|
desicion on staying with someone or not: they have cheated on me multiple times with multiple people
What do you do when you're in love with someone so much that you you don't ever want to loose them. When you know they can be happier with someone else but they choose you. But when they choose you they choose you with tears in thier eyes. Because they know they could of been happier with someone else but they still choose you. And then you feel as of the whole world has fallen on top of you. Because he chose you with tears in his eyes and not joy. But that person tells you they love you. and you feel as if it's true. That person tells you they will change even tho they have told you that since the beggining. Even tho you've been together for over a year. But yet you still belive them. Even tho they been cheating on you since the start, more then once with multiple different people. Where they got to the point of even having sex. But you still see threw all those flaws and mistakes because you love them. What do you do, when they've hurt you so much even tho you don't deserve it, because you've been faithful to them since the start, because you know you've tried your hardest.. What do you do? Do you let them go to be with someone else.. or do you belive they will change and hopefully start fresh? :'( please help... I'm 17 years old female
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
If you were older and married for years with this man, then trying to works things out could be an option. But you're still really young. You do love him but you deserve so much better. If he keeps saying he'll change and he doesn't. Why believe him again? Break it off with him and now it's your turn to start fresh. You will find someone else who can make you ten times happier and won't cheat on you. You'll also find someone who will be really happy with you.
It will be really hard to move on, but this is definitely the time to do it.
]
He's not going to change. Your his safety net. Your the one he can come back to who will be there waiting for him when he has no one else to satisfy his needs.
Is this what you see yourself as, a vessel for his spending of his urges when there is no other. I Believe you have more dignity that that. If he loved you, he would love only you and sleep only in your bed by your side. That is what true love is. He will not change as long as you are there for him.
My advise is simple. You need to decide if you wish to be a vessel or if you wish to honored and cherished the way a women should be. If you pick the latter, which I hope you do. Then tell this guy to find someone else willing to be his safety vessel and to take a hike. That your going to find someone who will truly love you and respect you. Someone you can build a life and family with.
As my mother always told me. "There are many fish in the sea and the perfect fish is out there for you." Throw this one back he doesn't deserve you.
]
Sometimes in life , you need to make certain sacrifices for your own happiness that you deserve . Open your eyes wide and reminisce on what has taken place in your relationship . You've been together with him for over a year , and i could tell that you've been crying at the same time too . I'm not trying to humiliate your boyfriend or whatsoever but it's pointless to be with him . I advise you to let him be with someone else .
You've been loyal to him but he's taking you for granted and you gave him numerous chances to change . Did he try to strengthen the relationship ? No . Did he change ? Negative . Also , when it comes to love , both partners need to commit to it . If one of them acts as if he couldn't care less and doesn't appreciate his partner any longer , then his girlfriend needs to put on her goodbye shoes quick .
You see , what i meant by making sacrifices for yourself is leaving him for your own sunrise . Your own rainbow which you've not seen in ages and you deserve it . You've been in the storm for too long , don't you want to be happy again ? Let him go . It might hurt your heart at first , but you'll never regret it . One day , you'll meet the perfect man who'll be loyal to you , just like you . It's just a matter of time but believe me , you will meet the one . Even if you hope that he'll change , it will be useless if he still doesn't .
Have the courage to break the bond with him because you possess the right to not be taken granted anymore . At times like these , the one and only rule is this - be very , very gentle with yourself . It's going to be difficult to get through this period , but you'll make it and don't be bittered too much because of him . He envenomed the relationship . You can be sad , but allow yourself to hope . You can mourn , but allow yourself to laugh .
]
Once a cheater, Always a cheater. If you take him back you are allowing them to use you and telling them its okay when its not. You need to move on and withdraw yourself from him. As long as you remain in contact you are making it much harder then it has to be. There is NO excuse for cheating. Also, he has done it multiple times which makes it even worse. Do not show him your vulnerable, stand up on your own two feet and walk away. He blew his chances and you should know it by now. Be stronger then that
As long as you show him you are weak then he is going to take advantage of that and taking him back is weak. He cheated, he knew it was wrong and kept doing it. Was he thinking about you then? No. So exactly why are you taking his feelings into consideration? No way, Run for the hills and don't look back.
]
More Questions: |