|
I hate my new school
I'm a 13 year old girl and I just moved from Pennsylvania to New Jersey. I had to switch schools obviously big I hate my new school. I don't fit in, I have no friends because no one wants to talk to the weird new girl, and it's just not my home. I've gone here for a few days and everyday after school I do my homework, eat dinner, and cry myself to sleep. It's an endless cycle. I'm really depressed and I just can't do it anymore. To top it all off, my family moves every two years usually so it's not really worth making friends, but I want to go back to Pennsylvania because we ended up staying there for 4 yrs and I made some amazing friends. We can't go back because the reason we came up here is my dad's job. What do I do????? I'm so depressed!!!!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Work & School category?
Maybe give some free advice about: School?
I think you and I would be great friends if I was there.
Honestly, I've gone through this so many times. Since I was 8, I've moved to a new state and a new city twice. I always was asked if a parent was in the military. We moved so much because when my mom searched for a new job, it was in another state. I'm now 20 and after reading this, I can tell you that it's only temporary that you're feeling this way.
If I didn't like it a school, it was because I really wasn't giving it a chance and when I got used it and we had to move again, I ended up being so upset because I loved it there.
At 13, I was already in my 2nd middle school in IN which wasn't far my the school I just came from in KY. At 12, I had moved in the middle of the year and became the new girl. It was very frustrating to see people know each other so well and I was just an observer. It's not fun I know. You have to attempt to meet the kids in the school. From what I'm reading, you're actually separating yourself. That's the worst thing you can do.
Being 13, I'm sure you want a lot of friends to just talk to about anything and everything. The next day you go to school, Take just a quick moment and come out of your comfort zone. Find that one person that you think you can be really good friends with and just go with it. Don't think about it. JUST DO IT. It was weird at first, but it's totally worth it. The school that I moved to in the middle of the year, I'm still friends with that one girl that I spoke up to when I was new. Since then, I've moved to NC and started high school there my Junior year and then went to college on my own while my mom moved to WI. You're going to have to learn to just speak to anyone. Don't be scared to do it. When you get used it, honestly, it will just be second nature to you to speak to random people.
I'm now temporarily in WI and possibly moving to NJ myself. I don't like it, but just like you, I have no choice in the matter and I will have to adjust.
You'll get there I promise you. I'm sure you WILL fit in, you're just still adjusting and shy.
And you're not weird. It's perfectly fine. Starting new schools suck. But you have to do what you can. You can always message me if you want to reach out more.
Work it girl!! lol.
Good Luck.
]
Speak to your parents about how you feel, if you cannot say it face to face you can write it down in a letter and that way you can't end up in a shouting match because everything you feel is written clearly and calmly.
Now, remember you have only been there for a few days. So maybe people are just trying to suss you out. You could try and find a common interest: perhaps some kind of sport team or club that you are interested in. Whatever you like doing there are others that do too. Is it scary? Yes, of course! But you could make some friends through common interests.
You say there is no point making friends but you might stay in New Jersey for 4 years like you did in Pennsylvania. You might make some friends for a life time and having friends in different places is great; you get more chance to travel and see what different people are like.
Give your school another chance and I definitely think you should try a school activity that your interested in.
Hope this helps :)
]
Do either of your parents know how you feel? How hard it is to make friends within two yrs only to lose them again. They need to know how this is affecting you emotionally. It is important especially in ones teen years to have some continuity with building friendships and venturing slowly out into the adult world.
It sounds like your Dad has had trouble finding good stable work. Its odd that on the average it seems to happen about every 2 years. Perhaps if they know how badly it was affecting you, then Dad would try harder to find other work to remain in one area. If he did that and it still didn't work out, and moving for work is the only solution, then there's nothing that can be done to change your situation if you live with your parents. All I can think of is if the parents and relatives were willing, is to have you go live with an aunt or uncle or grandparent who is stable as far as living area and they dont move around and dad sends them money to go towards your care so you can remain in one school for middle or high school. Moving too often can be disruptive to learning in school for you. Have a talk with them. Let them know you are depressed not just sad and missing friends. Doing a move and losing friends once as a child is hard enough, but repeatedly is more than any kid can take. They really should know how severely it is affecting you because some kids who are depressed may attempt to end their life. If there is even the slightest likelihood that come become an issue, or failing to pass a grade in school or some such serious issue, they'd want to know, whether they feel they can do something to fix the situation or not. Hope it all works out.
]
More Questions: |