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im gay but how do i tell mom
Im gay but I don't know how to tell her.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
I don't know your exact situation, but generally parents are much more aware of their kids situations than we give them credit for. She probably already has some idea that you are gay, but often parents are reluctant to bring the subject up for fear of not knowing what to say. So, you see, they are in the same boat as you. They are fearful of your reaction, they are not experts on the subject, and so they don't want to bring it up. Having said all that, you may want to start by having conversations with your mother and bring up the gay issue. Not about you, specifically, but just bring up the general subject. Perhaps you could talk about a friend who is struggling with the issue to see how your Mom reacts. If it appears she is handling the subject okay, then you can keep having those talks with your mother, each time moving closer to your own situation.
However, if your mother completely freaks out on the subject, then I caution you to be careful revealing yourself. As I said, I don't know your situation, but if you are still living at home, you must think about yourself, first. If there is any chance you may be thrown out of the house, then let it go. You have many years ahead of you and after you have a place of your own and are more independent, then you can tell your mother you are gay. Just know that there are millions of us other gay men and women out there who support you and want you to live the best life you can. Good luck.
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you shouldn't tell her shd will feel bad
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I disagree with the previous two people. If you feel you should tell your mom, you should tell her. I recently came out to my mom about being pansexual, so I've probably gone through something similar. Doesn't matter how old you are or how you've come to this realization. What matters is you feel this way and you want to be honest with your mother. I'll tell you how I did it.
First, I tried to thoroughly explain my theory on sexuality. I explained that gender is so fluid and there's so much gradation that it doesn't make sense to base attraction of someone on gender first. That's how I felt about it anyway.
That didn't take. She didn't understand that I was trying to tell her that I was attracted to men as well as women. But I wanted to be perfectly honest with her. So I eventually just blatantly told her, "Hey, Mom. What would you do if I dated a guy?" She said she didn't know and asked why I would ask. I followed with, "Because I wouldn't be opposed to it."
This was followed by a series of questions, but it turned out well. If I were you, I would be as blunt and clear as possible, making sure she knows where you're coming from. Hopefully things turn out ok. My mom is the religious, slightly homophobic type and my situation turned out ok. Best of luck.
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I agree with the previous guy.
1. How do you figure you are gay.
2. What makes you think you have to "find a way to tell your mom", is she like a religious fanatic that thinks being gay means you will go to hell?
3. What makes you think you have to "tell your mom", why can't you just be gay?
We need specifics to better answer your question.
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To give you a helpful answer I would need more information. Information as to your age and what has brought you to the conclusion you are gay.
There is nothing wrong with being gay. But if you are a young teenager and have had one gay sexual relation;this does not mean you are gay. Teenagers are suppose to explore their sexuality. Part of the exploration for some teenagers is having [a] gay relationship(s). This one or two or a relationship with just one person does not always define your sexual make up.
If you like you can private message me with more information and I will try to answer any questions you have.
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