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Im inlove with my good friends ex!
I dont know what to do, im inlove with him i think about him all the time we text and call all the time and she has no idea.. i feel so guilty
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
There are a few different factors to take into consideration here: how long ago did they break up? Why did they break up? How long were they together? Who broke up with whom? What would you be risking? For example, is your friend the type who would feel it's a blatant disrespect of your friendship? Or would she feel okay about you pursuing a possible relationship?
A good idea would be to compare your history with your friend versus her history with this guy. Will she know you well enough to understand that you're having a moral dilemma with the situation? Will she understand that you're not taking any decision lightly?
Also, contrary to other answers I've seen to your question, if he cheated on her, don't do it. Not only would you be embarking on a relationship with a known cheater, but your friend will probably feel betrayed AND think you're insane.
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Look if they have broken up recently dont try to tell it because she may still have feelings for him but if he cheated on her go for it but be careful you may lose a friend and she migjt think that you were the reason that they broke up
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Well first of all, they are broken up. You shouldn't feel too guilty. I mean, you should have talked to her and let her know though.
In my opinion, it's fine for friends to date their ex. As long as they broke up because they just weren't compatible together. If they broke up because he cheated, lied or was abusive in some way then I don't even want to know why you're going after him.
She should be ok with you dating him. I mean some people just aren't meant to be and just because they weren't right for each other, doesn't mean that you guys aren't.
You need to have an honest conversation with her. You don't need to go into detail or anything just tell her that you guys have been texting and getting to know each other and you have feelings for him.
You might expect her to be upset or angry. Hopefully she'll come around though. Just tell her you wanted to let her know.
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I once went through the same situation with my best friend.
Here is the hard part, sometimes, we can't control our feelings. Sometimes you need to pause for a moment and think, who is your friend to you?
The simple answer is, if you care enough about her, you wouldn't have started talking to her ex in the first place. But, then again things do happen. Secondly, ask yourself, how would you feel in her position?
If you care about your friend enough, you will let him go, because honestly speaking the fact is, that us "girls" & "Guys" need to have each others backs when it comes to break ups and what not.
I am not doubting tour feelings for him, but the guilt that your feeling is telling you something, that "this is wrong."
In the end it is your choice, because to tell you the truth, once you start seeing this guy, and it one day ends, your going to look back at the past and say, "wow, I lost a good friend, because I was selfish." Also, if this guy cared about how you felt and how your friend felt he wouldn't have started anything in the first place.
Finally, there are a million fish in the sea, looking for a girl like you.
Is he worth loosing a friend?
P.s. I choice my friend, and we have been best friends for 10 years now. :)
The Choice is yours, GOODLUCK!
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People get together all the time who eventually part because they didn't have anything in common, were lacking that spark, and just weren't right for each other. Should each remain single then even if someone known to their ex is actually a good match for them? It really doesn't make sense.
However, in the case that she is in love with him but he dumped her and she is not yet over it, and she finds out you two are talking and that you are attracted, then yes, it will be a problem with her and reason for you to feel badly. You must know that knowledge of it will hurt her feelings and that is what makes you feel guilty.
She will hurt worse if she discovers by accident that you two have been attracted and in touch but haven't told her. Either way, she is likely to feel hurt unless she is the one who dumped him or they both mutually decided to part...in which case, she should not dictate whether you date him or not. Try starting by saying something like you want to start dating, or you've been looking and haven't found someone you are attracted to their looks except her ex. So you want to know what she thinks of it? Does she think its a good idea if you were to ask him out?
This is a good way to find out some things about him that may not be visible on the surface but keep in mind some of the things she has to say will be from her perspective or painted through her hurt and pain. If she goes crazy and says no way, how can you be my friend and ask such a thing...then you will be facing a decision, whether continueing to see where things will lead with him or letting how a girlfriend feels, be the deciding factor on not pursueing something in your life. If you continue on with the guy, its a matter of time before you are doing stuff together in person, but because you planted the idea in her mind, though she'll still be hurt if you're found out, it won't be quite as big a shock. If a friend really cares about their friend, they would not prevent them from being with someone just because it did not work out for them. But people get jealous, get hurt and sometimes dont go on with their lives. Its your decision to make. Just be sure he is worth pursueing, that the reason for their breakup is not due to some serious nasty character flaws unknown to you yet, that would make him no match for any female.
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Don't feel guilty about having feelings for this guy. It's okay. But here is something to consider: Why did he and your friend break up? Was it just a mutual agreement or did he do something to break her heart? The best thing to do is to see where things go between you and the guy first (don't think about him as just her ex! He is still a person!). IF you and him think things are going pretty good enough to get into a relationship, then do it. Your friend might be upset, but if she is a true friend, she will respect your wishes.
**TIP**: If you and him DO get into a relationship, it would be a good idea NOT to say things like "oh me and [insert name] did the cutest thing the other day.." or "idk why you let this one go...he's amazing♥♥"
You get me?
☺☺Good luck sweetie!☺☺
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