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Me and My Cousin
I started to have a crush on my cousin but he's gay. I feel like I can talk to him about anything, that's why I like him. Is it a sin to go out with your cousin? Were not,gonna have sex just dates and stuff. Please help. I'm only 14.
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That's so gross...I had that problem at the age of 8 ,9 maybe 10 and I found out he was my cousin but that's gross...hes gay? That's really gross
..sry.I dont have any advice :)
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I have to agree with the other other here on something. Its completely normal to feel that way when you have a person (weather it be a family member or not) to associate feelings of what you know so far as love for this person because of the fact that you can talk to them about anything.
BUT what that feeling is right there is a usually what a great friendship is, not a relationship that HAS to lead to a sexual one. It seems to me like your confused a little bit here about what the difference is between a friendship or kinship with a close family member and what is considered a deep friendship with a person that just happens to be related to you by blood. These are two completely different things that you need to figure out for yourself in your own mind are.
IT sounds like you have a great friendship with a family member, and that you just like to do things with them alot. thats all, and youve developed what you perceive as a love feelings for him because you are thinking that this is the kind of understanding that ONLY comes with someone who is your partner AKA a spouse. This could not be further from the truth.
A great friendship is full of all the same understanding, and loyalty and communication that a partner would have, (or should have and what you should be looking for in life) just hold the sex part for only your partner not a friend. see?
So your "dates" arent the KIND of dates your talking about, their just you and your cousin CHOOSING to spend time together which theres nothing wrong with so long as it DOESNT turn sexual.
Him being gay doesnt really come into play here because hes family and you dont have sex with family. It will create problems within the family should the rest of them find out and not take it well. Things could go badly down the road. During family gatherings in the future, should you "grow out of this" and are ashamed and realize you "made a mistake" doing that kinda thing and neither one of you wanna see each other again because of it and no one knows why, then youll have people asking questions and investigating what happened with each of you in the past, and its just not a road you wanna go down. It can break families apart from the inside BECAUSE of the fact that its so frowned on. Not only that but if hes gay and your not and you try to make a move on him you'd be disrespecting his boundaries as a person, and it would cause irreparable damage to the friendship and it could never recover.
good luck ; )
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Some people might tell you it is a sin to date your cousin. I would say as long as the date is strictly platonic there is nothing wrong with the two of you dating each other.
When I was a bit older than you I had a cousin my same age. When one of us needed a date for an evening and did not have one we would help the other out by being their escort, if we could. We did this often enough that for major family events such as weddings we were not given the option of plus one until we were in our twenties. The host simply paired us up.
My advice is don't worry about what others might say. If you enjoy his company then go out with him. He is a safe date for you and you for him.
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You don'y mention if you are a guy or a girl, or how old your cousin is.
If he's gay, and you are girl, then you need to respect the fact that he's gay. It's okay to have a crush - it's even normal and healthy when you are young to have crushes on people who are unattainable and where there is no risk of them sharing your feelings. It's not wrong to feel sometimes, but sometimes it's not respectful to act on a feeling.
I don't know what you faith is, so I can't speak to sin, but it's generally frowned on to date a cousin, especially one you've had a close family relationship with while you're growing up.
The best thing for you to do is to appreciate the friendship you have. You don't need to 'go and on dates and stuff' to talk to him and be good friends to one another.
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