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How to tell a friend to get over a guy and move on
A friend of mine constantly changes guys. The thing is, she will only talk to them for a few days and think she is "in love" with them. I try to explain to her that she is not. Currently, she is stuck on a guy from another part of the state and she calls him her boyfriend and says she loves him and cannot go on without him. How can I give her a reality check without checking out of our friendship?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
This is actually really normal. And being her friend, you can't attack her for it. She's trying to figure out what type of guy she wants to spend her life with. If you tell her that she shouldn't date guys that she's "in love with". She's just going to hate you for it. Just stick it out and wait for the phase to end. At the end of this, you'll be closer to her than ever before. Good Luck!
~Mae<3:)
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you should tell her that she is a really special person so she has to be with a guy that really matters
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How old is she?
The reason I ask is because, sometimes-especially during the teenage years, this type of behavior becomes common among girls. It's not too serious, a lot of people grow out of this. (It's probably annoying for you more than anything.) However, if you're concerned that it's not a phase, or you're in your twenties...
You might want to accept that this is a behavior pattern. Is it a pattern of behavior that needs changing? Absolutely. Can you change it? No. When it comes to friends all you can really do is accept them for who they are, love them anyway, and... When their hearts get broken... You let them cry on your shoulder, hold their hand, and help them pick up the pieces. If she asks for your advice, you can give it to her, and she may even listen, but she probably won't follow it. You can't change her, only she can. One day she may want to change and ask for your help, but even then, she must be willing to help herself first.
If you just can't stand listening to her blab on about these guys... There are several things you could do. The first thing is to gently explain to her that you do not want to spend all your time together talking about someone else. This may be hard for her to understand and it may hurt her feelings, so think about what you're going to say to her and how you are going to say it carefully before you have this conversation. Sometimes, distraction can work really well. Don't interrupt, but when you get a chance to do so, change the topic. Or, when the two of you are hanging out, make sure there is some kind of activity for her to focus on.
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The best way to handle it is too tell your friend that you don't want to hear about her crushes anymore. Your friend's business is her business. If you absolutely feel the need to confront her about her habits then you could sit down with her and say " There is something I really wanted to talk about with you, I feel that when it comes to guys you act on impulse and it really concerns me" This is a way to address the situation without coming across as you are attacking her. Your friend may act defensive because it is a subject she feels comfortable to discuss with you and you are expressing your concerns. You could also try and explain to her that it takes a few months to get to know a guy not a few weeks. Your friend could just be the type of person who falls quickly or is quickly attracted to someone. I think you should sit her down and talk it over with her. Express how you feel and express your concerns. If she doesn't listen too you then you could end the conversation with " I understand you are upset and I respect your choices but to avoid arguments in the future I really would not like to talk about crushes." This way you are getting the point across that you don't want to hear it anymore and she won't get overly defensive about it.
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