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how do i tell a guy i want to be his girlfriend?


Question Posted Saturday November 19 2011, 9:13 am

ok, me and this guy have been talking for about a month and we have kissed a couple of times. He sometimes calls me and we talk a lot on facebook. One day i told him that i liked him but he said he is not ready to be in a relationship because of the things that he sees happening to people, and he doesnt knw when he will be ready. I want to convince him and re-assure him that i will make him happy and i would never hurt him or anythng like that.
Im 17 and he is 21.


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TimothyDanger answered Tuesday April 3 2012, 12:47 pm:
The things he sees happening to people is probably going to jail. In most states, a 21 year old and 17 year old involved in a relationship is usually a jail sentence if they decide to *ahem* consummate the relationship. I know that's not the answer you're looking for, but I couldn't answer your question without pointing that out.
In all actuality, you can't force someone to "be ready" he either is or isn't. If I were you, I'd be glad he is at least honest on what he says, a lot of people wouldn't be and just use you physically. Maybe he just likes someone to talk to. Or... he could be stringing you along. In which case, it's only up to you if you want to keep talking to him. Don't feel bad about feeling duped. Everyone has been strung along at some point. I saw it on "How I met Your Mother" so I know it's a fact

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VoiceofReason answered Wednesday November 23 2011, 5:26 am:
Actually, the guy is right. Both of you should be in the exploratory phase of life and not be in such a hurry to get tied down. Your brain will keep developing until age 25, so your sensibilities are still evolving, as are his. So date around, get some life experience under your belt and then somewhere down the line you will have a much better fix on specifically what you want out of a mate.

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AskAliceMadisson answered Monday November 21 2011, 2:39 am:
You have to give him time. You can't convince someone to be your boyfriend.
He will know that you love him over time, and he will start yo know you won't hurt him.
Remember don't wait on him. If he love you he will ask you out.
But if you wait you will become more upset and other guys won't like you anymore.
You are almost the same as this one case I had. She has the same problem.
And she kept on waiting and now she is sad.
Don't wait, let time take you where you have to be.

-Ask Alice

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Jasmine23 answered Monday November 21 2011, 2:09 am:
You can't convince anyone to be happy with you or make them feel that they are ready for a relationship. They have to do it on their own. Feelings aren't pushed they are formed. Give him some time and space. if he starts to have feelings foryou well awesome!! but if not then you will know it wasn't meant to be.

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nascarfan1987 answered Sunday November 20 2011, 10:27 pm:
You can't rush him. Plain and simple. You can tell him over and over again the things he wants to hear, but it still won't make him ready. If you really want to convince him about how bad you want to be with him, than give him the time he needs. Don't push him into being with you, and don't move on to another guy just because he isn't ready to be in a relationship.

BUT, you can also let him get to know you better. A month really isn't a long time to get to know someone. You have to show him that you aren't like most girls. You have to inform him that EVERY couple is different. In order for him to know that thing could go bad, is if he tries. He never knows. Things could be perfect between you too.

I had a guy I use to talk to. I was 15 and he was 19. He said the same thing. Turned out he just didn't want to settle down. He wanted the friends with benefit part, but no strings attached kind of deal. Which wasn't fair to me because of course, I wanted more. I eventually gave up; and I'm glad I did.

Reason why I mentioned that is because you need to figure out if the reaosn why he doesn't want a relationship is because of "the things happening to people" or if he just simply loves the single, no strings attach life.


I also believe that he has been hurt pretty bad in the past by ex girlfriends, or maybe a female figure in his life, or he has trust issues. This may be why he is having a hard time being with you. He may just need time to open up, and feel comfortable around you. Do you even know anything about him, (I'm sure you do, but I mean things a little deeper) like about his past, his ex relationships, ect


I would love to know how things go, and I know if you give him time, he will be with you. Just don't rush it girl! If its meant to be it'll happen (:


Good Luck!

If you need anythign else, please do not heistate to send a message to my inbox!<3

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