|
Breaking Up with long term serious/clingy girlfriend
So here's the deal, I started going out with my girlfriend of 1 1/2 years my freshman year of college, before I had really experienced much of the classic college life. I care about my girlfriend and I want her to be happy but she pretty much dominates my entire social life. Pretty much whenever I'm not in class or studying I'm with her. We get into really stressful fights fairly frequently and sometimes I feel like I may die at the early age of 45 because of this stress. Another thing is that I had a lot of plans for myself post-college. Like, I was going to go teach English abroad in Japan for a year or two before I settled down to getting a real job. It looks like I wont be able to do any of that stuff because I've got my girlfriend holding me back.
Basically what I'm asking here is, would I be wrong for breaking up with her, even though I know it will completely devastate her? I'm only 19 and she already is expecting me to commit to her for life. Am I an asshole for wanting to move on?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Yeah dude, get out of there! She sounds like an okay person, but you're only 19- you got your whole life ahead of you! I'm guessing this is, what, your 6th serious girlfriend (sorry if I'm wrong)? You got a lot ahead of you- sure she may hate you, but if she's taking up your time, she being selfish already. Your time is precious, don't waste it with someone who is tying you down.
P.S. If you break up with her, don't use any clichés. She will punch you.
P.P.S. You're not an asshole, just make sure you don't see anything serious with her before you break up with her. Maybe you two are in love and you don't realize it. Maybe if you look beyond your dreams of teaching English in Japan, you may see that you love her SO much. Maybe she's going through a phase and will get nicer, and might even want to go to Japan with you! I don't know. Do what's best for you. You're the one that you're going to be living with for the rest of your life, and you know you best.
]
Dude
You need to do what is best for YOU not what is best for her. The number one thing in life when you are in a relationship you gotta put yourself first. If the girl is controlling you to the point where you are stalling on your goals in life then you need move on. College life is stressful as hell and when you are trying to juggle time between school and relationships it's just going to beat you to the core. You are not an asshole, You are a guy that needs to do what he needs to do in life. Never let someone hold you back from achieving your goals. You are young, You have many opportunities ahead of you and as much as it may bother to hear this girl isn't the only girl in the sea. You've got some pretty awesome goals set for yourself and I recommend you go and achieve them now while you are young and still can. Being stressed and held back can only cause you nothing but regrets man. If it's meant to work out it will but in the meantime do what you need to do because if you stall for a chick then somewhere down the line your be sitting on it.
]
You're sweet to think of her feelings however you have so much to do with your life - if you commit to her now and miss all those opportunities, you will just end up resenting her for holding you back. She is young enough to find someone else. She will be hurt in the short term but it is best for both of you to go your separate ways. Good luck.
]
If I were in this place I would down right brake up with her. If you don't want her doing this and not to be with her every second and having to then her invading and not letting you do what you want to dump her! You still have a few years to wait to get married enjoy them. She's holding you back and most guys in this situation would dump her. So dump her and if she asks why tell her cause every girl deserves to know why. Do what's right.
Good luck
]
More Questions: |