I’m a 13 year old girl and I know I’m over weight but I’m trying really hard to be healthy but it’s really hard when whatever I do my brother calls me a fat ass or some other form of fat shaming and my mom does nothing. I often get in trouble if I say anything about it but I can’t just sit there and let him say those thing to me. Im already very self conscious about my weight and he makes me feel even worse. What can I do to make him stop?!?
Dragonflymagic answered Wednesday May 16 2018, 11:36 pm: Sorry to hear your mom is no help. What about Dad if there is one? If not, the best thing you can do is to not react or show that it hurts.
When people call others names, they do it because to them there is a pay off, something they get out of it. They get temporary enjoyment from making someone else suffer.
So no matter how you feel inside, realize he's the one with the problem and take away his enjoyment by joining in with him. You can try agreeing with him with a smile. Yes, I know I have fat to lose. But that is a change that is possible. Unfortunately there is nothing that can be done to change your problem. Give him the same answer every time and mention there's nothing that can help him. But don't try to explain to him unless he gets curious and asks.
Then you can tell him the following: In psychology, its a known fact that a person who already feels low about their self will try to lower how other people feel about themselves in order to feel better. Usually when a male does this, he is trying to overcompensate for having really small genitals and that is what nothing in the world can fix. Then just give a saucy smile and walk away. Try not to do this when Mom is in hearing distance. Even if she does nothing when he says something to you, she might just react to you saying back. Its not fair but not all parents figure out how to do the right thing and its not your job to teach her so make sure she doesn't catch you doing this. Even if your brother is younger than you, not older, he will soon be concerned about how his genitals looks and he will remember what you said. [ Dragonflymagic's advice column | Ask Dragonflymagic A Question ]
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