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Being judged for being muslim
So I'm an Arab and a Muslim. I am not what you would think of when I said Arab. I wear shorts and am a blond with dark hazel eyes. I'm as pale as Snow White and have delicate arms but strong muscular legs(socce player) I am so tired of being judged for being an Arab or not covering up. Just today, I said I couldn't have pork because I am Muslim and asked for a salad instead( in the caf during lunch) and the girl wearing a scarf behind me said," you are not a Muslim. Cover your hair. Mabey then well accept you." And walked to her group of friends all wearing scarves. Last week a boy called me a terrorist and later thet week wrapped his jacket around his head ( imitating a scarf) and pretended he was bombing a building and said look I'm hannah!( I'm hannah) WHAT THE HECK! I am not accepted into either society. I have friends but it is still a stab in the back.i mean first off, no where in the Quaran does it say to cover your hair.it says to dress modestly ,which I do!! Islam is all about being kind to one another and to accept others. I wanna yell you're not Muslim! You are showing no acceptance! Now about the boy, Islam the actual word means peace. The people of the Taliban are not Muslim so don't connect me with them! I just feel like I am proving this to myself, am I right? Please don't judge Muslims or people in general. I just wanna say that the American Muslims are not all what you see on tv. We are regular people! We still celebrate Christmas to celebrate a prophets bday but we do not celebrate a gods or gods son bday on Christmas. We don't all look the same or talk the same. Just help me out and don't judge.
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First of all what is happening in school by the boys is a form of bullying and should be reported to the principal. You have just as much right to attend school as they do without being harassed or bullied. I hope you will report them.
What you have written is correct. The Taliban are not true Muslims. They and others like them are incorrectly interpreting the Quran for their own purpose. I'm not sure just why the Taliban dislike us. They say our way of life is wrong and that we disrespect them when we try to change their people to our way of life. I'm not sure if this is just plain jealousy speaking for what we have or if they truly dislike us because of who we are and the freedoms we and other western countries enjoy.
What is very wrong is the intolerance shown to Muslims since 9/11. While I'm am to young to know what life was like for Japanese Americans during and after WWII I believe what we are seeing in regard to Muslims at this time is very much what the Japanese Americans went through and in some regard still go through.
A friend of mine once worked for Subaru of America. On December 7, if it is a working day, the Japanese employees all stayed at their desks or in their offices and did not interact with the American employees as they would on any other work day. Why? Because the back lash of that day is still felt by many of them. There is a saying that is still said often to them; "Remember you guys lost the war."
None of this is right, in fact it is very wrong. Many of us like you know this. Unfortunately for many the hurt that caused those that feel that way runs very deep.
Alcada in the name of true Muslims killed over 3,000 people on 9/11. Among them were 343 NYFD firefighter, 50 NYPD police officers and many innocent children. They said they did this as part of their Holy war and that those people died because they were infidels. How can children be infidels.
This is what builds the hatred. Yes I hate Alcada and what they stand for. The 343 Fire Fighters that died were my brothers and sisters as I too was a Fire Fighter at the time. I do not hate Muslims in general. I can make that distinction. Unfortunately I am in the minority in that regard.
You though should not have to accept being harassed or bullied because of your heritage, religion or beliefs. Part of changing the beliefs of those who are harassing you is through education. The only way they will get that education is for you to report them to the principal for their harassment and bullying of you. This includes the girls who are harassing you to wear a head scarf.
In this country we have the right of freedom of religion and how we practice that religion. IF they do not like how you practice your religion. Well that's just tough. They do not have the right to harass you for practicing your religion as you see fit.
So my advice after this lengthy dissertation is report both groups to your principal and let the education begin.
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Being judged is inevitable. People are cruel and it sucks. Obviously, you shouldn't have to stand for it. No one deserves that kind of stuff, but you're simply going to have to ignore the people who say things like that to you.
I'd have to agree with Dragonflymagic on telling someone you're Muslim is the reason why you don't eat pork. It's really none of their business.
I'm Indian and I've even gotten terrorist jokes. It makes absolutely no sense, but it happens to me all the time. Then obviously the seven eleven jokes..
I'm also a Christian and a lot of people who weren't would actually tease me. They'd tell me all these things I wasn't doing right and all the reasons I was wrong and telling me there is no God. It's not like I was going around telling everyone there is a God and you all are wrong or something.
A lot of people are Christians, but yet it still happened to me often.
So really, people are ignorant and they don't really practice what they preach anyways. It's not just Muslims being judged, it's everyone who is the least bit different from them.
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You can be proud to be Muslim but you don't have to give 'being Muslim' as the reason in any explanations.
If I was offered pork, I'd quickly say, "No thanks, I'll take some salad instead." If they want to know why (its none of their business to ask why anyways) but if I am in the mood to answer, then i say," I am part vegetarian, I only eat certain seafood and chicken, nothing else." People accept that and never ask anything else.
I am sure they get students often enough refuse a certain food item because they are allergic to it or they simply hate the taste or texture of it.
When young people are growing up, their bodies and their sexual organs develop faster than the brain. The frontal part of brain used to make good choices and understand consequences, and to be mature, does not finish developing until our mid twenties so if you're younger than that, they likely won't grow up until they are quite a bit older and even then they still may not make the best decisions. If you are older than mid twenties, you are going to have to be patient and work to find people who are accepting of all belief systems. You probably wont find them at school. You will need to search for specific groups that have something totally different than their belief systems in common. Sometimes, you can find understanding people in groups that are also harrassed and totally misunderstood such as those of alternative sex lifestyles, gay, bi, transexual, asexual, etc... or how about Pagans and witches. I used to be Christian and now am more spiritual with a leaning toward Pagan and witches. Narrowed minded people think we are all satanists, going to hell, and christians want to save our souls, etc... even Goth people are not part of paganism but you may find them in our groups. Its a choice of how to dress and because it is different than the majority, people make assumptions without bothering to study the facts for themselves or just are lazy and choose to believe what they are spoon fed by the media.
So if I wear a pentacle necklace, there is a chance I may draw negative comments, if i announce to people constantly that i am a pagan or a witch, I will most surely find opposition and harassment.
It is not fair hon that people treat you this way. However honestly trying to explain that you are Muslim will attract negative attention, it's like waving a red flag at a bull, it is going to attack. As you well pointed out, even those who call themselves Muslim have no idea what it is to truly be one and are terrible representations of what the Quaran says it is. Heck, people are prone to misinterpret very easily and fall into grave error. The Christians are so anti pagan and yet it is a sister religion if you want to call it that. The Christian beliefs known today were formed around many pagan traditions and holidays to actually catch their interest and their conversation much more easily and it worked in part. So the Christmas that is celebrated isn't even Jesus actual birthday, it was set close to Yule/winter solstice that pagans celebrate. Same for Halloween and Easter and others.
North America is a melting pot where people are so different and changed from their original blood heritage or even the original belief systems. For example I have met those who qualify as having Native American blood but look nothing like those who have more native blood. They are very white white and have hair in many different shades and styles. Same thing as you are saying for Muslims.
YOu might try focusing your energy into the writing of a blog dedicated to educating people on what it is like to be an American Muslim. You may actually make some friends and connections that way. You expressed yourself well and I would love to see you take some of the points you made and expound on them.
Another thing to try is finding a group of people who love to celebrate the fact that they are all spiritual creatures with differing beliefs systems that are accepted by all in the group. I am part of such an online group, set up much like facebook but totally separate. It is called Spiritualnetworks.com Make sure the s in networks in there or you get a totally different site. It is a place you can begin to feel acceptance and hopefully you'll eventually find the accepting individuals or groups in real life, not just via the computer.
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Hi Hannah,
In my opinion, you've got the right of it. People shouldn't judge you by the stereotypes they see on TV. That said, they're going to. It's an unfortunate truth that it is easier for people to conform to society's stereotypes than to try to fight them. As an Arab and a Muslim (even though you don't necessarily look like either), you're going to be discriminated against for much of your life. But trust me, it gets better.
I'm guessing you're in high school. Once you become older, you might find that people are more willing to look past stereotypes. High school is a time of growing and learning, and some kids become overwhelmed by all the changes, so find it easier to be like everyone else and act like people on TV act. However, once people begin to grow up, they realize that their stereotypes are unfounded and unfair. As you age, I hope you'll find friends who will accept you for WHO you are, not what you are.
Lastly, you have to ask yourself this: if these people are discriminating against you and being cruel, do you really want them for friends? Even the other Muslims at your school may not be good people to be around. I know it's hard, and feels lonely a lot of the time. I would suggest trying to strengthen the relationships with the friends you do have. They obviously like you for you, and those are the people you want to have around you.
Hope this helps!
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