him.
What's his deal? I get it, he thinks I'm attractive. What's up with his fascade? (link)
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You are over analyzing this and that's a part of the problem. Next you're being judgmental. You don't know him but have already thought him less mature than you and think he cares too much what others think of him. On top of that you're questioning his sexuality and thinking of him as a bit strange.
How do you want him to see you? Can you see why he might think you're a snob or whatever else? It doesn't feel good. You've also thought of him as a "child" for being socially awkward. There are a lot of socially awkward people and to a degree you are like that too but quite often they are the most honest people, friends and suitable partners. Unless you're over 18 and he's under an age gap usually isn't a big deal.
We all have this idea in our heads of what a perfect partner looks like and what we think we're looking for but we can't let any of that cloud our judgment or we might miss the perfect person in front of you. It could be this is a person you're meant to be with and or have as a friend. Allow yourself to be open to anyone and anything.
As far as your friends go their thoughts and prior interactions and friendships or relationships are their's not yours. You have to go in finding out for your ownself what he is or isn't to you by interacting.
No doubt he has a sense of humor if you can make one another laugh. That's good and so is an interest in dance. You should tell him "My friends tell me you think I'm a snob." Use that to get him to laugh and then introduce yourself and mention you're an introvert not an extrovert but would love the opportunity to get to know him. That will work. Show you're genuinely interested in getting to know him.
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3 friends/ girls Freshmen in highschool
Surely but not even slowly, the girls I not so long ago began to claim as friends have changed. They’ve all gotten into their “ relationships” which was the inevitable but still shocked me a little at discovering it. But hears my real problem we barely talk due to no classes together, even when the new semester starts we’ll have a class together I don’t know if I could see them as the same girls. Does them engaging in relationships mean they’ve changed?,I’m quite biased, and do I still consider it a friendship? What’s the status?. (link)
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Aside from starting to date you need to ask yourself if they really have changed apart from that. If they are fundamentally the same people with same values and interests as before than odds are things are fine.
They may be swamped with school as are you. Also, the whole relationship thing is new so they're totally into that but once the honeymoon is over and novelty of it dies down I'm sure they'll be back to hanging out as before. If you find that you have zilch in common anymore and don't like them than move on.
I'm being honest that I see a hint of jealousy here from you that you really want to be dating and doing exactly as they are and expieriencing the same thing. That's normal but it's also an indication that you can have what they have and can/should explore that if it's what you feel ready for.
There's nothing wrong at all with reaching out to them and telling them you miss hanging out. I would suggest trying to throw a get-together on a weekend and see what happens. Judging from who comes, doesn't or fails to get back to you it will give you a sense of where the real friend is or isn't among them. That's what I would try.
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I’m experiencing some trust issues with 2 girls I call friends. Imagine this , being in the same high school with your sister who is a senior; you a freshmen. Everyday your in the cafeteria she comes to talk to you, when she walks past the 2 girls watch her and hide their laughter as if they’re making fun of her or have an inside joke about her daily appearance or clothes. I don’t know what to do about it or how to treat them if they are laughing at and disrespecting my sister. How should I sneakily find out if they are laughing at her, and what to do if they are? These aren’t the kind of girl friends I could approach and ask or confront about if they were laughing at her, and they definitely aren’t going to take me seriously or they might laugh at me behind MY back. This also feels like a disrespect to me and they all have sisters too and I will never make fun of theirs. (link)
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Ask your sister outright whether or not these two individuals have been bothering her or not. Perhaps they aren't or your sister is smart enough not to let it bother her any. The worst thing you could possibly do is start something about your sister with them if there isn't proof or your sister doesn't want you to.
You could make a situation ten times worse for her and an instant enemy for yourself. Instead, ask your sister about the situation and how she wishes to handle it. You also don't know what exactly they are laughing about or even whispering and should assume nothing.
If something else is going on where you know for sure it is in fact bullying than standing up for her is right. You can tell your parents about what you have seen and teachers even anonymously and get adult help to intervene but for now start first by finding out from her what is going on because you don't have a grip on that yet or much to go on.
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I work in a sex store and there’s an “arcade” in the back where people go to watch porn have sex. The other day I saw a man attempting to lead a woman who was clearly drugged out in there. I told him that they couldn’t enter because she couldn’t consent and they left. I was already beating myself up about not calling the cops then when about an hour later they came back in. Her nose was bleeding but not from drugs, it was bashed in and looked like she had either fallen or been punched. I tried to reason with her, asked her if she had anywhere to go or if I could call someone for her but she couldn’t understand me. I then tried to talk to the man, told him what he was doing was wrong, she can’t consent and if he has sex with her it was rape. He was basically just looking through me so I told them I was going to call the police and they promptly left as I was dialing 911. They were gone by the time someone answered and I was just told to call again if they came back. I have not slept since this happened. I can’t eat anything, I can’t stop crying. I have never felt more guilty in my life. I don’t know how I’m going to live with myself knowing that I let a woman get raped and I didn’t do everything I possibly could to stop it. I keep going over in my head all the things I should have done. I’ve never hated myself so much and I don’t know what to do (link)
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You really shouldn't feel guilty about any of this because you checked off all the right boxes and called police. That's exactly what you should have done and you acted correctly. There's not much more you could have done to assist her. There's no doubt and it's normal to feel traumatized by the event but you have to let yourself know the truth that you did everything you were supposed to and acted swiftly and appropriately.
My next question is how badly do you want/need this particular job? While you'll meet normal people like you and I in a job like that you'll also meet some pretty disturbed people like you just did. It may not be right for you to work in an environment where people are engaging in sexual activity and have to monitor them to make sure they aren't doing anything illegal or assaulting anyone. You may want to consider doing something else and getting a job in a healthier environment.
You can't ans shouldn't hate yourself over anything however as I mentioned this may be a signal to you that working there isn't where you should be.
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In my school I have friends and they are friendly but when we talk we talk like strangers. I feel don’t fit in with them. They all talk about stuff and when it is a joke they all laugh and I don’t understand a thing they say or what kind of things they like. We all have nothing in common, like really nothing.
I am a girl. (link)
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They really aren't friends are they especially if they feel like strangers and you don't fit in with them. If you have nothing in common than it's not really a friendship. If they joke and laugh and you don't feel included that's a signal to stop wasting time with them and find people you do click with and become friends with them. I know that's not easy at times but it's the best and healthiest thing you can do for yourself moving forward.
Try befriending the kids who don't have friends or have trouble trying to fit in with peers or sit alone at lunch unnoticed. These kids make the best friends and don't judge people. Reach out to anyone that is bullied and try joining student council or an activity where you'll meet all kinds of people with different background but same interests.
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I (16 year old male) tend to masturbate in my pyjamas, rather than naked. However, I recently googled about whether other people do it this way, and I came across people that do, but they tend to put their hand down their pants and do it. I just feel the bit with the erection there, and move it until I ejaculate into the pants (I’m very squeamish so don’t really like the idea of touching my bare genitals)
I wipe the semen out of my pyjamas and wash my hands when I’m done, but I’m not 100% sure whether it’s safe to masturbate this way.
I think my mom is slightly concerned about the amount I ask for clean pyjamas though. Do you think she is aware of all this masturbation though? If not, how do I tell her?
(link)
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There's nothing dirty or wrong with your genitals and they are quite clean provided you practice proper hygene and bathe the area in the tub or shower. You have to get over fear of touching them. Nothing bad will happen for doing so. After all the poster below me is right you need to for urination and are no doubt touching your penis then. How is it any different when not? It's the same thing as touching them for urinating. It's Normal and okay and definetly shouldn't freak you out any.
Not everyone masturbates the same way. You have found what works for you and that's fine. What one person likes another may not.
Most parents of teens and children in general pretty much suspect their kids are doing this with frequency as it's normal at any age and pretty much universal during puberty with either sex. They just may not have spoken to you about it.
As far as the PJs issue goes it sounds not only messy but you constantly are having to wash them. You may want to use wet wipes or kleenex to clean up ejaculate rather than constantly soil your clothing. Everything you are doing is safe and normal so you shouldn't worry about it.
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My wife was advised by her sister about 2 months ago to get off Adderall completely because she said it had horrible long term effects. She took a high dosage (as I understand for Adderall) of 20mg x 2 daily. She hadn’t spoken with her sister for over 3 years due to a riff but once reconnected they talk constantly. Her sister is a CNRA and as such regularly dispenses medical guidance which my wife follows with little reservation. Based on her sister’s recommendation to stop Adderall she quit it cold turkey almost 2 months ago and it has been difficult since... she is quick tempered now, VERY short, and almost can’t hold a conversation during the day without some “playful” verbal jab. She goes to bed because she says she is exhausted by between 7:30-8:30 yet says she is always sleepy. It’s taking a toll on us.. she doesn’t want to hear anything about treating her ADHD and if I bring it up she says “why don’t you like me for me!” Any advice is greatly appreciated! (link)
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Each person who has ADHD has a different set of circumstances and requirements for medication and totally different dosages and reasons for taking it. What may not have worked for your wife's sister with Adderal doesn't have a damn thing to do with how your wife's situation and need for it is.
Only a doctor and the one she is seeing for this can determine the course of treatment and take care of your wife's needs. It doesn't matter any if the sister is a CNRA she ought to know better that everyone is different and only the doctor treating a person should be the one listened to not her.
I'm not one for attacking people but I would talk to the sister and point out to her that she is NOT your wife's doctor and that it's inappropriate not to mention harmful the advice she has given which has led to your wife quitting the proper treatment.
Also, if your wife's moods, temperament and mental health have started suffering try to keep her away from this person and insist that she re-visit her doctor with you and talk about what has been happening and that she quit the drug. Nothing your wife is currently experiencing or doing is remotely in the realm of normal behaviour. Let her know you like her a lot and that's why you have to step in here and get her proper help or you wouldn't be doing the right thing. Her sister needs to know that what she's done is dangerous.
The problem in a situation like this is that the sufferer doesn't see themselves as sick or that anything is amiss but you have to try to get her back to obeying the doctor and correct treatment and may need to recruit other members of her immediate family to convince her that she's in trouble.
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i need your help, i recently had incontinence, and i wore depends till i ran out now i wear, wearevers they are great underwear but i great for bowel accidents, they are great for urine though, so i need to ask my parents for depends, or adult diaper brand, please help me, God bless
skyler (link)
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You need to see your doctor immediately and get a referral if needed to a specialist to figure out what is happening and contro it. Your quality of life is suffering and with all medical issues left unchecked it will get drastically worse as time goes on. You owe it to yourself to see someone.
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I'm an Artist, well that's what they say i paint, illustrate, make collages, create and everything .. Well that was before, not doing that anymore , lacking of motivation and working at some boring tourism company,sick of this country and trying everything to go out of it. I don't want to do anything except for sleeping and watch a movie or something, i feel like i don't fit in not like i want that,it just really hard sometimes, i just wanna be home alone.
I'm almost 30 now and a year ago i began dating this guy whose 5 years younger than me, it started really good i saw myself changed a little bit, then again the same feelings and decided to break up, he didn't agree he talked and talked and somehow he convinced me to give it one more try so i accepted it, again it was good even better but after some time i got in the same position, wanting to be alone not wanting seeing him but i continued anyway because he wasn't bad at all, he cares about me like no one did ..
Now it's been a year and 3 month, i couldn't take it any longer so i broke up AGAIN... and he just said ok and after 3 days he sends me this touching message that whatever my condition is i need to get out of it i should try new things ,that he can't lie that he's miserable now but if i'm happy like this then it's better for both of us if we stayed apart..he just trying to look strong, but he's not we have mutual friends my best friend who actually works with him in the same company they all saying how miserable he become and doing alot of mistakes at work, not concentrating ,bla bla
My best friend sits with him like hours talk and talk ,she suggested that he could really help me getting out of from my situation, and now he sends me a msg wanting to see me, ofcourse i will ...
Now i miss him i got jealous from the girls im not saying i dont love him,just my situation makes everything harder ..and makes me think is it because of my situation or i just don't love him .. (link)
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I would bet money on it that you don’t have guy issues but rather have depression which is not going to away but actually become worse untreated. Everything you mentioned from not able to function, loss of interest in everything including that which you love are big red flags.
What you should do tomorrow is arrange to see your family doctor pronto and tell them every single word of what you told us and be brutal about how adversely this is affecting you. Insist on a psychiatrist referral for diagnosis and treatment and go from there. It will make your life ten times better by dealing with it head on and right now.
You are still that bright person and gifted artist underneath all this crap depression throws at you and makes you devalue yourself. Hopefully you’ll see that and will be enjoying life again and even better than before but you have to make that phone call which will change your world.
As far as guys go let’s put that on the back burner and deal with the most important thing your overall life and mental and physical health first. This guy may not be a boyfriend but he cares deeply for you. Whatever you decide you could really use the support. He isn’t being a dick to you either by telling you something is off because you see that there is with life right now. It will all work out but you have work to do but taking first step to handle this is the hardest and best part.
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University is such a competitive environment people will help you but at the same day they’ll always try to one up you. I told my friend that I was planning to do a certificate to add to my major so it’ll be easier to find a job. We’re in the same program now all of a sudden she wants to do the certificate. I told her after I graduate I wanted to do a different program and all of a sudden she’s doing that program as well. I have another friend I told her how I joined a couple of school clubs related to my program now all of a sudden she wants to join the club too cause it’ll look good on her resume. Why can’t people do their own thing? It’s starting to get on my nerves what would you do in my situation (link)
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They trust you and your judgment but they don’t trust themselves or know where they are going. Having heard from you about what you did and that it’s working is a sign to them that maybe they should do this too. It’s also a comfort thing to be in same boat or in this case programs and clubs as someone they know. In all honesty they’re lost without you and is a core reason they are following all your moves that have been successful.
I wouldn’t be irritated by it but if you are don’t share plans openly and or encourage them to see that they need to make choices and make mistakes on their own and that just because something was right for you doesn’t mean it will suit them. Be compassionate and empathize with the fact they’re feeling lost.
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So I want to call out this person so bad cause she’s starting to annoy me anytime I talk to her she’s mouthing what I’m saying while I’m saying it to her, at first she’s never done it but now every time I talk to her her mouth moves while I’m saying something. I don’t really notice her do it to anyone else. I have another friend as well she’ll repeat what I say to her but I understand why she does it because English isn’t her first language and she does it to other people. Should I call her out on it or just leave it alone? Maybe I don’t speak clearly or loud enough? (I’ve been told I talk too quiet but when I talk normal suddenly I’m too loud) any advice? (link)
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Odds are this habit isn’t to mock you or coming from malice or she wouldn’t be a friend or act it. It could be a non conscious thing she’s doing with no thought behind it or idea why. Rather than call her on it and display anger why not say gee I notice when we talk together that you do this. Ask why and get an explanation from her. Decide from that how you feel about relationship from there. It’s probably nothing to worry about and something she has no idea has you annoyed.
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I need help. I've tried to kill myself 3 times in the past week and it's not working. I tried to hang myself the first two times and i can't find anything strong enough to bare my weight. I tried to overdose even though I knew it almost never works. Now I'm getting sick and I feel horrible and definitely not dead. I've told all my friends what I was going to try to do. Said my goodbyes. I can't deal with telling them that I failed in even that. I've cut myself for a really long time. I've never been diagnosed with anything but I also haven't told anything to my parents. I just am confused on what I even do now. (link)
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Thank God you are still here where you are meant to be whether you can see that yet or not. You have a family that loves and needs you. What you are dealing with is a mental health crisis. An illness is telling you that you are worthless etc and trying to get you to harm yourself. As hard as it may seem you need to tell an adult that you trust preferably your parents that you have tried to kill yourself 3 times and need medical help.
They need to take you to the ER and you must be honest with them about the desire to kill yourself, the unsuccessful attempts and that you need help because your life has been spinning out of control and don’t want to harm yourself.
They will treat this as a crisis which it is and have a psychiatrist examine you and diagnose and treat you until you can see reality again and that these feelings are wrong and not true of your real self. If they have you stay in a hospital for 72 hrs or longer it’s no big deal because all it is is time to rest, stay out of harm and to help you repair your life and overcome all of this. There’s no shame in any of this and all they want to do is make you whole. That starts now by telling a trusted adult.
Your friends need this asses kicked for listening to you tell them plans and doing nothing at all to inform adults to get you helped. That’s the opposite of friendship and loyalty. Through the process of getting well you’ll find out who the real friends are and purge the rest.
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