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My paents say she is ugly
Hey , um i got into a relationship recently with this girl from Vienna , and both of us really love each other , so um my parents wanted to see her picture so i showed them one of her pictures , and they totally dislike her... Their telling me she looks ugly and they made me dislike her a bit.... and after 2 days we were talking again and she told me that she loves me and she wants to see me in Vienna , so what do i do , should i listen to what my parents say or be with her ?? ... thanks .
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Your parents are wrong. Love isn't about looks. That's extremely shallow. When you love someone, you love them for exactly how they are.
How can you be swayed so easily to grow to dislike someone just because they said she was ugly?
You probably shouldn't be with her until you learn what love is all about.
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I am gonna keep this simple: If you two love each other then there is nothing your parents can do about it. Who cares how she looks, as long as she id beautiful through your eyes. GOOD LUCK! :)
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There are many lessons in life, One is, Never judge a book by it's cover.
Love isn't about how someone looks. It's about who they are as a person, If they make you happy, If you make them happy. No marriage /relationship should be based on what others think.
Your parents are ignorant, They are 100% wrong. They are judging her based on what she looks like and not who she is as a person. Do not follow their footsteps, Many people may not be the most attractive but sometimes they are great people. Give everyone a chance and get to know them before turning them away.
A relationship is about YOU and THAT PERSON. Not your parents. Don't ever let someone tell you who you should and shouldn't be with. Listen to yourself and go with what you want
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Your parents are wrong. They have made a judgment based on looks alone. Beauty is only skin deep. The real person the person you have come to know and love is the person that lies beneath the skin. The person that lies beyond the sexual attraction males and females have for one another.
I'm not saying sexual attraction isn't important, it is though it does not have to be based on outer beauty. I have a line I use in giving advice along other lines in relationship building. It goes like this: "Sex will only take a relationship so far." "At some point you wake up one morning and find a need speak to one another and you find you have nothing in common."
This is the problem in basing a relationship solely on beauty and sexual attraction. From the little you have written I would say you have seen beyond this point and make your judgments based on other values. Good for you.
As should you listen to your parents? My advice would be no. Listen to your heart and mind. If this is the girl that make you happy and you make her happy then maybe this is the girl you should consider making a life with.
Your parents are being snobbish in away wanting a beauty queen for a daughter in-law. They should be carful what they ask for. Beauty queens can be high maintenance and you can be very unhappy. If your unhappy they will be unhappy too.
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She doesn't deserve you. If you can be so easily swayed but the opinions of others, then you are not ready for a committed relationship or marriage.
Hate to have to tell you stuff that shows you have growing up to do. But hey...all of us at some point needed to learn the same thing. I know I did, I had to grow a thick skin and not let the opinions of others have any effect on me. I think you can do it or you would've dismissed this situation in your mind and just ignored it.
So it's all about learning and growing up right now.
One thing I can say is that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
TV and movies and Hollywood makeup artists have most the world believing that there is such a thing as the flawless beauties we see in film or modeling but it is all fake. Look up celebrities without makeup, before and after pics. You will see what I mean.
Then there are skinny people who fall for chubby people and vice versa, people of one color skin who fall for someone of a different color, or a different social status, younger than or older than, the list goes on. We are unique in what attracts us about another person.
If you really loved the young women, and were sure of her love for you...a friend playing a prank could come along and tell you that they say her cheating on you and it would NEVER occur to you to believe what they say because you know better what your status is with her.
You may have liked her and but you are very young, at least in life experience. So what you think may have been love is likely not that at all.
Your parents have their own reasons I am sure for what they said. But their comments point out that they never grew up and matured either. We can't help who our parents are. But we sure as heck have a choice to decide to become just like them, or to make choices to become better than them. I am sorry to hear you have parents that just don't know any better.
Listen to your heart, to your inner voice and that gut feeling. You'll do far better following that than giving any power to what the parents say. You do have the option of rejecting what they say. If they ever decide to use threats against you...tell them that you love but that your life is yours and yours only to live, not a life for them to try to live through you. They have their own lives to live. Then move on and live your life with who ever you wish to date and someday marry. If the parents do not come around and disown you...it's sad but that is their choice. No one can Make another person do anything they don't want to. A person can cave in and give control of their life to another, but you can always take that control back.
So get a backbone young man.
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