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Single Mom
I have two children. My husband walked out on us a year ago. He does not paid child support I did file. I work a full time job. Making okay money. My oldest has some disabilities. I have a boyfriend that I am not in love with. I was blessed to be able to live with family for a while. It was very crowded and pretty stressful for everyone involved. I moved out into a house close to my dad's. He takes me to work because I still haven't been able to afford a car. My kids have their own rooms now. We are walking distance from the school. I am absolutely miserable living with my boyfriend. I feel my attitude ttowards him comes off as hateful even though I don't mean to be. I don't like when he puts his arm around me and normally I love that He works he's very sarcastic I'm not judge mental on looks but I feel there has to be some kind of connection and it's just not there at all. We've talked about it I don't think I could afford to live here on my own and if I did it would be a very tight on bills. I'm just unsure of what I should do
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One doesnt even have to be a single mom to not be able to make it on ones own. After leaving my ex, I found it extremely hard to afford a place on my own.
I was faced with either compromising on my goals, and settling for something less than ideal in relationships just to have the security of a place to live and less tight budget. The first time was an abusive ex, the second time was a male friend i shared an apt with and he had his own set of issues and staying with him would be settling for less in relationship. It was an important lesson for me to learn. It seemed I had learned with leaving the ex because my own wellbeing and mental and physical health was more important to me. What I did not realize until the 2nd situation is that we get tested in life to know whether we really learned our lesson the first time or whether it was a fluke. I broke up with the 2nd one and left facing no place to live, my kids all grown but with no place of own to take me in, but God does take care of you and a friend offered me a place to live until I could find a place I could afford.
If you know you can't afford a place on your own, why not find a relative who might share a place to rent together, large apt or a house. There's always the possibility of renting with a girlfriend, or advertising to find perhaps a college student who needs a room but cant afford their own place in full either.
Try that before settling for staying with someone that deep down, you are not attracted to or feel any chemistry with.
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Hey there.
I know the stress of being a single mom is pretty awful. My sister is a single mother of two handsome boys, (3 and 5), and it's stressful on her two. I understand you can't afford living on your own but being in a relationship just because you can't afford to dump the person is not a good thing.
So, tell him the truth. Ask him if he'd let you stay at his place for about a month or two and try looking for a job with a good pay. It's really not healthy for the kids to be around that kind attitude between adults.
Move out whenever you can and start doing things on your own. That's what being a mom is.
Best of luck!
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IF you filed for child support and your ex husband is not paying then you need to take him back to court. You ask the court to order him to pay child support and to pay whatever he owes in back support. You also ask that the court attach his paychecks and the funds being sent to the court to distribute to you. If he fails to notify the court of changes in employment so the attachment follows he can go to jail.
Most every state has strict laws governing child support and there are federal laws as well. Contact your divorce attorney and have him bring your ex back to court to be forced to pay child support since voluntary child support does not seem to be working.
It is my belief that once the child support starts coming in on a regular bases the other problem you speak of will either be seen in a different light as a major stress has been removed or you will be able to deal with them better.
Right now you see your boyfriend as a necessary evil to deal with as you cannot live in any degree of comfort without him. Once the child support and the arrears are coming in the stress of that situation will change and so may your perception.
My advice is to call your lawyer first thing in the morning.
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