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In need of some advice! My crush is driving me crazy!?
Okay so im going to explain this the best that I can. So i have a neighbor who i have known since i was 9 and im now 17 on Thursday! :p okay so we were best friends and we kissed! So we have made up a couple of times and it just hasnt worked out too well. So just about a month ago he messaged me on Facebook out of no where (i like him so i was super excited) and he wanted to ride bikes like we used to do every night! So we rode bikes 3 different times and i thought all was going well and we were friends again and we were gonna work on this. But then out of no where he just started ignoring me. I didnt do anything at all.. And he had his keychain at my house and i found it and so i told him and he asked me if i could put it in him mailbox! Well when i got back inside i told him i put it in there. And he messaged me back and told me thanks and he couldnt ride bikes that night. So i told him to just message me when he could and its been 2 or 3 weeks and he still hasnt messaged me. So ive been going to his youth group that my friend who also goes there invited me to! And ive been 3 times and each time hes only spoken to me once! Hes either says hey or bye. Thats all and when we are alone together im like a complete stranger. I just dont understand whats going on..He was just talking to me a couple weeks ago and out of no where hes now ignoring me.. and i know i can say something but im very shy and just dont know what to say!! Im pretty dissapointed and very sad about this actually. Especially since i like him!! But idk if i should try to talk to him about this or just leave it alone and stuff. Its hard when i have to see him when he goes down the road and at youth group and bible study. So if anyone has any advice on this PLEASE help me im begging you!! Im tired of having to go through this everyday!
P.S. any suggestions on talking to him or what i should say to him! whether its me asking about what our friendship is or just regular talking if I should even talk to him at all!
Thanks, Candice.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
I don't he's returning the feelings. I think at one point he was interested, and then just lost interest.
He probably says hi and bye to you to be nice and try to make sure you know that he doesn't hate you or anything, but also not showing more interest than that so that you don't get the wrong idea.
I don't think you did anything wrong. He probably just wasn't feeling it and didn't know how to tell you or something. Which really sucks because it just ends up screwing with your head when you don't know where someone stands.
I think you should move on. I mean you can talk to him, if that will help you. You might have to prepare yourself for either him not having feelings for you or he's just not ready for a relationship. Then at that point, you know you should move on.
So do whatever you feel is right.
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First of all, you are going to want a guy that is really into you, not worrying about the ones that aren't. There's a lot of change going on in people between ages 8,9 10 and highschool, and then even more changes in maturity and what we like, between highschool and college.
The initial interest he had in you in the past, he may have wanted to see if it was still there. So he went bike riding for an excuse to be with you. Kts possible that he discovered that his feelings have changed, not due to anything you've done wrong. But possibly he doesnt feel the same and especially now when old enough for hormones to be able to determine a spark or romantic chemistry with someone, if he doesnt feel it, due to his age and inexperience, he has no idea how to treat you or what catagory you fit into.
He may be afraid of giving you false hopes for a romantic dating relationship that he doesnt want now so a guy will distance himself out of concern of not wanting to hurt a female, not knowing that the very act of distancing himself is hurtful.
First of all, you need to be okay with the fact that his feelings may have changed and not have any expectations, not even in just the friendship realm before he will feel comfortable to open up. So if you want to be on speaking terms with him, you may have to convince him that you have no expectations of him. That you were friends in the past but you understand that you both have changed and some of those changes may make your friendship different. So tell him he doesnt have to distance himself to keep from hurting you. Let him know that his distancing himself is actually making you feel worse, not helping. All you want is to be able to support him in whatever it is he wants. If he is finding himself attracted to another girl, you don't want to mess things up for him. If he likes you no longer romantically as he did in the past, you understand but need to know that from him and you wont hold it against him, he can still be friendly with you cus above all,you value his friendship. If you can say and really mean all that, then you have something you can say to him. Otherwise it will continue to be awkward between you two.
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