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What's the reason for the problems with my formerly happy healthy child?
My daughter is 11 years old.She has been a healthy and happy kid.For about two days,i noticed the following things in her:
1)Sudden loss of appetite.
2)Mood swings.
3)I caught her crying at night.
4)She even cant sleep at night.
5)Act like being scared.
Please help me.Her cute jokes and laughs were gone.She looks very small like of her age.
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sometimes preteen girls get like that
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That happens to my brother once.here are your options:
1/ she got a bad flu
2/ she is under a lot of stress latly
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The best thing to do is talk to her. Tell her she can say anything and it won't upset you. Explain you have notice that she doesn't want to eat lately, her moods have changed, she acts scared, won't sleep and cries herself to sleep when she does.
The constant mood swings do have me concerned. She may not be bipolar or depressed but rapid cycle mood swings all the time plus the other symptoms and anxiety are consistent with people suffering from depression and or bipolar disorder.
If she's unable to answer what's happening tell her it's not a punishment but you want her to talk to a doctor about what's going on and that she can do so without you in the room so long as she follows the recommendations and treatment if any.
Abuse is possible as is intense bullying so you have to ask directly about that and rule it out. I doubt it's PMS but perhaps her moods and being upset could be the precursor to menarche as that's the only other thing I can think of and it's a real shot in the dark. I would just talk to her as she will likely reveal what is going on and you can then determine whether she needs some professional help especially if you think it won't just fade away.
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I agree with Braidens answers especially the on set of puberty would rank high on my list of possible causes. Being 11 years old is about the right age for children to start feeling the effects of puberty. For reasons I cannot explain our children are maturing earlier than ever before.
Then to add to the list of possible causes could be;
1. Being teased/bullied at school. This could bring on depression.
2. Depression: caused by problems at school and the early onset at school.
3. Drugs/Alcohol: You can't rule these out either. When my son was in middle school he told us that alcohol was more of a problem than drugs.
4. She has been abused. This is always a possibility. It can happen even in middle school. If this is the problem the she is embarrassed scared and most of all feels she is at fault rather than the victim she would truly be.
Other than puberty the four items I listed are the top four that I can think of that would turn a happy child into the child you have described overnight.
Try talking to her in a calm manner. Assure her you are not mad and she won't be punished. That you want to help her, even with drugs or alcohol.
If your daughter will not talk to you about what is bothering her. Then I suggest the following. First make an appointment with your family doctor or her pediatrician for a complete physical to rule out any medical cause. Then find her a therapist she will be comfortable having as a confidant that she can talk to. The therapist will help her deal with any problem she may be attempting to deal with.
Understand the therapist cannot tell you exactly what the therapist and your daughter discuss in therapy. What the therapist can do is tell you what you need to do to help your daughter. There Is one exception. IF the problem involves abuse at school; the therapist will convince your daughter to allow you to be told of the abuse and then with the therapist a plan top deal with it will be developed.
My best bet is that your daughter is entering puberty. My niece was somewhat like your daughter upon entering puberty. Those first years were a royal pain though we all got through it. Just cover all the bases in the best interest of your daughter.
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This is something that should be discussed with a family doctor or a therapist. It sounds like possible depression or emotional issues. Have you tried talking to her? There is not much we can say as we are not doctors but something may of happened or it could very well be the beginning of puberty.
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