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Friends believe a lie and now they don't like me.
I am an 18 year old female. One night, my friends ( Lucy and Karen) and I were getting ready to go out to a party, we had to take shifts because the car we were going in could only hold 5 people and there was 11 of us going. When we finally all got to the party, we all were hanging out and talking. Before the party, I was telling my friends that I never drink to get drunk because I don't like waking up the next day and not remembering what happened the night before. I am a social drinker, I guess you could say. Well, during the party while my friends were drinking more than me, they were off talking to boys and such, I was sitting on the kitchen table talking to Karen's best friend who is a boy that she has a crush on. I could still to this day, two weeks later, recite everything we talked about. We talked about Karen and if he has feelings for her and if he would ever want to be with her. I, then, talked to my guy friend about my previous conversation about Karen to her crush. The music was loud and the appartment was full so as we were talking, my head was on his shoulder so that I could talk in his ear that he'd hear me and he did the same thing when he talked to me. After the party, I left with this kid named Will. He said he would walk me back to my dorm after we walked into town so that he could get cigarettes. So, the whole walk he was calling my Karen and Lucy to see where they were (mind you, Will was drunk) and was getting very angry when they weren't answering their phones, calling them fucking bitches for not picking up and stupid for not leaving with him. Well, as we were walking into the parking lot of the gas station, we found Lucy. She ran up to Will and he hugged her and everything. He went in to get his cigarettes. I stayed outside. When they came out, we walked back to campus. They decided to go one way and check on Karen who was at her dorm with her crush. I was pissed that they just left me so I texted Lucy and told her that I was pissed and that I feel like I don't belong in their little friendship because a friend wouldn't leave me alone on a college campus to walk to my dorm by myself at 2 am. She texted me back freaking out that she is so done with this petty bullshit and that she heard what I said about her and that she is so done being my friend, she did like me but now she doesn't. I know for a fact that I said NOTHING bad about her. Like I said, I don't drink to get drunk so I would not forget that I "talked shit on her" if I didn't even drink to be drunk. The next morning, I texted Karen, she replied with a snarky comment. I asked what was wrong and she said the same thing: that she heard what I said about her. Again, I talked to two people about her; her crush and my friend and both of those conversations were good, how I think they deserve to be with each other to be happy and how they're so adorable together. I know, again, for a fact that I did not talk shit or Karen nor Lucy. I also know, after thinking about it, that Will was the one that told them I was saying bad things about him because he was the last person they talked to. It's funny.. he was talking shit on them calling them fucking bitches and stupid, yet they're still friends with him.
Two weeks later, I am moving on from being friends with them. If they don't believe me then why should I keep trying to convince them that I didn't say anything bad, ya know? Anyways, I was having dinner the other night in the dining hall with my roommate, ten minutes after I sat down, Karen and Lucy and Will and his friend were leaving the dining hall and they all gave me the rudest looks as they were leaving. It's enough to be mad at me for something I didn't do but to give me snarky looks and such crosses the line for me. Like, I'm trying to get over it.. why aren't they?
The whole gist of this is, how do I make myself not care about them anymore? When they give me rude looks, how do I just forget about it and brush it off my shoulders? I just want this whole thing to be over. If they don't want to friends over something stupid, whatever but get on with your life and stop being so rude to be.
I'm sorry this is so long and confusing but any help will do.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
You shouldn't worry about what they think. I am a girl
and I have had a lot of mishaps with my friends and I said to myself " if they were really my friend they would apologize and said they mistook what I said." So you shouldn't even talk to them if they hurt you that bad. Just shrug it off and move on with your live. You have your whole life of worry ahead of you and this is just a baby problem. Hope this was any help. Good luck ;) :)
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If they want to believe it, let them it isn't your problem. If they were your friends they would have cared enough to try to find out or work it out. Simply tell them what really happened, if you can. But after you're done tell them you just told them to clear the air, and that you do not want to resume a friendship.
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Friendships change all the time in college. Especially in your first year of college. People will form their own opinions about you and not sway from them. I suggest you just forget about them you know your concise is clear and that is all you need to know.
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Friendships in high school and college change quickly. You live in a dorm and attend school. You should be able to find new friends pretty easily. Join a club or sport team. You'll make new ones and won't care anymore.
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