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guy couldnt afford to buy me a drink
i went on a date with a really cute and older guy.
we got drinks- the first one he paid for and the second he culdnt afford and had to awkwardly ask me to pay for it myself.
he didnt mean anything by it it was a honest he couldnt afford to buy mea drink! hes a waiter and doesnt have a lot of money at moment, so its understandable- however i am still turned off.
OTHER than that we had an AWSOME time but i cant get over how he couldnt afford to pay for my 8$ drink.
i told him it was werid and he owes me.
am i weird for thinking this is such a red flag? i really like him but im insulted by how he asked me to pay!
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This is a very odd situation. He should have told you beforehand he could only pay for one drink. Irresponsibility is unattractive.
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You're insulted?
If he can't afford it, he can't afford it.
If a guy buys YOU a drink, does he tell you it's weird and you owe him?
I doubt it.
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That's strange, but money is tight nowadays. He probably didn't think he'd run out of money like that and he's probably extremely embarrassed and hurt. Men like to feel they can provide and when it comes to the chance that they can't, they feel emasculated. It doesn't help that you're insulted by it.
You shouldn't be insulted by it. He's probably more upset over it than you are. Besides, it was just a drink. Give him another chance. Don't make money a big thing in your relationship, otherwise, it'll probably fail.
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You're insulted? I am insulted that you are sabotaging the progress of your own gender.
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I guess it would be a bit of a turn off. But it wouldn't stop me from going out with him again. If he does it again, then that's a problem.
Maybe he'll learn from this one and figure out how much money he has before he buys you more drinks.
Don't be really insulted by that, it could have been just an honest mistake. Go out with him again and see how that goes. You don't want to miss out on a great guy over something like this.
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I don't mean to be rude but you both are over doing it. Okay he could not buy you a 8$ drink. Is this the first time? If so you should leave it be. Now if he does this again THEN that when you should start talking. And a 3 time. Stated looking for some one else. But for a first time he did that I think you are over doing it. Only because he's a waiter I'm a saying that. If he had a better paying job then I would be saying you tell him off girl!And if you most say something let it be something like: I like men who plain there money. I did not like what you did with your money the last time. I hope you plain better this time because I did not come with plains to pay. For ANYTHING!
Waiter do not get much. Most of then only get payed what there tip. Some might get 10$ a week or something like that. So when you said you under stand I don't think you did. I'm not saying you don't have the right to be turn off(a little)I'm just saying..if this is the first time this is not a "red flag" .
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Yeah, I would probably bring it up in a polite way.
The biggest issues here is how he didn't budget his money before he took you out on a date. It's almost like taking someone out to dinner and not having enough to pay for it, If you can't afford to dine out then you simply don't don't dine out in the first place. If I were in your shoes, I'd be offended. Yes, I'd probably also be a bit turned off as well.
Maybe it was an honest mistake but I fail to see how someone can "forget" that they don't have enough to take someone out. I suppose whether to keep dating him would depend on the guy, How much fun you really had with him and if it was really a n honest mistake. Either way, I'd bring it up politely but if happens again then it would be the end of it.
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