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Welcome to my column.
I don't apologize for my answers. I speak to the audience, and in doing so I sometimes tell the audience things they don't want to hear or cant handle.
I believe in stands on principle. I believe that doing right for the sake of doing right is a good way to live. I believe in self awareness and encourage it in others. I offer the most unbiased viewpoint I have. And yes, I am only human.
Im going to tell you what I think you need to hear. You are not supposed to take what I say and follow it. You are supposed to take what I say and _think_about_it_
Oh, and feel free to ask me questions, but netspeak, ebonics, terrible grammar, and your teen angst about a crush will be ignored.
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Ohhkay. Where to start. I'm confused. It really would be great to get some older opinions on this question. My topic is: teenage love. What does everyone think of it? Because all my friends, or a fair few, will have a boyfriend who they keep for a week or a month or two and they'll be from day one, "head over heels in love". Now, I for one think that's ridiculous! They're 15/16 year olds and, in particular examples, they'll have a week or two, maybe a month of I love You after they met about 2 days previously - or online or something, and then it stops. I for one think that love can't be anything more than infatuation, but I think this has become the image of teenage love. Now I started going out with my boyfriend 11 months ago and I knew I didn't love him at the start. It was like a 15 year old crush on both parts. I didn't admit to myself I loved him until about 5 months had passed. And even then I didn't say it verbally. Now, at 11 months I feel like I can talk about it freely with him and we've never been closer; I really can't see the end right now, even though everything inevitably ends. But my parents seem to think that it won't last and I'm being ridiculous, wanting to see him so much. They say it won't last, although compared to my friends, me and my boyfriend are practically an old aged married couple - they say its ridiculous that tennagers can possibly even contemplate the meaning of the word 'love'. They also say that what I have is hardly a commitment or any kind of dedication even though I feel completely commited , which I will admit came with time (about a month or two, even more so now). I just want to know - is this true? Have any of you ever experienced or seen 'teen love' do anything but crash and burn compared to the relationships people have when slightly older? Do you think that for some people, like me, it could last? Or is it, in your opinion also, likely to end and be forgotten about? Do you think there is more of a sense of commitment when you're more mature or an equal amount?
Thankyou! Your feedback is
VERY MUCH appreciated
Faye. (link)
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Everyone has to learn to love.
When you're young, you have short relationships. You learn what it is to feel things for people. Over time, the ability to feel and recognize those emotions matures and grows.
The level to which someone can love someone else at 15 doesnt compare to 5 years later, 10 years later. Its a shallow love. "Youre interested in me and I'm interested in you and it feels good" kind of thing. Later in life theres more commitment and feeling behind that.
Your parents are right to a degree. Rarely does teenaged love last. Why?
Because people change. You fall in love with someone, and a few years later they are a different person. And without alot of maturity its difficult to grow with your partner's changes. Adults are more formed. When you are in your 20s, you are more of who you will be for the rest of your life (infinitely more) than you are at 15-16.
Are they completely right? Can you make it work? Sure you can. Will you both want to forever? I cant say. That could change on either side.
My parents started dating at 15, got married at 20, and had me at 24. Looking back, I think that they don't wish they had waited, but they know that had they waited they might not have ended up together. They committed to each other and changed alot after that. My mother made comments about how my father was very, very different from the man she married when I was a teen.
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Ok, well, I'm 15. And I found these two guys that I really, really like. The one's 24, and I know it's illegal for us to do anything like sexual or anything, but it's not about that. If he does make it that, I will stop it. The other guy is 17. And I know the choice seems so easy, that I should go to the guy that I can actually date, but I can't get it out of my mind; what if he's the One or something like that? I actually really feel he could be the One, but like I said, I'm 15, could it work? (link)
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If he is 24 and interested in you, there is something wrong with him. No matter how much you want to think otherwise, age is never just a number. At 9 years older than you he SHOULD be vastly more mature. At 24 if hes not dating women 18 or older theres probably a reason, he probably cant win the interest of girls who are supposed to be dating guys his age.
He is in or out of college and possibly supporting himself, and you are in high school. He is at an age where sexuality is often assumed in relationships. You are at an age where you might not or probably have not had sex. You are worlds apart.
Also, there is no such thing as "the one" for ANYONE. Some people are compatible with who you are at a given time. Other people will be compatible with you later. The fact that you are interested in him (not having been dating him for a while) and think he could be the one proves it. You dont know what "the one" is. You just daydream of possibilities and the 24 year old can seem to fill possibilities better.
At 15 you arent old enough to even have a clue as to what you are going to want in a partner or a husband. Go with the 17 year old guy who is about in the same place you are.
And don't encourage the 24 year old. He needs to grow the hell up and not be talking to 15 year olds like this.
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I am 19, and i'm working with this guy who a few days ago said, 'i'mma **** u up." and yesterday he puts his arm around me saying, "this gone be my girlfriend when she get older." to a group of co-workers. He's 26 or 27, and he does these little things that shows he might like me, like I catch him looking and he waves from time to time, and give weird looks at me. We joke around and pick with each other a lot but I was confused by what he meant that day. (link)
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Hes physically attracted to you, thinks you're too young for him, and is himself incredibly immature.
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Okay, so you know know how Angelina had that whole vial of blood thing? What's the psychology behind it? And why do some people like to physically hurt their lovers, like scratch them, not like beat them or something, like during sex. It's a weird question, I know. But I was just wondering what is the psychology behind it? (link)
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For some people, there is a blurry line between pain and pleasure. They enjoy things that hurt just a little bit in an erotic manner.
I couldnt even begin to start quoting you psychology.
Examples, I know plenty of girls who like light biting. It hurts and feels good at the same time.
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I'm going out with this guy... Its been two days, and we haven't kissed outright... However, he likes to kiss my neck. He touches me in these little ways that turn me on, and I didn't even know I could feel like that. :) But still... is there anything weird about that? (link)
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Hes intelligent. The neck is one of the biggest weakpoints you have. Hes just exploiting it.
Neck kisses are how I get my girlfriend to agree to everything from sex to buying a new laptop.
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Hey, My friend is having a tough time convincing her mother she's still a virgin (she's not).. but the problem is that the boy.. well man.. is 24 and she's 16. But, anyway, that's not the issue at stake. She was thinking about telling the gyno that her hymen was broken by a tampon, not a penis. But I'm not even sure if that's possible. Can it be broken by a tampon? Also, can being fingered break it?
Thanks so much
xo (link)
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::Edit::
Your friend needs to realize that her mother cant force this. Your friend has a right to speak privately to her doctor. All she has to do is say "No mother, you can't come in with me" and follow it with "I'm not going to talk to the gyno in front of you"
Her mother can't force the issue, your friend can simply tell the gyno that she would like to speak to him/her alone and your mother is refusing. Usually a gyno will have a conversation with the parent and ask them to leave.
::close edit::
Yes, she can claim a tampon did it.
Worst case, she can say she used a brush handle or something to masturbate.
When the gyno visit comes, your friend should tell her mom that she wants to go into the Gyno's office alone. Reasons can include wanting to be grown up, she doesnt need mommy to hold her hand, none of mom's business, embarrassed to talk about that stuff in front of mom, have questions about period (and embarrassed about it), etc.
The gyno should be told the truth when alone and told that she should not disclose the fact that your friend is sexually active to your mother.
A sidenote, a guy being 24 doesnt automatically make him a man.
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okay i had sex on the 12th and ive been on the pill but last month i went out of town and left my pack well i missed 3 days in a row so i had to start over like how it says below, and then i got my period on the 3rd and had sex the 12th. well during sex the condom broke and he came and we didnt notice until he pulled out way after he came. do you think there is a chance i could be pregnant? Couldnt get ec, im under 18.
My birth control INFO:
If you miss 3 or more white active pills in a row during the first 3 weeks:
If you are a day-1 starter, throw out the rest of the pill pack and start a new pack the same day; or, if you are a Sunday starter, keep taking 1 pill every day until Sunday. On Sunday, throw out the rest of the pack and start a new pill pack that day. You may become pregnant if you have sex on the days when you missed pills or during the 7 days after the missed pills, so you must use a backup form of birth control for those 7 days. You may not have your period that month, but that is expected. However, if you miss your period 2 months in a row, call your healthcare provider to rule out pregnancy. (link)
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Chances are low.
If there was birth control in your system then the chance is low. Depending on alot of factors I cant even begin to get into, it could be fully effective or it could have not been very effective.
You had sex after a period, that lowers your chances.
You SHOULD be fine. Give it a month and take a pregnancy test to be sure.
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15/f - freshman.
Honestly, I'm scared of high school and college. Right now, I attend 9th grade at a junior high. I'm excited for the 'new experiences' in high school that I really didn't get a chance to accomplish in junior high. There's a lot of pressure on me to be a doctor, nevertheless, I have a cousin who is 22 and received a scholarship for a state college, and graduated with straight A's. Everyone in my family expects me to grow up and be like her. And I DO want to be like her. She's extremely smart, pretty, the like. However, sometimes I get nonchalant, and just plain lazy, and don't do my homework until later that night [I usually do it after I come home from school]. I'll do about as much as I feel like, and leave the rest for study hall [which is usually just a science worksheet].
I want to find a major that would be good and beneficial for me.
I'm:
- great with computers, great with figuring out how to set up 'gadgets'.
- fluent in Spanish
- fluent in Russian
- fluent in English [of course].
- a [very] driven tennis player
- a great listener
- good at Math
Yeah, kind of random, I know. I have this minor fear of just ending up in a community college, with only a high school graduation to my name. But I want MORE. I want to make a difference in what I do. I want my family to be proud of me and say "wow, she's really come a long way". I'm terrified of by the time SAT's come around, because I don't do so well on test taking days. I told myself that I'll do better Second Semester. I've been doing extremely well in Math, but Science is my worst subject as of now. The funny part is, is that I do better in Spanish than I do in English! I had a 83% in English, and a 98% in Spanish, last semester.
This was kind of a huge combination of fear/anxiety/and questions rolled into one. A pep talk would be great.. I want to be focused more on the present than the future. I talked with my school counselor, and he told me to choose what I would want to do, because it's my life, and only I can control it. I'm comprehending that part, but how do I stop worrying so much about the future, and start focusing on the present? (link)
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Most people change majors 1-3 times in the first two years of college.
You dont need to pick a major. Pick an area of interest, take a class in it, and take the rest of your hours in basics like english and government and whatever college math. If you don't like that class, it can be an elective credit for something else.
I tried electrical engineering, computer science, and a few others before settling on psychology (I know, far afield)
I learned that I hate engineering and while I enjoy programming I couldnt sit in a cubicle all day writing computer code as a job. I'm heading more towards teacher and eventually psychiatrist and counselor.
High school is just something to get through. Keep your grades high, and enjoy it as much as possible. College you dont have to know exactly what you want to do as you go in. Don't set doctor for yourself unless you're sure its what YOU want to do every day as a career.
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I'm 17 and I'm' a girl....So me and this guy starting dating 3 months ago (he's my first serious boyfriend) and I really like him. We took it slow phyically but the last time I saw him we were making out and that lead to him almost fingering me. I stopped him before it got to that point but he was headed there and it scared me. I made a promise to God that I wouldn't have sex before I was married and I intend to keep that promise. I feel as though I should hate him and break up with him but he's such a sweet guy it's like I can't break up with him. He knows I've considered breaking it off and all he can do is be sweet about and tell me that it's my choice. Basically if I break it off I'm going to be the "bad guy" because he's just so sweet. From a christian perspective, because he tried should I break it off or not? I mean if the attraction between us is so strong that it is causing us to sin then should I be with someone that I cause to sin and they cause me to sin? (link)
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Yes, you would be the bad guy if you broke up with him.
He stopped. Apparently without any fighting or being upset. He was understanding and as soon as you said no it sounds like he respected that.
A guy who is that mature and you want to throw him away? Stupid move.
Heres a newsflash honey. Running from him isnt going to get rid of your own desires and temptations. "If the attraction is so much that we might sin should I leave?"
Are you kidding? NO you should NOT leave. You should grow up just a bit and control yourself. If you dont want to have sex then DONT. You definitely arent mature enough for it regardless.
Waiting till marriage... well thats your choice. I don't agree, but I'm not going to argue it or anything because not all paths are meant for everyone.
But IF that is your decision don't throw away a decent guy because you realized what it is to be horny and it scares you a little. Being christian doesnt make you any less human or any less horny (unless you're just completely fucked in the head) and part of having morals is having the self control to uphold them.
Suck it up and stay with him.
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Ok. It was a friday night, he asked me did I want to go back to his house for a little QT. I only been going out with him for 2 weeks, I know it was so stupid of me to sex him but he kept asking and he was like I needed to trust him. Well, yeah I had sex with him and I regret it because after we had sex he walked me right back home(this was right after the sex)he used a trojan condom also...(for detail of the condom).Of course his penis was huge so I dont know if this is why Im feeling this way. But when I used the bathroom once I got straight in the house, I hear something hit the toilet water. It was the condom! It popped! He said before he even came, he pulled out...I cannot be sure of that. exact words (well, I didnt cum inside you). Im not sure If I am pregnant and Im trying to think that Im not, but I keep on thinking about it. Im not to sure but I do think that the condom was still on the outside inside me, and I do not think the sperm ws in the condom. I even seen him take the condom off before we left. So I know it popped. For the whole weekend. My body was hurting. My hips, Legs, Stomach, on top of that, I was really tired. I mean I was already tired on friday, But after sexing him, I was exhausted. Could it be that I was just getting used too his large penis size? Or Am I pregnant?. Because my stomach feels tight(sometimes). Really it has only been 7 days since it has happened. And right now, Im fat but im not big boned, Im slim kind of fat, I cant tell any kind of signs. I know its early but they say something about your stomach getting hard. Well I checked and I cant tell if it is my stomach getting tight because of my diet(not really a diet, just dont eat as much anymore)or because this is a sign or being pregnant. What could I possibly experience in the first week that would actually let me know that I am pregnant. I do not think that I am. but it worries me, feel me? Im only 17 and Im not ready for a child. This is the first time this has happened to me. Because I do not have sex. Could someone help me? If you need more information let me know. (link)
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Its possible. Only a pregnancy test after you miss a period can know for sure.
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k. 15/f i have heard that some of my friends have their dogs like their va jay jays. how bad is this for u? i mean. isnt a dogs mouth cleaner than a humans? so isnt it cleaner if a dog eats u out and not a guy? (link)
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We have a winner for the most fucked up question of the month.
No. Seriously, just no.
Your friends are some seriously screwed up people.
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About 5 days ago, my boyfriend and I had sex. We used a condom, but when we were finished, we noticed it had slipped off and was still inside of me. I immediately pulled it out of me but my boyfriend says it was empty. And I know my boyfriend ejaculated, he said he did. However, I've been on birth control for about 2 years and I also took an emergency contraceptive, "the morning after pill" about 4 hours after we had sex. The pill I took was called Plan B and required me to take 2 pills. One immediately, and one 12 hours later, which I did. Lately, I have been feeling extremely nervous and hungry, even after I have just eaten my stomach feels empty again. Also, my heart beats appears to be beating faster lately. I am not supposed to get my period for another 2 and a half weeks either, so I cannot take a pregnancy test any time soon. But my question is, how likely is it that I am pregnant? The condom also had spermicide on it by the way. Please help! I'm 17/f. (link)
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Zero Chance.
Mathematically speaking, the fractions of a percentage point of chance are insignificant. It would take an act of God.
Birth control (taken as regularly as I'm sure you do) is already very effective. You ALSO took plan B 4 hours after.
Add spermicide on the condom, and the overall chances are like one in a few hundred thousand.
You are feeling nervous because you are worrying yourself to death. Heart rate increases are also due to being very nervous and stressed out. You are mentally creating your own symptoms.
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My boyfriend's parents are divorced because few years ago, his dad cheated on his mom and later she did the same too. But they still live together to raise him. If his father did that, would my boyfriend be like his dad in the future? I am worried about this in a way because i know he is being faithful to me but there's a saying "Like father, like son." You just never know what would happen later in the future. (link)
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Its really entirely up to him. He could choose either way, same as anyone. His parents having done it sets him a bad example but then he might learn from it rather than emulate it.
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14/f
i slept over my family friends house (girl, my age) and we were watching a movie with her brother (2 years older). she fell asleep and me and her brother were watching. and then he was kissing my neck, and we then started making out. then it kind of got carried away and we went into the basement, and he wanted to go really far but i just let him feel me up. i dont like him at all.. but my question is, should i tell my family friend, because that would completely change our relationship and awkward between me and him, and i want to avoid it..
youre first reaction is probably going to say to tell her, but try putting yourself in my position.. its really hard. thanks in advance (link)
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No, you shouldnt.
In truth, its not really her business. It would hurt the relationship.
What would be the point? You hurt her, you hurt you. If you feel guilty about it, thats your burden to bear. If you like being friends with her, don't fuck it up.
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ok well im gona be giving my boyfriend a blojob soon or i think im gonna and well ive heard many rumors that you can get pregnant from swallowing cum is this true?
and like is it ok to just keep doin my thing while it comes out or will it like idk and is it gross?
(link)
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If you didnt know that you can't get pregnant from giving a blowjob you are too young to be naked around anyone else.
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hmmmm..im thinking wether or not to have sex with somone i dont really like. but he likes me. what do you think? (link)
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No, you shouldnt.
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I'm in high school, 15/f, a freshmen and it seems like everyone in my school besides me drinks and does drugs. I will NEVER drink or do drugs because it ruins your life...but at lunch one day, my friends were all talking about how they went to one of my friends house, let's call her A, and how A's mom was home and they still got away with drinking vodlka and beer and getting crunk together. Only one of my friends had a sip of vodkla and nothing else at the party but all of the sudden I was sooo mad. The day before the party, my friend who only had a sip of vodlka [lets call her F] was like, to A, "yeah, I'll have a drink, and I'll get close to drunk." and A was like, "F! I am sooooo proud of you! You don't know how proud I am of you that you are going to get drunkk!" and I got sooo mad at that I just bursted out and said to A, "Why is that something to be proud of?!" and A was like, "Because F swore off everything remotley related to drinking and drugs, so I am sooo proud of her that she even said that right now." and I was like, "well, I'm not going to drink and I'm not doing drugs." and everyone at the lunch table just looked at me except for my other friend, lets call her S, agreed with me. Then I didn't go to A's party and Monday I heard some pretty bad stories like of the people getting drunk and how they got it all on video...it like made me mad.
I'm mad, and I thought higher of my friends and now they all think I'm a loser, except for F and S, because I don't want to drink and do drugs. What should I do? any comments will be greatly appreciated and thanks ot all of you who read all of that because I know it was confusing and long.
(link)
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Ugh.
Children.
See, heres the problem. Drinking and Drugs dont ruin your life. Idiots who drink alot and do drugs ruin their own lives.
Thats something to make clear. Every one of your friends is responsible for themselves. The things they are doing aren't ruining their lives for them, THEY are ruining their own lives, drugs and alcohol are just the chosen method.
Now. Something to firm your resolve.
Your friends are children. In maturity, in action and thought. A little insight into how they think.
They have associated drinking and doing drugs as something "adult". And so, they want to be adults and imitate adult behavior without any understanding of what you're supposed to be doing. The same way, drinking and drugs are something that many people (like you) dont see as a good thing. And so the people who choose to do these things all convince themselves that what THEY are doing is right and that you are wrong, and they reassure themselves that they are right when they convince someone else to do what they do.
In simpler terms, they feel better when they know other people are doing what they are doing because they can't all be wrong, right?
Well, they can be. They are.
Intoxicants are something people do for a variety of reasons, but the reason adults are allowed to do these things and kids arent, is because adults are fully formed (or are supposed to be). Adults pay rent, maintain their own independent lives, possibly take care of children. For people who have their shit together enough to handle these things, intoxicants are something that can be enjoyed responsibly.
Children, on the other hand, havent and cant do these things. Your friends arent working and paying their own bills. They cant maintain their own lives. Its important for someone to learn to be a whole person WITHOUT habits like drugs and alcohol.
Its made worse by things like camera phones and the like. Now people get fucked up and record it and think its wonderful. Someday some of these friends will be sitting there trying to decide between rent and the next drink or baggie, and make the wrong decision, and have to get bailed out or lose a house. Or lose a job because they just couldnt stay sober enough to wake up on time for work every day. Etc, etc.
Its not the substances that are evil. Its people's habits of doing them without regard to maintaining a life and being responsible that is.
You are right. Someday, you will be able to enjoy a drink, even get a little drunk, without putting yourself in danger. Theres nothing wrong as long as everything is approached responsibly. But now is not the time and it speaks very, very highly of you that at 15 you can recognize that and stick to it.
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okay so me and my boyfriend have been dating for a couple years and we both decided we were ready for sex. we tried but the problem was he couldnt really get it up. he's 17 he should be able to... when finally did get it up it was last a few minutes then it would be gone again, he never came.
i don't really know what to think. I am not trying to sound conceited but im not really unattractive, i have a nice body because i work out alot and a cute face and we're really in love so i dont really understand how he is having so much trouble getting turned on...
i've done everything i can think of, i've given him head and he said it felt good but the feeling just kind of went away before he came. i've asked him to tell me what feels good and he said i was already doing it right but obviously it isnt working! i wore sexier underwear and done little things that generally turn guys on like kissing his body, touching him, teased him or just kind of went for it, set the mood - nothing works
so, question #1
is my boyfriend just not attracted to me? what can i do to turn him on? i ask him and he says im doing everything right but i cant be....
question #2
guys, what REALLY turns you on? (link)
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Oi.
Both decided we're ready for sex tells me hes probably a virgin.
Even if he isnt, its probably performance anxiety. He might be somewhat undersensitive. Contrary to popular belief not all guys can orgasm from oral.
His head is in the way of his penis. Spend more time around him naked. Hang out naked. Get him used to it, get him relaxed, its going to take time to work his nerves down.
I know its not specifically what you asked, but I doubt very seriously that the problem is that he's not turned on.
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When i wake up i wake up with a bonar every morning..howcome? (link)
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Oi.
Normally, morning wood is caused by a full bladder, which puts pressure on the prostate. The prostate, being an organ with many pleasure neurons, causes erection.
Its an interesting side effect that a firm penis blocks off access of the bladder to the urethra, making it more difficult to piss.
So, basically your bladder gets really full and your body is designed so that if you're sleeping it causes an erection which makes it easier for your sleeping body to avoid wetting the bed.
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i understand the basic concept. its like s bunch of friends, well more like sisters but i still dont know the details.
-how do you get in one
-do you all live together
-how many people are typically in one
-how do you find out about them
-what do you do
-is it like a bad thing?
-do you hook up with the frats
-is there anyway to tell that someone is in one
(because im always at a small college to see my family member play hockey and i want to know if i can tell if anyone is in one.)
i just like want a summary any details (link)
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Sororities.
I'll state at the beginning of this that I have a bias. I hate frats and sororities. They represent a social structure I have come to hate, and a large number of them are little more than social networks for parties and sex.
Also, if you see me say "frats" assume I mean "fraternities and sororities". Its simply easier to write the one abbreviation.
That being said, they arent ALL bad. And all the members even of the worst frats and sororities don't conform to the stereotype set by their greek organizations.
How do you get in one?
You rush. There is an application period every year or every semester for people to show that they want to be a part of a sorority or frat. Rush involves different things, but usually going to the house, spending time with members, and kissing alot of ass.
Do you live together?
The most common set up is that you can live in the house the first year or two. Usually there are some older members but its far more common for frat or sorority members to live away from the house, especially juniors/seniors and grad students.
How do you find out about them?
Usually they have people around advertising, depends on the size of your college. I live near a major university so we have a ton of greek houses and usually there are representatives. Word of mouth as well, if you are interested ask around.
What do you do?
Varies very, very widely. In a good frat or sorority you will make connections that can serve you later, meet people whom you can have connections with through friendship or possibly business later in life. You might do community service, or something of that nature, or simply be part of a specific community. An example, a few friends of mine are part of an exclusively Jewish fraternity. They participate in various jewish community events, sometimes joining with the wider residential community centers.
The other side (where the stereotype comes from) is that they party. Most frats and sororities do. Some gain reputations as "party frats or sororities". These are the houses that have created the frat stereotype.
They drink, and have sex, and pass VD and abortions around, and generally have alot of fun making alot of terrible decisions.
Do you hook up with frats.
See, heres where the stereotyping comes in to play. Should you hook up with frats? Hell no. Why would you have so little respect for yourself as to hook up with some drunk asshole who gets laid by getting girls like you drunk and then sending them down the "walk of shame" the next morning.
There are alot of frats at my school, and because we are also one of the top party schools in the nation most of them are the kind that give frats and sororities a bad reputation.
Alot of the frats here serve no purpose other than to provide organization for parties, and alot of the sorority chicks go to parties to get drunk and get used by fratboys. Ive known girls who spent every weekend in a different fratboy's room.
Ive been to frat parties that amount to the guys standing in groups eyeing the girls trying to figure out which ones are drunk enough to try to make a move on while the girls drink trashcan punch and have fun getting blackout drunk and having friends tell them what they did the next day.
Is it possible to tell that someone is in one?
If they are wearing their greek letters probably. Some people do, some dont.
A word of advice. If you choose to join one, choose carefully. And have enough respect for yourself to not become another bleached blonde drunk girl who gets used.
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