I aim to give you solid advice on your problems. I don't sugarcoat things and I'm always straight up. Don't come asking for what you want to hear as I always give the truth even if you don't want it because it's what you need and the only way to grow.
Gender: Male
Member Since: December 31, 2006
Answers: 3591
Last Update: August 30, 2022
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I'm really not sure if anyone will be able to help me out on this one, but I'm really depressed about this & I'm wondering if anyone can help me out at all.
First of all, I live in Kentucky. I've been on disability since I was 14 or 15 due to a kidney disease. I've tried to hold a job before, but I just can't do it. My immune system is too weak, & I get sick constantly if I'm around a lot of people. Plus, my medicine makes me extremely tired all the time.
So, I'll be 19 in a few weeks. I had to go to the Social Security Office a few weeks ago to refile my claim since I'm legally an adult now. I gave them all the information on my disease & why I can't work & the woman said they send it to the central office for a decision & she didn't see why they'd deny it.
Well, today I got a letter in the mail. They denied my claim. I'm devastated. That was my only source of income. I have bills to pay & I help my family out with groceries & things, so I have no idea what to do now. The reason they listed for denying it was because I hadn't worked long enough. Apparently you have to earn points up to get disability by working, & in order to get it, I was supposed to work for a year and a half BEFORE I first filed for disability. So, there's the problem. I was too young to even legally hold a job before I applied, not to mention I can't even work without getting sick. I thought the whole point of disability was to provide income to people who can't hold a job.
Does anyone know anything I can do? I'm planning on appealing it, but I don't even know if I can talk to them without becoming an emotional wreck. This is so devastating to me. And can someone explain how that is supposed to work when I can't even hold a job? Thanks. (link)
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Tell your doctor immediately. They have no right to remove you from disability income if you have had it all your life. How can someone expect a kid to be working? Also, I was under the impression being on it myself that you aren't to be working period if you are receiving it.
Have your doctor go up to bat for you and talk to them about your condition and why you need those funds. Doctors can often get things changed for patients in a snap when it comes to disability.
Also hire yourself a decent lawyer or use legal aid to do so. There's people who specialize in suing over the stress this causes and to get what is rightfully yours to receive. The lawyer will know how to get your claim settled pronto. And no, you don't necessarily have to speak in court either.
Don't appeal it on your own get your doctor and lawyer to work for you. You can royally screw things up further on an appeal if you don't know how to challenge it correctly like they do. It will get sorted out.
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teachers always think theyre smarter in every way than all the students. the past 3 days 3 different teachers have said something smart ass about me and my boyfriend.
I was cracking his back (and a teacher came up to us and told us to stop smooching, we did nothing , and she physically made us seperate and go to class early)
I was putting my backpack away (once i was done i hugged him and a teacher told me that school was a public place)
These are just some examples. every time a teacher says something like this to me i just want to punch them in the face.
what should i do?
what should i say back?
And its not like were having sex in the hallway, we hug, and occasionally peck on the lips. this is very common for couples at my school (link)
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Unless your school has some kind of policy about students touching other students (it does exist) that this could fall under than she's out of line. If it's just one teacher doing this chalk it up as it being their eccentricity.
You need to reel in your anger. This is NOTHING. Why get upset at it? Why would you want to punch an adult much less a teacher over this? You might not like them but they think they're doing what they're supposed to.
If you say anything say this "I'm sorry if this bothers you." and be respectful, stop the behavior they find offensive and move on. Maybe it was meant as a joke like "stop smooching or you'll be late."
Apologize even if not in the wrong and move on about your business at school. That will end any problem. Don't be so combative either.
Next, find out for yourself if there's some kind of hidden student rule about touching, kissing etc. that you don't know about and nobody else observes. It may be common among your friends but frowned on by the school board.
If a particular r teacher keeps bothering you and making comments about you, your boyfriend and relationship have your parents talk to them and get the principal to deal with it if it's a constant headache from one person.
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I'm "big" for my age...>< I hate being over-weight! But it's in my DNA...On my rough days, I get really depressed that that's why I haven't had my first boyfriend/date/kiss... Lately, it's been more concerning I'm 15/f! I'm glad I have my breast, people mistake/mistoke me for a boy before they came along! I'm still worried that no guy likes me...being home-schooled probally doesn't help but I do weekly activeties!T_T
Point being, does being fat pervent me from having a normal teenaged life(boys,crushes[I've only had 2 my whole life],friends)? I know I'm not a good flirt & I'm a tiny-bit shy ,but does this fat prevent boys&crushes?!
>< lily (link)
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The problem is that broken record playing in your head. It's telling you that nobody likes me, I'm overweight not pretty and other garbage. You've bought into those lies that it's been feeding you and have lack of self-esteem.
The problem is that EVERYONE you meet although they don't know your actual problem can see how you carry yourself and your lack of confidence. Boys pick up on this and don't know how to approach you.
You need to show that you are approachable, fun and a good catch. Just let go of this garbage and be who you feel you are inside and don't correct yourself. Talk to people you do activities with and come to know them that way.
If you see someone you like invite them to hang out in a group or host a party. Can I ask why are you home schooled? Does it have to do with illness, wanting to get ahead or school being far away in a rural area?
I was home schooled briefly. There are associations out there meant to link other home schoolers in your area. I sense you're miserable at home when it comes to schooling and not socializing with kids your age. If I were you I would tell your parents that it's not working for you and it's upsetting to lack friends.
Size has NOTHING to do with finding a boyfriend or friends. People will respond to who you are and the qualities you possess and confidence and nothing else.
Believe in yourself, getting talking to them and see where it leads. Don't be a mouse either, but don't be boisterous. Forget about being shy and just get in there and mix with people. You're no different than anyone else but believe you are.
They respond to that and don't know what to make of your fear and lack of confidence. They can see how you carry yourself and that you are withdrawn. It's a real turnoff. Be engaging and who you are and let the chips fall where they may.
Size has nothing to do with love, crushes etc. and shouldn't prevent you from enjoying that or any part of life unless your size is a major health issue--then it can. But it sounds as though you're normal and it's hereditary.
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My boyfriend never wants to eat me out, he used to, but now he's just like "everyone at school makes fun of people that do it", and he says it's kind of gross. But I love it. What should I do? (link)
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Tell him it's a two way street. If he ain't giving than he shouldn't be getting. Secondly, ask him what he thinks is so gross about it anyway? Let him know you find reciprocating to be a bit gross as well but you do it for him.
If he's not mature enough to handle these kind of sexual or other situations look for someone else who is mature enough.
The only problem here is if you were too sweaty, had an infection etc. affecting things then he has a right to feel like he does.
I don't know where you both go to school but the "everyone will make fun of me or it" excuse doesn't wash. What to do? Be blunt and talk to him and if things don't improve consider why you're still with him if he can't handle it maturely. Even if they did why is he sharing private details with others?
Another thing that might work if it's taste or mess he doesn't like is to get a dental dam or plastic wrap to place over your genitals. That's pretty common. He really doesn't have a leg to stand on. I mean say to him how do you think it tastes when it's your bodily fluids? Equally gros right?
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I have my first job interview at Family Christian Book Store
I am not a big christian but i need a job so i am basically taking anything
I am 16 and barley have any job experience
How can i make sure i make myself noticed by the interviewer
if you have worked at Family Christian before are there any tips you can give me
Also should I make myself a resume just so i can stick out?
What should I wear..
HElP with any tips you can give me
what are somethings I can say..Please
ANY TIPS WILL HELP! (link)
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Ask yourself is this really the right place for me? You may need a job but you have to understand that these people usually are hardcore christians or to put it another way fundamentalists.
I have nothing against them but I've found most Christian bookstores I've been in have clerks that force themselves and their beliefs on anyone coming in who asks for a book. I went into one once where I asked for a certain book and was told that the writer is the anti-christ as was I for wanting to read it or believe it.
If you aren't religious they might be more apt to try and get you to believe what they do or maybe they won't hire you. They're going to ask about your core beliefs, why you want a job there etc. etc.
As far as clothing goes dress conservatively in a blouse, skirt or business casual. A resume would help that lists prior jobs and references if you have it. You could hand it to them and indicate this would be your first real job.
Don't volunteer anything about yourself or accomplishment unless asked and always have a list of questions you need to know to be sure it's right for you.
I have to be 100% honest here. They are probably looking for someone a lot older that knows their books, values and christianity, the bible etc inside and out in order to be a clerk there.
You may need a job but just any job in this case may not be the right job. Definitely ask questions, don't volunteer info, take a resume and dress conservative. Also keep your answers short and sweet and not long.
People who are overly talkative or that drone on about themselves and their plans seldom get hired. Also, if anyone asks you "If you could have dinner with anyone alive or dead?" be careful. It's the only legal way they can figure out if you're religious or not if you said Jesus etc. etc.
Also the correct answer to the 5-year plan is "Five years is a long time. Nobody can see into the future that far as anything can happen. That said I would like to do X and help your company doing X."
This is to see if the person is using the job to leap to another one a year or so into employment.
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13/f
soon to be 14.
for my age, my boobs are HUGE. well, compared to my body. B36 and theyre still growing. but, this one with really bothers me about my breasts. theyre pointy. not like madonna's cone bra. noo. not like that.
but like. idno.
and im very pale and m veins in them are very visible.
please do not lecture me saying "everyones body is different"
i know that. but how can i change this? (link)
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According to WikiAnswers the viens especially if they look like a cobweb happen for a few reasons. It could be hereditary, it could also be caused by something hormonal. It's rarely something serious but if it bothers you talk to a doctor or your mom about it.
As for size B36 it's actually quite normal and average. It means you have matured quicker physically than your peers. As far as the shape goes they come in different sizes and shapes. Not everyone's are completely round and perfect.
I think you are referring to a pear shaped breast which is quite common. I wouldn't worry about it. If you're concerned they are still growing consult a doctor or another female. It's only a problem if it's causing you severe back pain.
http://www.healthandage.com/public/health-center/36/article-home/3304/Large-Breasts-and-Back-Pain.html
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I feel like I'm a terrible dancer. I'm like 4'11, about 95 pounds, female, and 16. Curvy, if that helps anything, too. Anyway, it seems like any time I try to move my hips or anything like that, it just looks wrong. My sisters mess with me because I can't shake my butt or anything like them. As stupid as it seems, I'm just staring to get into ballroom dancing, and I feel so stiff, even though it't not doing intense movements that require a lot of hip action.
How do I get my movements to seem more lucid, and actually look good? It seriously feels like I physically can't move like some girls can. (link)
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If you convince yourself and reaffirm over and over that you can't succeed at something you never will. You have to tell yourself that you CAN do this. In your mind picture what the perfect moves are and start trying to mimic them.
Over time you'll be able to do it as you are creating new pathways in your brain. This is how I learn new kickboxing moves that are difficult. You're too stiff and not enjoying anything at all because of this.
Chuck out the I can't and tell yourself you can. Just have fun as the dance moves will all fall into place on their own. Talk to your ballroom dance instructor and tell him/her that you have trouble with your hips and executing certain steps. Maybe he/she can break them down one step at a time until you are comfortable.
It's all about fun and if you have trouble doing something like your sisters can just relax. You can't be perfect. And be sure to get them to teach you if they think you're so hopeless. You may surprise them and yourself. I'd start asking them as you can get the moves down in a supportive (hopefully) environment.
Unless you have hip injury or trouble with your pelvis there's no reason physically that you can't succeed. I think it's all psychological.
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(17/f) Okay so since I was 12 I have been diagnosed with depression. Throughout the years I have been put on medications but I always get the strangest side affects, so I really don't like taking them. I used to be suicidal like 2 years ago but not anymore. Though I still do suffer from depression on a daily basis. I'm getting sick of always feeling like this though and I really don't want to resort to taking medication again. Any tips on what I can do so I don't have to feel like this day to day? Anything is greatly appreciated :) (link)
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Stick with the medication until a doctor decides what should be done with dosages or changes. I know you don't want to but it's the wisest choice. Why? put simply if you go off of it you could spiral down even worse or back to suicidal. You aren't suicidal now so the medication is helping on that level.
If you're feeling miserable all the time with no relief than you've got to speak up to your psychiatrist and be truthful that nothing is cutting it.
They will change things around for you. Let him know how badly the side-effects are affecting you. Once he/she does blood levels, they'll fix the dosages and maybe even come up with something far better.
People with mental health issues (and I'm not leaving myself out) should NEVER no matter how they feel mentally or physically go off any medication without a doctor to bring them down and off of it. You can screw up your stability instantly and not get back to where you were or even better easily.
I'm not sure how bad your depression is but you may need medication for life and you may not. Ask your doctor about alternatives if there are any. He'll fix the dosages as I said earlier which will result in something better. He can't do it without your input or honesty on how you truly feel inside every day.
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Im a singe parent with daughters ages 14,11 and 9, my 14yr old was recently diagnosed with psychosis nos i work full time, im having thoughts of quitting my job so that i coud be at home with my kids, but im very fearful because how will i be able to support my famiy,i have alot of debt, and their father is a dead beat my kids only have me as their provider, my job can be very stressful, and when i come home i also have to dedicate as much time as possibe with my chidren i need advice (link)
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Have you tried to ask for a leave of absence for medical crisis? Tell your boss that your daughter is in crisis (which she is) and was just in hospital for a severe mental health problem.
Let them know you're her only caregiver and need to be with her 24/7 temporarily and deal with three other kids at the same time without any support from their father nor family. Explain your the only one with a pay check coming in and have no alternatives.
They should understand. Also if you talk to her doctor they may know of ways you can get that extra financial and at home support.
If you can't afford daycare see if your parents can be home for the kids when you can't or entrust them to a friend for a few hours while you work and then come home.
Her doctor will definitely have support outlets you can turn to so you can keep working and make sure the kids all have what they need. Tell them the situation you are in.
When it comes to debt the worst thing you can do is get out of the credit game. Don't use your cards obviously but do not cancel a credit line yourself or declare bankruptcy. You'll be screwed for the next seven years.
You just never know when you'll get a chance to pay off the debt either during that time. You might get a promotion or a better job at some point where you can pay it off and get credit cards again if you're responsible.
Let the creditors call you and write letters. That's all they can do. They can't get blood from a stone and cannot set foot on your property or take anything away that they don't know about. Instruct your kids not to pick up the phone unless they know who it is period.
I would also give the 14 and 11-year-olds the responsibility of making sure all homework is done for everyone including themselves by a certain time, a whole ton of chores and a spotless house and rooms for starters. Then you can be at home more rested.
I think you either need that leave of absence or to somehow get help to handle the burden by turning to your friends or family and tell them you can't keep your head above water much longer.
Bottom line the kid with the mental health crisis comes first. Finances, where to live etc. etc. come second and will work out. Nobody you know will let your family down or suffer. But do talk to the doctor a.s.a.p and let him know what life is like for everyone.
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I'm a 13 year old female and i've been getting the urge to masturbate.
-am i too young to masturbate?
-does it hurt?
-how do i do it?
please help me! i dont know anything bout it but i've just heard of it. (link)
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You're going to get oodles and oodles of responses on this one. Everyone will have a different viewpoint. Some of the respondents may have been raised to see it as wrong or sinful and others not.
What I'm going to tell you is different. Doctors all believe masturbation to be NORMAL. Furthermore, they've backed it up with studies and statistics. 70% of females do it and 90% of males of ALL AGES. That means infants, toddlers, teens, adults, senior citizens--well you get the idea.
It's normal if you do it and normal if you don't according to them. It's considered universal among teens of both sexes. Your classmates probably all do it but feel ashamed to admit it. Girls are also more discreet about it and don't talk to peers like boys do.
Age has nothing to do with it. It's your choice to do it and your choice not. As far as instructions go we can't and won't do that or provide links as we must protect minors.
Having said this tips won't help you as every girl and every guy responds differently to certain stimuli. The best thing to do is try different things out and see what works for you.
Also, you said you've heard the word masturbation before but don't know what it means or is. The Webster's Dictionary defines it as stimulate one's own genitals for sexual pleasure.
• [ trans. ] stimulate the genitals of (someone) to give them sexual pleasure.
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I looked it up and it says that it was only 18 episodes? Is that true? (link)
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It lasted one season on NBC. 18 episodes were produced or rather shown before it was pulled due to low ratings.
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Okay i have kinda bad teeth and i was wondering how much it would cost to get my teeth capped and what that would involve doing.Bear in mind I live in Ireland (link)
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That's impossible for us to answer. We haven't seen your teeth to know how rotten they are. Even if we had we're not dentists, don't know the work they'd need to do nor the cost.
You need to make an appointment with a dentist and have them look inside your mouth and make an assessment. They'll then tell you how much things cost and what they would need to do to fix it. At that time you could ask them about caps.
The price will vary by dentist. Also it may also differ from the U.S. and other countries and government or insurance providers. Some of it may be covered and some of it may not. All of these factors drive the cost of the work you're looking to have done.
Call a dentist, see one and ask what things would cost and get your options.
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Okay, well the last episode that aired was when Hollie J and Sav's sister were getting revenge on one another. When is the next episode airing? Is it after the Degrassi Goes To Hollywood? If so, when is that airing? Thanks in advance. (link)
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This all depends on what network you are watching and what country you are in. Secondly, it also matters on what season is being shown. In Canada they are on their 8th season.
I'm aware that the N Channel in the U.S. was and or still is a year behind and doesn't get some of the more controversial episodes.
You may be in luck though as the official site www.degrassi.ctv.ca has full episodes of the show you can view. I'm not sure if the episode you want is archived there. It's best to take a peak.
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We have all been to the movies or to a ballgame or just an event. Most of the time, to get to our seat we have to walk past people that are already sitting. Is it more polite to walk so we face away or face towards them as we do so. One way our butt is in their face but the other our crotch is. I was just curious what people think. (link)
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You need to say excuse me and then slide on down not facing them making sure you don't step on their feet. At every concert or theatrical production I've attended people face away from them so they can grip the seats in front for support.
I've not once in 20 years of concert going ever seen people slide by facing towards you. There's something weird about doing it any other way. It's perfectly acceptable and typically the norm to do it that way. Nobody faces each other. I've never seen it done. Sure enough a week after I answer this someone will do it in front of me.
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I realize that there are different versions of the Stephen King book "The Shining" so I will type the page that I have, then type the one that comes after it. I am missing a page and I checked the local library and they do not have a copy of it. :/
Chapter 28-- "It Was Her!"
the bottom of this page says: He got up, walked slowly down to the first-floor landing and stood there for a moment. He took his handkercheif from his back pocket, wiped his lips with it, and considered going down and pounding on the bedroom door, demanding to be let in so he could see his son. She had no right to be so goddam high-handed.
Well, sooner or later she'd have to come out unless she...
-----missing page-----
"Hi Lloyd," he said. "A little slow tonight, isn't it?"
Lloyd said it was. Lloyd asked him what it would be.
"Now I'm really glad that you asked me that," Jack said, "really glad. Because I happen to have two twenties and two tens in my wallet and I was afraid they;d be sitting there until sometime next April. There isn't a Seven-Eleven around here, would you believe it? And I thought they had Seven-Elevens on the fucking moon.
If someone could please type the page I'm missing, it would be much appreciated! Thanks. (link)
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To really ensure you didn't miss just that page go to a library or bookstore. Ask them for an unabridged copy of "The Shining" I have a feeling you're missing more pages than that.
Unless you know the text backwards and forwards I would look into that and if you missed much else. The pages are always going to be differently numbered for each edition printed. Someone's page 358 may be another number etc.
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15.f
i dated this guy for 4 months and then i left him for another guy.. and then once me and that other guy broke up i came back to him and he took me back. only thing is that he doesnt want people to know we're dating so he tells everyone we're just friends, we're constantly fighting and i just keep thinking about this and if its even worth it . there's this guy in my art class and he's probably the nicest and funniest guy i've ever met. he always compliments me and he is very good at showing affection. but he's telling everyone at school that we're dating and he's even kissed me in front of everybody during lunch. i dont want people to think the wrong thing though, especially since i already did it to him once. but what should i do? i'm so confused. i care about them both but i just dont want to hurt them. (link)
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You mentioned that you didn't want to hurt either of them. That's fair enough. But when you think about it isn't one of them already hurting you? I would be more than insulted and outright pissed if someone who is dating me won't even acknowledge that they were.
Maybe he's cheating and maybe he isn't but that's very bizarre behavior for someone who is supposed to be your boyfriend. If you are constantly stressed and fighting with this creep which let's face it he is go ahead and kiss him goodbye. You don't need that aggravation.
The lesson you need to learn here is to be assertive, stand up for yourself and don't let people walk all over you. Don't be a mouse. This guy is walking all over you and you need to put him in his place.
Once you've done that date the other guy. He seems like a real sweetheart. Just tell him that it was wrong to say he was dating you when it wasn't official. Then start afresh with him and forget the other guy and experience. But yes, you have to learn not to put up with childish crap like this other guy is doing.
If someone really loves you and is dating you they don't go about covering it up in front of others. What is it about you that's causing him to do this? As far as I can see from what you told me the answer is zilch.
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I currently walked out of my work place. My manager has made me feel belittled, disrespected, stupid, useless and a whole bunch of other things that aren't right. There isn't enough room for me to list everything, but I hope the point is still the same.
The icing on the cake came when I was clocked out and on lunch break outside of the business establishment talking with a friend about how I disliked my job. This was a private conversation. Come to find out, my manager was eaves dropping on us. I came back from break and she confronted me with "I heard what you said and I don't appreciate it." After that, she gives a huge list of tasks to do that can't be done within one day, let alone one weekend. I was wrote up later for "gossiping". Was I right for walking out on this job? (link)
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Yes! You also have right to refuse any tasks you think are wrong or unsafe. If this was a private conservation held outside than she/he is in the wrong for listening. They can't fire you for it, demote you or make you do tasks that demean you.
If this place doesn't seem right for you to be in than quitting was the right move. Nobody has the right to treat you like gum under their shoes.
Also, this person probably hasn't gone that far in life with education. The best they'll likely ever amount to is a managerial position like this. Because of their own lack of confidence and education they will treat others the way they feel inside so as not to seem below them.
Any idiot who takes frustrations out on a child under their employ is one to get away from. This person is one sad and sorry person and totally in the wrong. It was wise to move on. Don't look back. There's bigger and better opportunities out there.
Let this be a lesson to you to watch where you converse on or near the business place. They have cameras and possibly other hidden equipment monitoring you and picking up things.
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I just bought Mastodon's new album, Crack The Skye, a few days ago. I paid for the regular three day shipping through Amazon, and the album comes out March 24th. When am I getting the album? The 27th?
Thanks. (link)
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They can't ship the CD until today. Even though they have them on hand the CD would embargoed until the release date. That means they can't ship it until then because the label wants them to respect the release date.
They can't have you or anyone else getting it before it's out and potentially putting it online. The only people with advance copies are journalists and people at their label. So to answer your question the CD would have shipped today and you'll get it on the 26th baring anything unforeseen with U.S. customs.
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14/f
Okay, when I masturbate, I think of guys at first, but suddenly, I start thinking of other females and I really don't like it after I'm finished. I'm very confused. Could I possibly be bisexual or what? I talked to a doctor and he just says I'm 'experimenting'. Could that also be it? That I'm straight, but just going through 'the stage'? (link)
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The doctor is right it's sexual curiosity. It's very common for both males and females to think about this or while masturbating. It doesn't make you gay or bisexual. As l long as you identify yourself as being attracted only to males and not the same-sex you're straight. All it amounts to is something you had curiosity about, fantasy etc.
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How does popcorn get made in the bag when u put it in the microwave?Isnt it a big block of butter before you put it in the microwave?Wouldnt the butter melt and not make popcorn? (link)
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You might want to read this before buying microwave popcorn again or for that matter movie theatre popcorn. The government knows workers processing the popcorn are getting serious lung problems from the fumes emitted from the bag.
It has something to do with the chemicals used to make the imitation butter blocks and other things they coat the corn in. Now, if it's causing them problems do you really want it for yourself? There's usually trans fat in there too.
If you aren't sure what's in it besides the corn and how it works try turning to a place that sells kernels of corn in bulk. Get a popping machine and add your own butter. It will be far healthier.
Basically what happens with the microwave bag is that the kernels pop and get coated in that block of chemicals that make the artificial butter and flavors as the heat continues to increase. The block melts in synch with the popping of the corn as both require the same exact heat and time to cook and to coat.
SEE LINK BELOW:
http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/2004-03-11-popcorn-study_x.htm
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