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anal
hi people!
im a 19 year old girl & ive only tried anal once. from that experience im terrified to do it again.
when i did it the first time i got a hemorrhoid, disgusting yes i know! & also he cummed in my butt & when he pulled out it made a couple farting sounds but i dont think i farted? im not sure but it was embarrassing & i dont ever want that to happen again!
any suggestions or comments? thanks!
also any suggestions on how to clean your butt out before anal? because you poop there lol, i dont want anything coming out or smelling, sorry i know this sounds very out there! i just need some help!
thanks in advance and sorry about how weird this sounds haha!:)
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I get you I went through the same thing. I got hemoroids and I even bled. My husband still wants it and he knows what happens. And not to sound like a bitch but if he wants a hole that is full of shit. And the fact that any man would want to put his penis in a place that has waste bile. Yeah its not going to smell like roses or anything good smelling. And personally I feel that any man including my husband that wants that so bad should get a man because if that's really what they want let em get it lol. Don't be embarrassed or feel bad. Because you went through pain and he forgot its a poop shoot not a bleached asshole like celebs. And if you do do it again god bless you, use a condom no matter the hole because experienced men are not as smart and don't get tested. My husband had sex with a prostitute before me and his mom made him get tested. I'm just saying be safe and if he has an excuse for anything when it comes to your saftey. He ain't long term. Hope it helps lol!
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Why would you be asking for help on how to solve these problems if you had such a bad experience the first time around? Anal isn't your thing. So don't do it. It resulted in you getting a hemorrhoid, that's awful. Don't risk it again. You were humiliated by the sound of air that had been pushed in, coming back out. Knowing that it wasn't a fart doesn't make it any less embarrassing because it still sounds like one. This is going to happen when you do anal and can't really be avoided. You're worried about how clean it is in there because you don't want anything coming out or smelling. People that participate in and enjoy anal are not worried about this. Clearly, you aren't into anal. There is no reason for you to do it.
This brings me back to my question. Why would you be asking for help on how to solve these problems if you had such a bad experience the first time around? Someone is asking you to try it, right? Some guy really wants you to do it for him. Well, the answer to all your problems is to just explain to him that you're not into it. Explain that you tried it once, had a bad experience, didn't like it, and that was enough for you. Do not do this just to make him happy. You may be willing to, but even if you are, it's not the right thing to do. No part of a sexual encounter should be a sacrifice. Both people should enjoy all parts of everything that the two of you choose to do. Otherwise, it's just bad sex and sets you up for being pressured and having your generosity taken advantage of or stretched too far in the future. If this guy is worth anything, he's not going to care if you don't want to do anal. He might want to try it, but he'll certainly live without it. I'd prefer it if my husband would trim his pubic hair better than he does, but he doesn't want to and it's his body to decide that for. I really don't care about it that much and I respect what he wants to do. It's really that simple. Your need to please needs to end.
If you don't have a boyfriend asking to do this with you, I apologize for assuming so. In this case, my answer is still essentially the same. Anal isn't your thing. Don't worry about it. Communicate this to your partner and everything will be fine. BOTH of you will be happier if you do. Trust me. :) Good luck!
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I think comments from dragonflymagic sum it up. It's a case either of putting up with and getting used to the inevitable entailments of a guy penetrating your back passage. Or deciding that these entailments are something you find unpleasant, outweigh any enjoyment you get from doing it, and not have anal sex. If deciding against having anal sex upsets this or any other boyfriend I suggest you re-consider the relationship. Because if he cannot respect your wishes and compromise on something as relatively unimportant as having/not having anal sex then he will not find a long-term committed relationship very easy. (You'll certainly find much more important issues you have to resolve than this!!).
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Anal is not for everyone. Not every woman is going to love it. the only ones that are more likely to enjoy are the females who have more of the sensitivity of nerves for orgasms towards the back wall of the vagina closest to the anal passage rather than on the front wall of the body. It is these women who will experience sensations, otherwise, it isn't fun. Can hurt if you're not relaxed, and can cause hemorroids and also in me at least interfered with my being able to go #2 for a couple days, like it blocked my up somehow.
The best advice for you would be to tell your partner that you did not enjoy it, it does nothing for you and say you dont want to do it again because it caused a hemorroid too. If he pleads and begs, you say no means no and try to talk about what you both do like instead.
Yes, if you're going to be sexual with someone, you have to communicate these very personal and sometimes embarrassing facts!
One reason guys want to do anal sex is because they've heard that it is a tighter feel and the tighter grip on the penis is very pleasurable.
There is a solution to that if that is something he likes. It will take time to develop but you are going to practice squeezing your pc muscles, like the ones used to stop a flow of urine. At first I could not feel myself squeezing but when having sex imagined and focused my mind, picturing myself squeezing the penis with my vagina. Nothing happened at first but I did this every time and asked if he could feel me squeezing him. Eventually it will become noticeable to you and to him. Its easier to feel your muscles squeezing with him inside. Now I can squeeze any way I want, one long sustained or many little ones. When a guy experiences this, it's way more pleasureful and rewarding than using the anus.
As for the farting sounds, get used to it, its a part of sex sometimes. Depends on how wide open your anus or your pussy is that particular time. The mans penis then forces little bits of air in, like blowing up a balloon, so the moment he removes himself, the air comes back out in release....you have no control over this. If your guy accuses you of farting or doesnt like it, explain to him whats happening and that he is the one who caused it and your'e okay with it if he is. If he is so immature that he doesnt believe or gives you any other kind of trouble, you may wanna think twice about continueing to have him for a boyfriend and sex partner.
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