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telling family to back off nicely
ok so my family dont like me because they think that i will turn out like my mother... who is really bad.... but anyways she aint in our lives... so i ended the emotional abuse b getting up and leaving and now that i just mind my own business the go and accuse me for things they lost and like i stole it... and i just would like to know how to tell them to just back off respectfully and not like them saying im not considered a part of their family no more! it hurts but i dont want them to get hurt with the things i could say!... what do i do and say???
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
What you have in front of you is a cavalcade of LOSERS. Don't hang around with losers! 86 yourself out of their picture so that they don't drag you down with them. I know, emotionally it is tough on women, but for your sake you need to do it.
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you just ask if you can sit down and talk to them or when your not home call them. If you said you didnt steal anythng then you didnt there is not a nice way to tell FAMILY to back off but talkin, making them understand you are not gonna turn out like your mother that is the only solution with family.
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I could give you a better answer if I knew how old you are. Your age does make a difference in how you approach the question you posed. As what and how you say something will be taken somewhat differently based on how old you are and who you are say it too.
In general what you want to say is: Please respect the fact that I am my own person and not my mother or anyone else. I find it hurtful when people compare me to my mother for I try very hard not to be her. If you love me please give me the benefit of the fact that I am me and not someone you think I could be. I am working hard to be my own person and your references to my mother are not helping me.
You need to put what I have said into your own words so that it sounds more like you then me. I believe that what I am saying is respectful; in that you are telling them you are not your mother. You are trying hard not to be her. You are asking for their help so that you do not become your mother. The fact that you end by asking for their help is what I believe makes this more respectful than hateful. As a people we all like to help one another. If you don't respect someone you don't ask for their help. By asking for their help you are showing your respect for them. Respect gains respect.
I hope this helps.
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just tell them that you mean no disrespect but the way that they are treating you is not right you and your mother are two different people, just because your mom did stuff wrong doesnt mean that you did and you should not be punished for her mistakes and if they do not wish for you to be around thats fine but they need to leave you alone if they want you to go... everyone wants to have their family but if yours is treating you this badly, you are better off without them goos luck and best wishes
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