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omg im 12 and i had sex help!
12/F Ok well I've asked a question about this before about me not wanting to have sex with my boyfriend and well I kinda took the advise until a few weeks ago:(it was his birthday and we were at his house in his bedroom and then we were playing truth or dare I got dared to have sex with him...infront of everyone!so well I said no at first but then everyone got mad so I said yes and well we did! And now I have missed my period and I'm gettin symptoms of pregnancy and I don't know what to do! Help please! I hate myself for doing it!I feel like such a slut!
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see your gp and if u dont want to have the baby then get an abortion but also make sure u take a pregnancy test first so you know that you're definitely pregnant dont tell your family though they may dislike the fact that you had sex at the age of 12 and also tell your boyfriend but no one else.
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Don't hate yourself. you are not a slut. you are strong and confident and you can get through this. Mistakes only teach you lessons and make you a stronger and better person because of it. be honest. talk to your doctor right away and tell a trusted adult. don't let a mistake made in the past define you as a person in the future. from now on, just promise yourself you will be responsible and don't have sex again until you're in your 20s. because you have so much to live for!!!! start fresh. turn the next page of your life. everything is going to be OK. if your boyfriend and/or your friends were forcing you in to something you didn't want to do, they don't really care about you. they should care enough to talk you out of having sex at 12, because it is putting yourself at risk and force you to grow up way too fast. if your friend or boyfriend felt it was ok to make you feel bad about yourself, unhappy, and grow up too fast, they were selfish. don't blame yourself for that. you are strong and can get through this if you reach out to your trusted friends and family.
go out there. feel the warm sunshine on your face. be brave. be strong. live the wonderful life you have ahead of you and leave the past behind you by reaching out to the people who really care about you.
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Just try and relax. You are not a slut, but you do need to pick better friends. For them to peer pressure you is not cool. You shouldn't feel like you have to have sex, especially at your age. I highly recommend you wait at least a few years before even thinking about having sex again. But, to each there own. Definitely go to a doctor ASAP, if you go to plan parenthood, they won't contact your parents. Just, think twice about the people you hang out with, including your boyfriend. Good luck sweetie, hope I helped!
-Bri
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Hey, I would take the advice that others have written here for the possible pregnancy part, but I just want you to know that you are not a slut. Sluts are girls who offer themselves up for sex, who dress really revealingly because they want guys to hook up with them. You are someone who was pressured into having sex, you weren't out there trying to get it. You aren't a slut and feeling down on yourself will only make things worse. You realize your mistake and that's what counts. But yeah, your friends sound pretty bad for pressuring you to do something like that. I'm sorry about the whole situation, I hope everything works out okay!!!
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Right firstly dont panic,
you are showing symptoms of pregnency but panicing will not help you out, if your boyfriend and your friends made you do this there not worth having as friends and your boyfriend should no that making people have sex with you that didnt want it is against the law, he could go to jail for that! But the most important thing to do is tell an adult, they might tell you off but thats only out of guilt that this has happened you can go to a chemists and buy these things that you can use to tell you for sure if your pregnent, and you are not a slut! Its your friends and boyfriends fault for making you do such a thing when your not ready for it!
Hope this helped! i hope you'll be okay x
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If everything happened as you said it did you have been raped. The definition of rape is having sex against your will. You said no. You were then bullied, coerced or in some way forced to change your mind. That is the definition of rape. That in a manner of speaking is sort of good news for if you are pregnant you will need to tell your parents.
Let me make one thing perfectly clear. Once anyone says no, boy or girl, to having sex. If they are in anyway forced, shamed, bullied or pressured into having sex; that is the definition of rape. By your description of what happened, even though you consented in the end; you were raped. You felt you had no choice. Having no choice is rape. You are a victim. Not a willing participant. Just keep remembering that.
Know what you have to do is tell your parents. You start by telling them you were raped and you think you are pregnant. From that point on your parents are going to ask a lot of questions. They are going to want to know why you didn't tell them sooner. The answer to that question is simple you were not sure you were raped until someone told you the definition of rape. Then tell them just as you have written to us. Like I said once you said NO, anything further becomes subject to the Rape laws and the police should be called.
Then you need to see a doctor to find out if you are pregnant. If you are then being under 14 whatever your parents decide is what you must do.
Just keep in mind that by definition you were raped. Your parents are going to be upset. There may be some crying and yelling but I don't think they will be mad at you. I think the may be upset with themselves that you were afraid to tell them what happened to you.
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It is truly a shame that you decided to not fully take the advice. I am also very sorry that you caved into peer pressure and allowed such a thing to happen, especially in front of others, because making love to someone shouldn't be shared (unless it's ones fetish) with others. But now the thing you should do is remain calm. There are such things as phantom pregnancies, (Phantom Pregnancy, also known as psuedopregnancy : the occurrence of signs of pregnancy, such as enlarged abdomen and absence of menstruation, when no embryo is present). If you believe to be pregnant, it is entirely possible that you may show these signs.
The best way to know whether or not you are pregnant is to undergo a pregnancy test. First, go to your local dollar store, they have pregnancy tests for 1 dollar, and are quite accurate. I've bought mine from there and I've never had an incorrect reading, and buy several of them. Best bet would be to buy at least 3. This way you can properly monitor yourself. Such as taking 1 pregnancy test, once a week. And if you are still worried, you may have to speak with one of your parents about going to planned parenthood for a blood test to check your system for the hormone HGC, which is present in pregnancy, as well as an ultrasound. If it should prove that you are pregnant, then you and your parents will have to decide on what to do. Especially since you are so young. But I believe if you believe you are grown up enough to get intimate with someone, you are also grown up enough to deal with the consequences of your decisions.
Replying - I can understand why you would be afraid of telling your parents. It's no laughing joke. In the end you'll just have to get new friends, because real friends wouldn't make you do something you do NOT want to do. If you do turn out to be pregnant, I'm afraid you will have no choice but to tell your parents what happened, though in the end, it is probably best that you do whether or not you were pregnant. You don't want to end up hating yourself, and later spiraling into depression, as sometimes the end result of that is far worse. You could have gotten up and left whether they said they would never talk to you again, but I'm assuming that due to your fear, you did not, and you did what you did not wish to do. Which in essence is rape. What's even worse, your so called "friends" were accomplices in this as well. If it turns out you are not pregnant, and that's fine, but they try to do it again? Telling you to do something you don't want to do, or else they won't talk to you anymore.. That is not a life to live. You are too young to be destroying yourself physically and emotionally, especially with all the beautiful things still has yet to offer you. I've given you my advice, but it is up to you whether or not to take it or not. I'd just hate to see another girl go off degrading herself just to keep her "friends" happy. Do what makes you happy and safe.
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