Question Posted Saturday September 20 2014, 11:19 pm
Hey I'm a 14 year old girl and I feel like such a loser. I'm just so different from all of my classmates. They like to pretend that they don't care, and that they're too cool for things, and stuff like that so it makes me feel stupid when I get enthusiastic or excited about something. I also watch sci fi shows and read too many books and excel in science and history class. I correct the teacher a lot and go into long winded explanations because I get excited about the subject. I apologize too much even when I didn't do anything. I write poems that I never show anyone because not even my own mother would understand my depressed inner thoughts. And to top it all off, I have a dreadful case of social anxiety, so I replay and disect conversations in my head until my thoughts about how stupid I am eat me alive. How can I fix myself? What's even wrong with me?
Now I'm not just saying this but you really need to accept the fact that you are not a loser. In fact, the very things that make us different are also the things that make us special.
Never feel bad about your enjoyment of reading. And no, you can't ever read too much. If you love sci-fi, embrace that.
Ultimately, there's nothing wrong with you except the way you feel about yourself. And sadly, this is a common thing in teens and people of all ages.
First off, you should seek out some other people who have similar interests. Second, you could probably benefit from seeing a counselor or therapist. Last but not least, you need to change your thinking patterns that are holding you back and making you depressed. I suggest reading the book "Feeling Good" by Dr. David Burns. It has helped tons of people like you.
solidadvice4teens answered Sunday September 21 2014, 8:37 pm: Be who you are and don' give a damn what anyone else may or may not be thinking.Your personality is not something to be ashamed over. It's a good one with admirable qualities so no worries.
As far as your inner-thinking goes if it's full of anxious thoughts, dark ones, troubled thinking than no matter what don't hide that. If you have social anxiety problems make it known. Seek out professional help from a medical professional and work on these issues. Medication if they decide may help eliminate these feelings.
Anxiety disorders are an illness like any other that needs to be dealt with and doesn't mean that you are at fault for it. It doesn't mean something is wrong with who you are a a person either. You need help there and working on your self-image and self-worth as you haven't a clear view on that. Stop looking at yourself through a dirty (mental) mirror. [ solidadvice4teens's advice column | Ask solidadvice4teens A Question ]
sotheresthisbanana answered Sunday September 21 2014, 5:40 pm: oh wow, I think ive just found my twin. Im exactly the same way, and neither of us are losers. theres nothing wrong with you, you seem like a very bright girl. i can totally understand where youre coming from, as I am 13 and have the exact same issues at my school, feeling like I dont fit in. but honestly, dont worry about it. youre not a loser, youre just different from those kids, youre smart and youre into different things, who cares? flaunt it girl! Most of your classmates are probably the most boring people you will ever meet, but, you on the other hand seem very interesting. trust me, you do not want to be like them. Im in the exact same position as you are, but I stay myself. I dont try to be someone Im not. if other people dont like it, its their loss, not mine. I correct people all the time, I watch Pokemon and Adventure time, I wear way more makeup than all the other kids, I read fanfiction and Im just overall a weird kid,and oh dont even get me started on the social anxiety. but, Ive found friends who accept my weirdness and you will too. maybe talk to people you normally wouldnt talk to, you might have something in common? Id say youre way cooler than those other kids in your class, so theres absolutely no need to fix yourself, because youre fine just the way you are.. Xx [ sotheresthisbanana's advice column | Ask sotheresthisbanana A Question ]
KeewiSweeti answered Sunday September 21 2014, 12:10 pm: There's absolutely nothing wrong with you. You're intelligent and real. You can't let your superficial classmates get to you- they'll realize one day how wrong they are. Or maybe they won't, which makes it all the more sad. Either way, they're superficial and I hate to be cliche and use such at trite phrase, but their lives will end after high school. You'll be their future boss, because nerds and smart people rule the effing world. There's nothing wrong with writing poetry you never let anyone read, I do it myself. Makes me feel better. As far as the social anxiety is concerned, I understand over-analyzing things until I feel like a complete idiot. Just remember that the things eating you alive, most people probably didn't even notice. And if they did, hey, no one's perfect, right?
Also- check this site out. nerdfighters.ning.com
You may not like it, but you may also find there's a lot of people on there you can relate to, at least a little bit. DFTBA, my friend!
You can send me a message, if you want to for any reason. I check it regularly! [ KeewiSweeti's advice column | Ask KeewiSweeti A Question ]
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