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Why does my boyfriend always want anal sex even though he knows how much I dislike it?
Why does my boyfriend always want anal sex even though he knows how much I dislike it and it turns me off and I'm crying but he still continues and even gets off
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It's your body and if you don't want to do something than don't. If he can't handle that tell him to take a hike. He sounds like a prick (excuse my word choice) who only cares about what he wants. If he cared about you at all he would stop if he saw you crying. Is he worth staying with? Probably not. If he can't understand no or your stance on this than it's time to move on.
Someone like that is someone to be well clear of. There's no genuine concern or love there. It's not right that he knows where you stand and keeps trying to push things. It shows exactly where his mentality is and how he views you. Let him know that he's on thin ice and that if he doesn't get the word NO to move on and find someone else because you're done.
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Because you stay with him, and he is only into pleasing himself, or what is most important to him is how he feels and gets off, he figures you are okay with it, no matter what you say to the opposite. Many males think this way, that if a girl didn't like something, she wouldn't just say something, she would leave him and look for a guy better than him.
Some people are selfish in sex, its all about them. If you want a male just for sex and are not lookingk for a long term relationship, it should be very easy to find a man who wants a sex partner and will like more of the things you like. But you must talk ahead of time, as awkward as it may seem. I wasted 30 years with a man I was mismatched with sexually and never had orgasms with him because as I found out at the end of marriage, he had never been in love with me. I was just a free maid, cook, sexual outlet for him and so on. I was not a love and cherished wife. But I learned and have the perfect man now. Unfortunately I didn't start looking til I was almost 50. I have been with my new husband 10 happy years. We like the same things in sex, he will work on me for however long until I have my orgasm before he allows himself to have one for example. We also trade nights where he says its all aboutfocusing on me, and other nights where I take my turn and make it all about focusing on him. This is how is should be and can be if you find the right man hon. If your guy knows you dislike it, then he is not honoring your wishes. Only a man who truly cares deeply about you will care if something he says or does inadvertantly hurts your feelings, makes you upset enough to cry. I thought I had put all the boundaries out there of what I like and what is not okay. One day my husband did something in public that I did not like. So a short while later when he saw me crying, he was horrified that he might have done something to hurt me without knowing it.So I told him what it was and he promised he would never do it again and he has kept that promise becaouse now he knows I don't like it and that it would upset me. He loves me that much that he would change his behavior. Your guy might love you a little, enough to make it work for him, but no where near enough to make the relationship work for you.
If you were a long married couple, I would suggest couple counseling. However, you are just dating, and even if you feel like there is some commitment, there really isn't without the kind of love needed for a successful loving relationship being missing.
You can not change people so dont even try it. Change comes from within a person, wanting to change to improve themselves, and so as far as he goes, he'd have to want to be a better human being,bf or husband or father. He doesn't want to change or he would have done so if he truly loved you enough to want to change what he does.
YOu can do better hon. But you need to learn first what it is you need and want and be able to recognize those traits in a man before you can take the controls and ask for what you want and if the guys doesn't have those qualities, you simply stop seeing them and dating them and move on. Afte my bad first marriage, I changed tactics, did not wait for a guy to approach me, worked on myself to get to whare I was self confident and not afraid to ask for what I want and I turned down a lot of guys because they were not able to meet the criteria I had to find what I wanted. I have this info all in piece I wrote, about what I did to find Mr. Right. It can be done. If you wish to laern this all yourself, you are welcome to the info. Just go to 'search advice columnists, find my name 'dragonflymagic' and go to my column and make that request straight to me. Only this way am I able to send the info if you want it. Good luck dear.
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