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Should i give up after 5 years or keep going?
I need help with my crush. I have known her for 5 years and shes shy around me. I asked her out but she never replys. But she just ends up hating me even more. It just makes things awkward. Should i give up after 5 years or keep going.
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This is...scary.
If someone does not say yes, that's a no, and you need to move on. Like, the next day. Not 5 years later.
Following someone around for 5 years making things awkward is creepy. It's intrusive and uncomfortable.
And not just to her. You need to pay more attention to the things you let yourself do. Obsessing over one girl who never says yes for 5 years is incredibly unhealthy. You are obsessed.
I am not insulting you. I am calling this to your attention. You need to understand that what you've been doing is kinda fucked up, and you need to stop doing that to people. Not only do you make yourself into a negative aspect of a person you like's life, but I guarantee that in 5 years tons of people have seen you doing it.
That's alot of other girls you could have crushed on in the mean time and maybe if they hadn't watched you creeping this one girl out for five years they might have been more receptive than her.
Pay more attention to what people around you are thinking and feeling. I guarantee this girl has given you a ton of signs that say "go away" and given your 5 year persistence I'm sure she had no idea what to do to stop you short of some kind of confrontation.
That's what you need to understand. You took a girl you liked and made her uncomfortable to the point that the only thing that might have gotten you to back off was a pretty sizeable confrontation between the two of you. As persistent as you were in this, I would imagine she's known for years that you weren't going to go away.
You have to work harder to pay attention to people early. Figure out what they want. I can't really give you a good comparison that you can relate to for what it's like for a girl to be on the receiving end of this behavior, but you can at least trust me when I tell you that it's not fun to have someone chasing after you for years like this. Even if she wanted to be your friend she couldn't, because your friendship is probably conditional on being interested in her. The two are hopelessly intertwined on your side, and who knows if you've got anywhere near the maturity and self control to sort them out from each other and then only keep the friendship part.
What made you think that chasing after a girl for 5 years was normal? What was the thought process three years ago when it had already been 2 years and you still had no success? I cannot for the life of me understand how you let it go that far, even if you're a 13 year old talking about a friendship that started at 8. I still wonder what the hell you've been doing for a year, I think by 12 you should have been able to start figuring this out.
You're probably mid to late teens. You gotta pay more attention. Social interaction is complicated and takes effort. Put more effort into it.
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5 years?! Known her 5 years or had a crush for 5 years? Either way, that is a very long time. Before you give up, you should at least have one final push at it. And Im pretty sure she doesn't hate you.
Be bold and tell her exactly how you feel- charm her with sweet words etc. Be like one of those guys all the girls want in the movie when he confesses his feelings. Do that, and then ask her if she'll go out with you. Not on text, or facebook or anything- face to face. Be brave! >Just flirt with her, talk to her and be her friend first so that it isn't so awkward<.
Then if she says no with all your efforts- that is called closure. Tell her that this is the last time you'll ask (so make it good). If she says yes, you wont have regretted giving up. If she says no, its pretty clear that she is just not for you, and then yes, move on, find a prettier and nicer girl to date. Good luck
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So you ask her out, she doesn't reply? And then she hates you?
Yeah, you should probably move on. If she doesn't respond to you when you ask her out and then she ends up "hating you even more" then there is no point to keep trying to pursue her.
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Not sure I understand right, you ask her out and she doesnt reply to that question or do you try talking to her and get not a word out of her?
Since communication is an important part of a relationship, and mutual attraction is needed, if she doenst respond either way, it might be best to move on. You will do so when you are ready
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