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Does this happen to you?
Hey everyone! I'm 14/f
Recently I've been confronted with a common -- more common than I thought -- situation & it seems that whenever something new is presented to me, whether it be a new word or a new show I've never heard of, I start to see it everywhere. That is really no surprise because it happens each time I'm presented with something new.
This time the situation is knowing a person from the opposite sex for a long time & ending up married when you're older. I have always wondered why that is ever since I was little & had my forever crush on a friend.
There are a few songs that I already knew for a few years, others that I just learned, but have been hearing them a lot lately. Like:
Mary's Song (Oh My My My) - Taylor Swift
Should've kissed you - Chris Brown
Speak Now - Taylor Swift
Sparks fly - Taylor Swift
Back to December - Taylor Swift
Ours - Taylor Swift
Goodbye - Kesha
And then aside from the songs, I have seen a bunch of couples kissing everywhere I go, holding hands, kissing, flirting, laughing, happy people. I'm just stuck in the corner all sad because I'm too much of a wimp to tell "him" how I feel. It's like i'm bring tormented by my own thoughts! It's driving me crazy & I don't like it at all! I dream about it and everything!
I would just like to know, is it normal for this to happen to people? Thanks for reading.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Confirmation Bias.
The human brain is awesome. Totally and completely awesome.
One of the awesome things it does is look for patterns in shit that happens... Only, it has a bad habit of only really looking for the patterns it most wants or expects to find.
It's not reasonable or logical, but it does happen, and particular kind of sense-making behavoir your brain is doing right now, could just be called 'coincidence', but let's get a bit more scientific-y and call it confirmation bias.
Confirmation Bias is a tendency of people to favor information that confirms their beliefs or theories. We don't notice or remember everything we encounter in a day. We remember and notice information selectively and the effect is stronger for emotionally charged issues (like a very long-term crush) and for deeply entrenched beliefs (like, say, a belief in finding one true love).
You have a theory that you destined to marry your long-time crush. You are probably deeply invested in this emotionally, and have been for a while, even if your rational mind tells you it's just a fantasy. It's the perfect case for your mind to apply some serious confirmation bias.
You can read a bit more about the phenomenon on the much-beloved Wikipedia here:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
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I like voice of reasons' answer too.
If I was a psychologist I would probably say you see and here these things as you do because they are more prevalent in your subconscious than you are aware of.
I recently bought a new car. It is a Jeep Grand Cherokee. Before I purchased the car I don't remember ever seeing that many on the road before. Now that I own one I see them everywhere. I'm more conscious of them because they mean something to me even though I am not consciously thinking of them.
There is nothing wrong with this. You are being more aware of your surroundings. You are growing up. All of this is normal. As you get older and when you reach my age, which is really old. Old songs will have new meaning. They will bring back old memories.
I listen to satellite radio 60's & 70's music. Many of the songs played bring back many different memories, all of them good ones as we tend to forget the bad ones. This is all normal. Relax and have fun with it.
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Sorry if my answer sounds insipid, but life is like that sometimes. It's one of the things that makes it such a trip.
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Hi!
You pretty much answered your own question with "It's like i'm (being) tormented by my own thoughts!"
When we have something on our minds, it seems to keep hitting us in the face. For example, I'm hungry, and all of a sudden, something so simple looks just so amazing to eat! Or I just heard a new song, and now It feels as if I'm hearing it everywhere, but I'm only just paying attention to it now, when I didn't earlier on!
So really, it's just you noticing things because of thought - things you wouldn't have noticed before, and it's perfectly normal.
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