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Please Help! Panicking About Going Back to School!
Hello, I know this is probably a bit dramatic, but I'm nervous about going back to college and I need some advice.
I am 26 hears old and I haven't gone to school since I was 22. I dropped out after the fall 2009 semester. If I'd graduated in four years, I'd have been done in May 2010, but I know that wouldn't have happened even if I'd stayed in school. I don't know how much longer it's gonna take me to finish, but I still want to go back so I can improve my life and accomplish my dreams.
I don't want to sound like a cry baby, but sometimes my life is so boring I can't take it. I have a loser job and I've never done anything that great or noteworthy. I've GOT to do something to improve my life and keep me from being a loser forever. Not to say that anyone who doesn't go to college is a loser, but not having a degree is the only thing standing in my way of doing the things I've always wanted to do.
I plan to get a job at the museum that my university owns, which I think will be fun. I love history and I've always loved that museum. If I get the job, I'll get free tuition and be allowed to leave work to go to class. It's a great deal and I think it alone will make my life more interesting, but I'm nervous about going back to school.
I'll be going to school with people much younger than me. The freshmen this year were SIXTH GRADERS when I was their age. The seniors were freshmen in high school. What are these people going to think of me? That I'm some bum in her late 20's that's screwed around so much in the past 7 1/2 years that I STILL haven't managed to get a bachelor's degree? Or that I'm so stupid that I can't get one? Most people think I look young for my age, so my classmates may not even know that I'm that much older, but what if they do?
Nervousness isn't the only thing I'm feeling, I'm also excited and anxious to make my life more interesting, but I don't want my nervousness to get worse and make me back out of going to school. I don't think it will, but I'm still worried. Has anyone ever been in a situation like this? If so, what did you do?
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I've basically been in your situation. I started college in September 2012 at age 25, after a long hiatus due to medical issues. It's been a ride, but I can tell you that it's worth it.
You're going to notice some huge differences between you and your classmates. Chances are that now that you've been working for a while in a dead-end, minimum wage job you have a lot of incentive to work hard, get fantastic grades and excel. A lot of the 17-18 year olds I was in classes with didn't have that drive. If mommy and daddy are footing the bill, and you're just getting a taste of freedom, why would you care? Because of this, you'll get a lot more out of your education than you would have had you started right out of high school.
Yes, you might get some weird looks and it may be difficult to make friends at first. You won't have the "typical" college experience, and you probably wouldn't want to anyhow. What will happen is that you'll connect with other mature students (believe it or not, you're not the only one making this decision!) and you'll make some great friends with common goals in mind.
You also worry about being labeled as "dumb"... well, that happened to me, at least until the first midterms happened. If people do make the mistake of underestimating you, you'll be able to prove them wrong, no problem. You also have life experience that these kids won't have yet. You've already made the stupid teenage mistakes, and they'll be stuck navigating all that plus school. You have an advantage here.
I'm now halfway through my 3 year program, and it has been well worth it. I've found a group of students that I work well with who are mostly a little older than the norm. It was rough for a while getting back into the academic mindset, but knowing that there's a better future for me than dead-end retail jobs makes it worth all the struggle.
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First off lets get rid of that word loser for there really is no such word. There are people who plan to fail and people whose plans fail. You have a plan so lets make sure you have a plan that cannot fail. So far you have a great looking plan. What is needed is a contingency plan incase the job at the museum is not available.
Next I hate the word stupid and from what you have written you are far from stupid. You know for example that in order to get ahead in today's world you need that college diploma. Anyone knowing that is not stupid. If anything you are correcting a mistake you made earlier in life and you will find people older than you walking around campus correcting the same mistakes they made by not getting that degree or returning to get a higher degree.
Last who cares what other people think. I spent my whole working career in sales. Sales managers motivate by trying to focus you on money to be made. I never worried about making a sale. My focus was always on me on the fact that the only person I had to be better that was the person I was yesterday. I was not concerned if I made a sale or not today, if not I would make two or three the next day. My concern was on learning something new that I could use to help me or my customers.
Never worry about what others think of you. Your main concern is you and how or what you need to do on a daily basis to make you better that you were the day before. If we are not constantly learning we are not moving forward.
You know this because you have decided to return to school and finish your education. Just remember your education does not stop when you leave school. Always have a plan and work your plan to meet your goals. Only people who fail to plan are failures in life.
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Don't worry about being older than the majority in college, there are people of all ages attending. Some 20 yr olds look older and some 28 yr olds look younger, so dont go by looks, just work a little harder at finding someone mature enough if you need a partner for any assignments.
What concerns me is that you wrote the word "loser" 3 times in the first paragraph. While your conscious mind may not have any issues or think you are actually a loser, deep in your subconscious, there is a tape playing, a program running where this is what you really think.
I have been greatly helped by the EFT tapping technique of getting release from the emotional and thought programs that hold us back. Our emotions and feelings live in our subconscious mind. Its from there that fears, anxieties, anger, or love, etc...originate from. Therefore, working with the subconscious to find release and overcome a negative mindset with a positive one will help lots. My favorite internet person doing EFT is Brad Yates. You may go on to find someone who works better for you but at least give him a try. I am providing two links, the first explains what EFT Emotional Freedom Technique is and how the tapping parts of your upper body and face are connected as you recite what he says. The tapping sequence is always the same, it is the words that you repeat after him that change for hundreds of situations. View the ones where the title of it jumps out at you. As with most alternative, natural health techniques, many aren't recognized by the regular medical field and so many share this info without being licensed. While they have to put the disclaimers or warning down so their websites and videos are not removed, I have never experienced any bad effects, only release which often came with a jolt of recognition inside, and then sometimes a release of tears followed by a happier euphoric feeling afterwards. This is not a one time solution. It should become a routine habit, if not daily, then as often as you find time. In the beginning, for better results, I listened twice a day, when getting up and before going to bed, and he had two videos just for that too. If you do decide to try this, I'd love to hear back from you how it is working for you dear.
Explanation of what EFT tapping is
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
And the you tube channel of all his eft emotional freedom technique video's
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
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of course you're going to be nervous! You have every right to be. But this doesn't mean you should give up your goals in life. They're just young kids who are worried about their own life right now. You should definitely go back to school to make yourself, and others proud. There is a lot of adults who are in their 30's and 40's that go to college now too. Don't be too nervous, going to school is doing the right thing :)
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