|
How can I stop lusting after my straight friend?
Im 14f and have known I was bi or gay all my life, and im comfortable with it.my best friend...ive had a crush on her for years.she knows I do, but it hurts sometimes, I really like her shes straight.im cool with our friendship.its amazing, but how can I stop you know...likeing her in that way so muxh? Cant get over it.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Work/School Relationships?
Separation.
Talk to her. Tell her that you need to get over the crush and you need a little time with no contact with her until you deal with it.
I'm a guy, I had a similar situation with a girl not too long ago. I was into her, she wasn't into me, but we were close friends. I had to step back for a little while in order to get my head straight. Not permanently, just maybe for a few weeks, maybe a couple of months.
Can be hard in school. When you're an adult you can just not have someone over and not go to their place and not call and you're golden. Just be gentle about it. Let her know that it's your problem and you just have to deal with it yourself, and that you'll be back as soon as you're emotionally able. Stress that nothing about the friendship has changed, it's just the crush that needs to die.
Be prepared on your end, if you're successful, that you find that you have less desire to spend time around her. When you're friends with someone you're attracted to, often that's part of why you get so close with them in the first place.
]
Hey, I'm bi too! I've been in your situation many times -- and I also had a crush on my straight best friend before but eventually got over it. Isn't it hard when you have a crush on a girl, but you can't be with her because she's straight?
I can tell that your friendship is important to you. That's one of the main reasons why you want to get over this crush. You want to be able to have a regular friendship where you feel the same way about each other, and you don't want things to be awkward between you two. I'm going to tell you what I do to get over my crushes on straight girls. These might be helpful for you, too.
First of all, it helps to spend time with other people and try new activities. Have fun hanging out and going places with your other friends -- it'll help take your mind off that one friend whom you have a crush on. Just make sure you do things that don't remind you of her, and pick things that both interest you and distract you from your best friend.
Make sure you also have boundaries. It's okay to hang out with her every once in a while, but try to reduce the amount of time spent hanging out with her. Putting space between you and your best friend will help you get over it.
It sometimes helps me to look around for a new love interest. But don't find someone who closely resembles your best friend, because you'll only compare the new person to your best friend. Look for someone who is rather different. If you look around, you'll also be able to find other girls who like girls.
Lastly, remember that love comes in many different forms. Maybe she doesn't like you the way you like her, but it doesn't mean she cares about you any less. A while later from now, you won't have a crush on her, but you will still love her. She will still be your best friend, and you will still be hers. You will look back and realize that your friendship is worth the effort it took to get over this crush.
Who knows, you might meet another very special girl -- this time, one who likes girls just like you do.
]
You stop liking someone the same way you stop liking anyone else. You need to let yourself move on because these feelings you have aren't going to get you anywhere and it could possibly ruin the friendship. So you should stop spending a lot of time around her, don't text or call her a lot. Just give yourself some time to get over her. If she's a good friend, she'll understand. It doesn't mean that you have to completely cut her out of your life, but you do need more space.
Most girls can't get over somebody because they say they can't. They think the person they like are perfect for them and that there is no one else for them. After the break up, most girls will move on in a few months. Some take years because they keep talking to that person and swear that they can't get over them, but it's because they won't let themselves.
So don't tell yourself that you can't get over her, or else you really won't and you'll be heartbroken.
]
Well, I would say that if you honestly really like her than I have no reason why you should stop. If it's a crush that has been going on for so long than I think that it will be very difficult to get over it. I honestly personally wouldn't mind if that happened to me; If it really bothers you liking her so much I suggest not spending time with that person but i honestly wouldn't do it. She might be very cool!
]
More Questions: |