|
Is my best friend right about my religion being phoney?
First off, she didn't straight up say it was phony, she just said "You're not even Jewish". She said that because in Judaism they believe that you're only Jewish if it was passed down to you through your mother and my mother was Roman Catholic where as my dad was Jewish.
Throughout my last two years of college I've been trying to get closer to my Jewish faith because I've just always considered myself Jewish. Though my mom tried to raise me Christian she always did it in a forceful way which of course made me turn away from it. I also just believe more of the basics of the Jewish faith than the Christian faith.
I've struggled with it though because unlike many Jewish children, I was never put in a Jewish education program and never had a bat mitzvah. I was never really taken to Synagogue except for maybe on a few occasions, but was frequently taken to a Jewish family center for a while when I was a child. However as I grew older all of that stopped and my dad distanced himself from the religion.
Last summer I was supposed to go on a birthright trip to reignite my faith, but it fell through last minute due to money issues so now I feel even more lost (though I hope to try again this coming summer).
I just moved recently so I wanted to get involved at a local Synagogue, but was feeling stressed about it because it seems like most synagogue members have all of the Jewish education already and are "real Jews" who went to Jewish school, had bat(or bar) mitzvah's and were raised in a Jewish family who celebrated all the holidays and prayed in Hebrew, etc.
When I was telling my best friend about my struggles with it that's when she said "You're not even Jewish". I tried my best to brush it off, but it keeps circling around in my mind.
Technically, she's right I'm not even a real Jew. Now I'm wondering if I'm just a big phony who convinced myself that I'm something I'm not and if I should just give up the act already and consider myself agnostic. I do believe in a god, but I don't believe that the bible was right about everything and technically I can't be a Jew because it wasn't passed to me through my mother. So I'm not really either am I? So does that make me agnostic then?
I'm so lost and confused. I feel like I've been lying to myself my whole life and that I'm really just pathetic for trying to cling to a religion that I'm not allowed in.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Your religion is your decision. Have you heard about messianic Judaism? These are Jew's who came to know and believe in Christ. It is my personal opinion, but I think that you may learn a lot by researching Messianic Judaism.In time, you will learn through experience that even best friends do not truly know you, but your quest to know your God will define you. There is hope in belief. But there is faith in knowing and learning about the one and only true, living God and you are learning.
]
I also had a father who was 100% Jewish blood and my mother who was not. They lived in Germany during Hitlers reign. Dads grandparents attended synagogue but a great many who could see what was coming, did not go to synagogue but attended Lutheran or Catholic churches instead to avoid drawing bad attention to themselves. They survived wartime and came to the U.S.
When it came to geneology, and with school, you know at some point kids have a project of having to chart out what they know of their lineage, I knew I was half Jewish and Half German blood wise. Although my Dad loved the Jewish faith and the ceremonies, us kids were raised Lutheran and the parents both at later points became Christian. Dad had been away too long to feel he even fit in a synagogue and was not fluent in the language as it wasn't spoken either in Germany as he was being raised.
I have heard all the same silly arguments you've heard. I ignore them. Ones geneology and ones religious beliefs should be two different things . I believe my blood line shouldn't dictate what religion I can belong to or not. I have chosen the Christian faith. However Dad late in life found a Jewish-Christian church. He invited his grown children to come visit. It reminded me a little of synagogue and a little of church and observed and celebrated all Jewish holidays and beliefs and that meant a lot to my Dad.
I have gotten into debates with people, trying to explain that I didn't care of Mom wasn't jewish, I got the Jewish blood from Dad and that made me Jewish. They are holding onto beliefs so old that no longer count in modern day times. Do you even know why it was important that Dads heritage was discounted? Because without blood tests, gene tests and paternity tests and birth control back in past centuries, there was no way to prove a childs heritage on Dads side, only Moms. Someone could have raped or forced Mom before she met Dad and was carrying a child at the time she married, or what if she had a lover on the side?
This is the same outdated system used still today in some parts of the world that require a female to be virgin at birth. OR worse, to have a show of blood and not all virgins do. For the very same reasons, that were needed back then but are not needed now due to todays technology. All the Jews and non Jews who hold to this way to determine if one is of Jewish descent or not are just plain old idiots. It has become more of a tradition than practical. Just keep searching until you find the place of worship that makes you feel welcome and doesn't keep bringing up the fact that only your Dad was Jewish. Things like this need to change with modern times but haven't and it is very sad.
]
There is nothing to say you cannot practice the religion you wish. Technically speaking though you are not Jewish by birth,, That can be corrected if yo9u wish by speaking to a Rabbi. I don't know everything it entails other than part of it includes taking a ritual bath.
Ivanka Trump was not Jewish but converted to Judaism so she could marry her husband who practices the more Orthodoxed form of the religion. Now that she has converted she is accepted as Jewish and so are her children even though she was born by a mother of another religion.
There are three major forms of Jewish Religion practiced; Orthodoxed, Conservative and Reformed. Chose which form of the religion you wish to follow then find a Rabbi with a temple for that type of congregation and go speak with him. If the Rabbi is not available when you visit the Temple speak with the Cantor.
]
It's OK to be confused about it as the question of faith cannot be easy to answer. Each religion modifies in the modern world and goes through some changes, otherwise it can hardly survive. It all lies inside of your heart, you believe what you consider right for yourself. Whether it is Agnosticism or Judaism the only person who can choose the side is you. If you have some troubles with your mother's Catholic line you can talk to your local Rabbi, they are usually understanding people who can help you manage with such problems.
]
More Questions: |