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Where is this going in our "friendship"
Okay , so I'm starting off by saying that i met this girl exactly six months ago and we started off as friends and we got close like i know her life she knows mine and we just care about each other soo much and we don't let people break up our friendship and keep in mind were friends and we never did anything never kissed (etc) but recently on thursday we kissed for the first time and we were just hanging out and then we started making out and then at random times we stopped and then ill be on my phone texting my friends and then she moves my chin to her lips and we started making out again and then after of an hour of making out and messing around we was leaving so i put on my shoes and she was on the bed just sitting and i had to check the bus app and i had my hand on her lap and i was sitting on a desk chair and then out of nowhere she pulled me back and started making out with me and then after that i went to go get my skateboard and leave she grabbed me back and then started making out with me. Then later on the phone she said us making out was "whatever" and mean while we were kissing we kept saying i love you and Promise you won't leave and stuff and later on she keeps saying its whatever and i think that she doesn't care we maked out does she like me or not or is she trying to hide her emotions ?
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The making out I think almost forsure garunteers that she wants more than a friendship unless she is just the type to hook up with everyone. But even more so the saying I love you pretty much garunteers it. I think it's definitely worth it to talk to her about it and just be like did the other night chance anything for you, if. You guys are so close then if the answers no you can go back to normal but I feel like these things don't just happen without it meaning anything and things will be complicated between you two having these over your heads all he time if you never talk about it.
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I don't know either of you or the conditions of that night so I can only guess. Perhaps she or you or both of you were a little under the influence of alcohol or drugs and thats why you did what you did.
I don't see how someone can have regrets if they chose to come back for more if they were sober at the time. If she was sober, then the first make out session would have been enough to tell her that the two of you have no sexual chemistry if that was the case. If there is no chemistry, then it's not going to be all that good and a person could regret doing it. Not her, she came back for more multiple times (I am talking about a sober person here) and that would indicate it was a good enough chemistry for her to want more.
Now lets say, it's been a long time since she's been romantic, made out or had sex and she's wanting it. If after checking you out with kisses, that should have told a sober person whether there was sexual chemistry or not.
She knows shes the one who made ,most the moves on you, not the other way around and fact being that you started as best friends, she could be afraid of losing your friendship over the incidents of that night. So instead of being truthful, she simply says "oh, it wasnt important, just whatever..." She could very easily be hiding her emotions for fear of losing your friendship if you don't feel the same or perhaps her fear is due to a bad experience with a past boyfriend.
Part of the issue here is whether you actually felt anything with her, is there chemistry for you too? If you are interested in pursuing the romantic and sexual side of your relationship while maintaining the friendship part, then you will need to say something to her.
Did you know that the most successful relationship are built on two things, 1.Being each others best friend and 2. having chemistry romantically/sexually.
You know you have the friendship part down. So its really a matter of having a talk regarding the other part.
If I were you, I'd say something like,
"You know the other day when we were making out, I realized something. I felt there was chemistry at least on my part. I treasure our friendship but its a known fact that most successful relationships are ones in which the two are best friends and have sexual chemistry.
I liked what I experienced enough to want to pursue the other part. So I need you to be honest because you won't lose me as a friend over this. However, if someday, either of us meets the right one who can meet both needs for friendship and sex, that person will get more of your or my time and we won't have as much for our friendship. I don't want to lose your friendship but realistically speaking, if you actually really felt anything for me, you owe it to yourself to be willing to work on that part with me. If you don't, you will have to live with thoughts of 'what if' for the rest of your life once you or I marry another.
Mind you, this is not coercing her into anything, it is just speaking the plain simple life facts of what will happen. If she is too chicken to admit she is attracted to you that way, then don't keep yourself from pursuing other girls to date. If she becomes jealous over you having another girl, then she's fallen for you but is denying herself for some reason. This happens often in friendships where one or both are afraid to admit they want more.
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She could've regretted it and that's why she is trying to sugarcoat it, or she is just messing with your emotions. Either way I think you should confront her and ask if she sees you two going anywhere, or if that was just a mistake to her. Make sure you're not just a boy toy or friends with benefits if that's not what you want. But definitely talk to her about it.
Hope this helps~
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