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My first time with a girl ...and I'm a girl .... Lesbehonest People!
I am a female, 21 years old, and up until about a month ago I have never really viewed a woman in a sexual way. I love penis! Butttt I met a really beautiful lesbian who was also kind of masculine (long hair but dressed like a guy..jeans, tshirts, backwards hat) ..anyways, I dig it. She got me very curious. So I was like okay, maybe I am a little bicurious about certain females. I say certain females because I am not in any way attracted sexually to my girl friends or girls I associate with. Kinda just this one girl. We hung out again a couple of times a mutual friend's wedding and we kind of had to be more reserved because we were in public but we are starting to text more and more. I actually kind of think about her a lot, which is weird for me.
My first question is, have any other females experienced this and how should I approach it? She is digging me and makes that known but I am also kinda digging her back... am I just curious or would I be able to go through with hanging out with her alone?
She asked me to her hotel room the couple of nights that we were staying out of town for that wedding and I declined. I just was kinda nervous. One of those nights she stayed in my room really late and we spooned and made out but that was it.
Next question, what should I expect sexually? She knows that I haven't even hooked up with a girl like that but I am still nervous. I don't want to seem inexperienced because I am very experienced and like to try new things sexually. Should I go through with this? Since she is more the "butch" and I more the "lipstick" type lesbian, does that mean she is going to fulfill the duties of a man (i.e. eating me out and playing with my pussy, etc) because honestly i wouldn't know what to do if she wanted me to go down on her or finger her.... I just am not down with that.
ANY advice in this category would be awesome.
THanks!!!
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Uhh yeah you're going to have to play with her too if you two have sex. Even if she's got toys to really take on the masculine role here she's not a guy with a penis which can reach orgasm by fulfilling said masculine role.
Saying you don't want to go down on her or finger her is kind of like saying you want to have sex with a guy without ever actually letting him penetrate you. It doesn't really work.
I mean if you don't want to, don't. But don't jump into bed with a girl one on one intending to never touch her intimate places.
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As a bisexual women that is the hottest thing i have ever read. Sounds like your in trouble. Well before you
do it make sure your committed to it before you do it good luck
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At first I was going to give you a different answer then I read Razhie's answer to you and she is right. You need to communicate with her first. Communication in any relationship is very important if you are going to have a successful relationship and this is most important in a sexual relationship. Be it a Gay, Lesbian or straight type relationship. Your partner needs to know up front what your boundaries are as well as your likes and dislikes.
Right now I would say you are not a lesbian and that you may be bi-curious at best; at least with this one friend. It may be that she would be willing to accept your boundaries hoping to teach you to reciprocate with her in lesbian sex.
You won't know this until you talk to her. What you might say to her is that you are a girly-girl who likes boys but for some reason you are attracted to her in a sexual manner an have felt know that she has feeling for you in a sexual manner. You might be willing to explore these feeling with her if she is willing to accept you boundaries. Then layout for her what you are willing to do with her. I wouldn't be surprised if she accepted your boundaries.
As a guy we don't expect a girl to give us a BJ the first time we make out with them or to give us a hand-job. We on the other hand are willing to go as far as the girl will allow us. I sort of expect this will be the same with your girl friend,
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If you only want this encounter to be her, sexually servicing you, you need to be really fucking clear about that.
Because if you hook up with her, and then tell her that no, actually you think her lady bits are gross and you don't want to touch them or reciprocate any of the sexual favors you'd like her to perform on you - she's going to pissed off and she's going to be right to be. That would be selfish and insulting.
She might be totally into you not reciprocating. That might be fine - so long as its agreed upon beforehand - but waiting til the last second to someone that you totally into them pleasing you, but that you aren't down with pleasing them - that's being a jerk and a user.
So, if you want to go through with anything, first off TALK to her about what that anything is. One of the nicer things about queer relationships and sex is that it can give people more room for negotiations and discussions about what works for both people. Take advantage of that and don't try to see everything as 'who is playing the guy/girl.' That's not how things have to work, thank goodness.
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