Basketball3846's advice column

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Q: Hi everyone, I'm a 14/f, and i'm unsure of what to do. For the past year or so I've been really passionate about wanting to become an actress when I grow up. I've loved acting and pretending all my life, and last year i decided i wanted to make it my career. I told all my friends and my parents, and now they're all rooting me on to become and actress. Here's the trouble. Lately, I've been losing passion in it. Not that I wouldn't like to act, but i think I've decided that I don't want to spend years and years hoping for a break in Hollywood. I've decided that I want go into modeling for two reasons 1.) i don't think i'm gorgeous, but i think i'm pretty enough where I could do it and become (hopefully) famous. 2.) Modeling sometimes leads into acting jobs. what do you think? Should I keep up my 'dream' of becoming an actress, or should I embrace the new dream of becoming a model?
thankz! ~unsure

Alrighty. Well I think that you should follow your heart. Whatever YOU like better, you do it. Maybe you are losing passion on actressing but who knows, it maybe that you have just done it too much recently. Try taking a break from it and see if your passion for it comes back. If not, then sure go into modeling. It is true that actresses and actors come out of modeling careers. Take Ashton Kutcher for example. He started out modeling and now he is a really hot actor making a ton of money! So follow your heart. Do what you really want to do and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Good Luck!!

Q: I find myself uttering "I hate you Peter Smith" (my ex boyfriend who dated me 5 years and broke up...not his real name). Am I nuts? Do I have a version of Tourette's Syndrome? Because I will say and see these things when I am doing nothing in particular. Its not all the time, but it freaks me out.
I told my current beau not to wig when I say that, and that it happens. In fact, I am usually alone when these things happen. It doesn't bother me functionally, but it is unnerving.

Alrighty. When you are at home or where-ever and you are alone try doing something to take your mind off these things. Try listening to music and singing along. Watch a television show or a movie. Read a good book. If any of these things don't work then maybe you should try avioding being alone. Try hanging out with your friends and family more. Good Luck!!

Q: Okay well I have this friend Casey that is reallie jealous of me bcuz I know alot of guys and I have a bf and all.Casey goes around calling me the worse names in the book like c*nt and sl*t and a whore and all.ANd the funny thing is I only have one bf and she likes spreading rumor to everyone so now my bestfriend is mad at me bcuz Casey said I fucked her bf and now I dont know what to do and evening Stephaine bf told her that we didnt have sex which we didnt and now I dont know how for her not to be mad at me:(So please help what should I do:(
-Kimmy

Alrighty. Well, Casey sounds like the worst friend anyone could ever have. I would get rid of her asap. Friends are suppossed to be there for you and be happy for you not go spreading rumors about you! About all these rumors, just keep telling everyone that they aren't true. Whoever the rumors include you with like Stephanie's bf for instance, talk to him and tell him that you need his help to turn down all these rumors. Without his help people are just going to think you are lieing. Try ignoring them or maybe try telling a teacher or family member that this person is spreading horrible rumors around the school about you. No one should have to deal with this kind of stuff. Good Luck!!

Q: I keep having dreams about my ex-boyfriend.I have never seen my present boyfrend in my dreams.The more I have dreams about my ex the more I wanna get back with him.What should I do?

Alrighty. I had exactly the same problem except I couldn't stop having dreams about this guy I had a crush on. I ended up having a dream about us kissing and I REALLY liked it. I was so mad with myself I decidded I just had to tell my boyfriend. He completly understood and he said that you can't control what you dream. So try to think about your boyfriend or something else that makes you happy before you fall asleep. If this doesn't work, then don't worry about it. You and your Ex broke up for a reason and now you and your boyfriend are going out for a reason. Dreams don't mean anything. Good Luck!!

Q: so my good friend jack is going out w/ my x-girlfriend and they are IN LOVE. well me and his gf Liz are still good friends and we always tell each other that we look good if we do. well yesturday @ my bday party i texted her saying she looked really good....cuz she did. well Jack read that text and now hes really mad @ me. but he knows thats how we are so i dont see why hes mad. someone help! please!

*text guy*

Alrighty. Well it sounds obvious that Jack is jealous that you and Liz still have that good relationship. He may be afraid that he will lose Liz to you. Try talking to him and telling him that you and Liz have always been this way and you don't understand what upset him so much. Whatever it was, try not to do it in front of him or when he is around. Tell him that Liz is really in love with you and he doesn't have to worry about her coming back to you if that's why he got so upset. Good Luck!!

Q: hey! how did you get people to see your advice coloumn?? i just made one but like i never get any new questions lol....mine is texangirl01...how do people get to notice it??

What you do is under your section that says "Welcome Texangirl01!" It will say your advice column. Click on that and then put that link in whatever place you want ot send it too.

Q: Most of my friends don't like one of my friends, and there is a good reason for this. Last night, I slept over my friends house who is one of the ones who doesnt like the other friend...and she was sayin mean stuff 2 the other friend on IM, and then I got on my screen name and the one who no one likes IMs me and asks "where r u?" so i signed off quick ssayin i hadda go, but I think she might've had an idea i was right there and think i was takin part in it. I just don't wanna get in the middle of the whole thing. There are some good reasons the rest of my friends don't like her, but I don't want to stop being friends with her or any of the other ones. If she confronts me again and asks where I was and finds out I was right there, what do I say?

Alrighty. Welll, you could 1) Deny it and tell her a little white lie, but then again. Lieing is not the greatest thing you can do in this situation. But if I were you I would just tell her that some of your friends are a little cautious about her and you just wanted to see why this was and maybe make things better for her. Good Luck!!

Q: I have a big problem , I went out with my bf and he's 17 , Im 15 well a really nice gurl to him , he dumped me and went for here..... How do I get over him , He keeps talking about her everytime Im around him..... HE"S HURTING MY FEELINGS!!!!! PLZ HELP Thanks Jenipher

Alrighty. Well, I was in the same pickle jar as you not 5 days ago. You should take some time to yourself and hang out with your friends. Try to take your mind off him as much as possible. Good Luck!!

Q: Im sorry this is gross but I really dont get how to put a tampon in...i keep trying but i cant do it....what is wrong with me?
*pulls paper bag over head*

Alrighty. Well don't worry. The first time is really weird. Inside the package there should be a piece of paper and on it is the instructions on how to insert it. If not, ask your mom how because she may know how. Good Luck!!

Q: Okay my boyfriend and I have been dating for 8 months now. One of his really good friends is a girl and she and I don't get along. I dislike her because she has talked trash about him behind his back early on in our relationship telling me that I shouldn't like him, that he's a horrible person and he's a bad kisser and all this mean stuff. She used the fact that she dated hima s an excuse as well. She and I never were really good friends but she and he always have be like good friends. I now realize how hard it is for him. Because we dont like each other. He's told me how she'd make a comment when he would say he was with me or something about me and sometimes I'll admit I would roll my eyes and maybe make a comment when he talked about her. I've realized this is hard for him. I'm not sure if I want to be her friend but I do want to make things easier for him and easier for our relationship because at one point this situationw as a big factor and reason for our fights. And after our last big fight it came up again after it wasnt for like 2 months. I don't know if I should set aside my differences with her or if I should just ignore it? help please!

Alrighty. What I would do is try talking to your boyfriend and tell him why you don't like his friend. Try to tell him the things she has said about him in the past. Try not to be so harsh on it though because it may be hard for him to hear all the things she is saying about him behind his back. Then he might understand why you act the way you do. And when you are around him and he brings her up, try to hear what he is trying to say. Don't show any "bad" signs that you don't like what he is talking about. With his friend you might want to talk to her about the way she acts too. It sounds to me as if she is still in love with him and she just wants you to break up with him so that she can have him back all to herself. Good Luck!!

Q: well i posted a message stating my problem with these three guys. well i talk to one of them and told them that it wasnt going to work that was this boy named bryan. Now i am faced with the big decision of picking Joseph or Donald but i dont know wich one. See i have known Donald a lot oonger than Joseph but we have all ways been friends but we never had those conversations dealing with getting to know each other like fave color and food things like that. Well he has a friend named Joseph and i like joseph and donald keeps telling me the Joseph really wants to get with me. Me and Joseph have talked a feew kissed a few. But see i really like joseph i like a lot of things about him. But see he is a big flirt and so am i so evan though one of us would be in a relationsship we would still end up fliorting with some one els. But im not really worried about that i want to know how can i pick between them which one to choose and if i should tell the one that i didnt pick that i go with his friend pleaz help signed~ worried to pick

Alrighty. Well it sounds like you are in quite a pickle. What I would do is just stay single until you get to know Joseph a little more. Once that happens, I personally think you should choose him becuase it sounds like you two really enjoy each others company. I hope things work out! Good Luck!!

Q: Leah, I just can't help myself, when ever I see a pillow, I just get the urge to makout with it. Leah, please tell me whats wrong!!!

Alrighty. Well ,Emily. It sounds like you need to get yourself a boyfriend because I don't think pillows are going to help you much in practice. But I think that 13 isn't really the age when you should be practicing this stuff anyways. On boys or pillows. So try to slow things down and take it easy. Wait until the time is right for you. Good luck!!

Q: I love to swear. My friends unfortanatly hate it. this one girl on my bus hits me really hard on the head whenever i swear. even like shut up.

Alrighty. Well, what you should do is go up to this girl and tell her how this makes you feel. But it sounds like this girl is only trying to stop your little swearing problem. I bet that she just wants to help you stop. Swearing can be addicting so you might want to get some help with it. But I would just talk to this girl about hitting you on the head. Ask her why she does this and ask her to stop. Good Luck!!

Q: Let me explain the whole situation, I'm gay, and I have a girlfreind, and we have been dating almost 4 months now. My parents know I am gay, they have known since the first few weeks of me dating my girlfriend. At first, they were okay (stress the OKAY) but they werent really accepting. The still arent. In usual coming-out situations between child and parent, the parent says "We still love you no matter what" type of thing. I told my mom, all she said was 'I'de rather you be straight" and she told my dad, who has said absolutly nothing to me within these 4 months. My mom acts okay about it occasionaly, but for the most part, she doesn't like it, and thinks me and my girlfreind spend too much time together. My dad just hates it, he has made that blatenly obvious, not through so much words, but just the way he looks at me and my girlfreind together, and how if I want to use the car to go see my best friend (whom he loves) he tells me I can have the car as long as I want, but when I want to see my girlfreind, he doesn't want me to use the car at all. My girlfriend says she doesn't feel welcome at my house, and I can definitly see why. I have tried having her over alot so they would get used to her, and maybe get to know her, and treat her like she was my best friend, but all they do is look coldly at her, and at me, and just ignore us the whole time we are there. I want to write them a letter, because I think, that if its writen down in words, it has more of an impact, because its there, written, right in front of you, but I have no idea where to start. Can anybody help me, please..?

Oh it says use age and gender for relationship questions. I'm 16 and I am a female.

Alrighty. Well, if I was you, I would just forget what your parents think. Who cares? Both you and they can't control whether you are straight of gay. It doesn't matter at all, right? It is your life! Talk to your girlfriend and tell her that you are really working on trying to get your familys approval. If they still don't like you for who you are just forget about them. I think you are very smart for writing the letter because that way they can keep it and look at it everytime they are thinking their opinions of your life. In it try to tell them how your girlfriend feels about they way they treat you two. And if that doesn't work try having them sit down with you two and talk things over. Good Luck!!

Q: Hey alicia..i need help..Theres this guy i like and we were friends for 2 years..but ever since school started we kind of stoped talking...becuz i live on lehighton n he lives in palmerton..so i only get to see him in the summer...witch really buggs me...and i don't kno how to tell him i like him...cuz weneva i talk to him i get all scared and stuff...n i want to ask him out but i'm afraid becuz i don't want him to say no becuz i really like him..i never liked n e one this much! how do i tell him?! please help me! thanx

Alrighty. Well, whatever you do, do not ask him out. I have asked out many a boys in my life time and they have all said no. The reason maybe because they don't like me but one of my boyfriends told me not to do that again because it just scares the guy away. When you are around him you should talk to him. Nervousness is normal. When you start to talk to him think about a bunch of good times you have had with him and that should take your mind off being so nervous and scared. To tell him you like him, just go up to him very positive-like and say "You know, I have been thinking. I think that we are pretty good friends and maybe in a little while we should take things up a notch and go further than just friends." See what his reaction is and give him sometime to think this over. Remember, don't rush guys. They are a little slow ;-) Good Luck!!

Q: hey its me again i love this 1 girl i mean i cant get my mind offa her ive been tryin 2 forget about her for 6 months because all signs say she doesnt like me any more but im hopin she still does ya know???? i mean you got any ideas on how i could try and get her back or possibly forget about her ill try anything SOME! HELP!!!

Signed,
Crushed Heart (aka Jax)

Alrighty. Well, I was in this same position. It is SO hard to just stop thinking about her as you probably know by now. You should become good friends with her and don't give up hope. You never know, she might be thinking this same thing about you. So, like I said, become one of her really good friends and hang out with her a lot. Smile when shes around you and try to blow off little hints that you are still attracted to her. Good luck!!

Q: ok me and this guy..we will call him peter were like best friends until it started being more. well he stopped talking to me and when i asked him about it he said it was because he fell for me and didnt wanna ruin our bro/sis relationship.. so i told him how did he kno that i didnt feel the same way and such. so i guess you could say we were "talking" after that but that just led to him not talking to me aGaIn! its like he just picks these random moments where he stops talking to me and im tired of it! well this is one of those times right now except i know he doesnt feel the same way about me anymore but i cant help it i still like him alot! its like everytime i try to meet someone new i know i will just compare them to him. what should i do! i still want us to be friends but i know once we are i will just want to be more again..

Alrighty, well the same thing happened to me just recently. I think the reason is that he just doesn't know how you feel about him so he wants to aviod you until he finds out. What you should do is go up to him and tell him how you feel. Tell him that you still really want to be friends and you want to understand why he doesn't talk to you at times. I bet he will understand your feelings and who knows, once you start talking again he may fall for you once more! Good Luck!!

bio

Hey guys! My name is Leah and I am 15 years old. I'm from Maine where it's always beautiful but for some reason, everyone here wants to leave it. I love playing basketball and just hangin out with my friends whenever I can. I am the advice giver in my group of friends and I always help them out with whatever it is they may need. When I get older I want to be a phyciatrist and have a huskey named Isabella. I don't know why but I do. If you have a problem, I am here for you and wont judge you at all. I never pass up on a question passed to me so don't be shy. I've been through a lot in the past 15 years and I'm sure I will be able to answer a majority of you guys' questions. Hit me up and don't forget to live for the moment. It's the most important thing you can do.