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Placed 2nd Too Much
Well I have this "best friend"
I dont even no what she is really. we both have done so pretty fucked up stuff to one another, sutff that it acutlaly extremely interesting and fucked up beyond believe but that would take another paragraph to explain ( email me if you want the story, it is very unique) But all and all, I love her. latley tho, things have been the rockiest the ever have been. but i am still holding on. I dont even think I like her very much anymore, but I keep remeber our past and how good she was to me than, and I am hoping this is just a phase for her. I mean, she isnt mean to me at the moment, she just... lies around aloot. And her values are a bit fucked up. But with me, we are still best friends. Its just when we are in different places do I realize she may not be treating me right. Why i think this is a phase is because this all started when she started going out with this guy pete. ever since they have gone out, she like protiztizes him first and that sucks. So i am just trying to get people opinions what to do... should i keep around this girl who was amazinng to me before her bf , and although she still isnt BAD to me persay, she puts me 2nd...which is a super bad feeling. Idk. its just hard to place someone first in your life and than be placed second in theirs... but does that mean u take a break? or deal?
I left way to much out, so if you are turly interested in my story. shoot me an email. more than happy to share.
thanks!
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
She doesn't really sound like a good friend. I'd stop hanging around her and see what she does. Like the other answerers said; People change. If she truly misses you, start hanging around her again (And tell her that she keeps putting you second).
Good luck!
-Christina
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The natural ways of life are that a man or woman will eventually find a mate and if it is a healthy relationship with 2 mature people, then they will be the closest to each other. I don't think you'd like it much as a girlfriend, let alone a wife if your sweetie says, hi hon. hope you have plans for yourself, I'm off to go bowling with Mark and tomorrow by the way, I'll be at the races with Phil.
You would not go for that if he put his best friends first, and left you in 2nd place. If you can handle that, You're unique and one in a million. No one else would stand for that.
It's hard for you seeing your friends attention go elsewhere. Eventually your turn will come and you'll likely do the same, total focus on the boyfriend.
New relationships are more intense in the beginning, it's called new relationship energy or NRE, and this will settle into a more normal less intense state after some time has gone by and at that time, it's easier to begin to focus on old close friends and begin to spend some time with them again.
If you feel I've understood this wrong because you have more things you did not mention that are important to get the right advice, then let me know.
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People change, obviously. Right now, I don't believe that you need her as a friend.
When people get into relationships, their friends are usually put on the side. There are friends who try to keep their friends around though even if they are dating. But your friend doesn't seem interested in that so I'd just let it go.
Maybe eventually she'll realize that she pushed you away or just let you go. But for now, hang out with other friends and enjoy your life.
Be friendly with her, don't be mean and just move on.
People don't always stay the same. Their values, their friends, their attitude and their life changes. Just because they used to be a good friend to you, doesn't mean that they always will be.
You should pick good friends and stick with them.
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She doesn't sound like a friend period.
People change it's just apart of life, She changed, You changed. Once, Someone had told me you can't live on "what if" well, You also can't live on " what used to be" either.
You two USED to be friends. Quite frankly you value the "friendship" more then she does. In fact my dear, I would staet to realize you are holding onto nothing. May be time to move on and focus on what's more important in life.
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