When i was 16 year old he kissed me first time and after that slowly we moved to complete sex. After 1 year relation i got pregnant at the age of 17. After completing 3 months we came to know that i am pregnant. We got scared and we abort that child. Our relation was not stopped there it lasts for 8 years. When i had completed my graduation my father gets seriously ill and admitted in the hospital. At the same time he met another girl and married her. I was feeling to made suicide at that time but i thought about my family as i am the elder sister and i have 2 younger sisters and 1 younger brother. After 3 years my father had expired and i decided to settle down my sister and brother and then to die. But each day i am suffering from a pain like hell. My 2nd number sister got married and got 1 cute baby but still another sister is got to marry and brother is still studying. I don't have patience to live more. I really want to die. Few months ago, I had told about my relation with that boy to his or my family. His wife and mother insulted me a lot. I am still meeting that boy as we both cant live without each other. But he is not accepting this in front of every one. He is not ready to leave his wife as he has got one girl child from her and he don't want to do injustice with that baby. But, what should i do? I tried to think about another boy to marry but it's not possible for me. I think to quit this life is the best solution in this situation.
Now on the the more pressing things. I do not think suicide is the answer. I think you need to refocus your energies. Energy can be a powerful thing. You need to take some time for yourself, and cleanse your energy. The energy around you right now is very dark, sweetheart, and that needs to be lightened. To cleanse your energy, you must cleanse your body. This can be through hot water (baths, jacuzzis, have a nice soak), acupuncture, massage (deep tissue), and possibly even seeking therapy if you are suicidal. I'd just like to note that seeking therapy doesn't make you crazy, it means that you are taking charge of your own healing. Any of those things will work.
As for the boy, well, he is married and is staying in his marriage because of his daughter. You have no way of knowing how long he will stick it out for her. He is obviously trying to be a good father. He wants to make sure that as his child grows up, she has a father. I think it is admirable, although he is seeing you on the side. I do think you should let him go. He should not be seeing anyone else if he is still married, and you don't need the extra worry of when is he coming back to you.
Jasmine23 answered Wednesday August 8 2012, 6:11 pm: You need to move on honey. This boy is getting his cake and eating to. You will not be able to find someone until you get rid of this boy... you say he is not ready to leave his wife and child... what makes you think he will ever leave them. You need to let go of the past. Once you do that you will be alot happier. This boy may have meant alot to you in the past but. If you don't let him go. And keep him around you won't be happy. And I garentee you will find someone a million times better!!! You may not believe it now but its true!
*Jasmine;; [ Jasmine23's advice column | Ask Jasmine23 A Question ]
AngelsColumn answered Wednesday August 8 2012, 6:07 pm: Just because a boy screwed you over when you needed him at the most saddest part of your life don't mean you should let him empower you to suicide. Like you said you have family to think about. Your the oldest. That is going to be hard, but you have to live through the pain to fight it. By this i mean guys are jerks. There going to screw you over one point in your life, but you have to think of it this way. That was one boy and are you going to let him get the best of you? You have to be tough and show him that he lost something GREAT!! Then he's going to regret cheating & he's going to feel like the dumb ass at the end. The whole point of these break-ups is to make sure the other person don't push you down. You have to stay strong in the break-ups so he can know your stronger wiser and much better without him that your a SURVIVOR.
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