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I can't help but compare myself to his ex
21/f
He did not make me feel less pretty than her, I put this on myself. I don't think he knows that I know how she looks like. I don't think he was aware that we went to the same school and that's how I know.
I've been dating this guy for two months now and every time I see her, every time he mentions her, I can't help but compare myself to her. My friends and siblings have seen her pictures and the first thing that comes out of their mouths are, "wow! she's really pretty!" And they look at me and say, "it's okay... You're cute?" And it makes me feel worse about myself.
I know that she worked for a dog rescue, etc and I sometimes feel like he brags that he has dated a Brazilian girl... and that doesn't make me feel any better. He's told me that I'm cute and that I'm pretty, but I can't help but compare myself to her. I keep thinking that maybe he won't like me as much as he liked her or how he maybe comparing me or thinking that his ex girlfriend was prettier.
Majority of the time I'm satisfied with myself and how I look but this time it bothers me. How do I stop myself from thinking this way?
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Hi,
Just a thought...But, you might not be ready for a relationship. At least not to this person. Try to never compare yourself to anyone unless there is a competition. You will always be beautiful and you must love yourself before you can love another. You need to meet someone who likes you for everything you bring to the table. Plus, he might still like the ex if he keeps talking about her... :)
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I've had my moments of "doubt/jealously" whatever you want to call it in my relationship. My boyfriend's ex though, is my best friend. It's normal and expected to feel threatened by someone your partner has had a romantic relationship, but that's in the past. You shouldn't dwell on it. If it really bothers you, you should just talk to him. Maybe he doesn't know that it hurts you. Good luck! :)
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The operative word in all of this is "Ex." Stop bringing her into your relationship. Confidence is sexy. There's a reason he's with you. Work on your confidence in general, it will positively affect all of your relationships. You can't necessarily stop all of the thoughts you have, but you can decide what you are going to DO. So BE more confident and trust your relationship. (If it's worth trusting.)
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