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How to make new friends?
I am an adult, married for 18 years, work full time, and have my own business, and a family which requires the rest of my time during the week. However, there are some Saturday or Sunday afternoons I would like to meet up with friends for coffee, a movie or other outing.
I only have two friends, and they are busy like me, but I try to make time for them, but they don't reciprocate. In fact, one of them is just plain rude about not returning calls and such, I am very irritated. I don't have time to volunteer or join any groups, clubs etc. So in light of this info, how would one make new friends?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
I know how you feel. The world has changed. I heard the average American has 1 confidant. I hate to say it, but bars and taverns are open for drop-in friendship all weekend. Likewise, never a day goes by without 12 AA meetings in almost any town. If you go to a coffee shop 3 out of 4 Saturdays, the staff will start to share personally with you. Are you good at lingering? Any prisoner would be happy to meet with you some Saturdays. The same with a patient in a long-term care facility. If you walk a cute dog, or stand outside a store with one, people will stop to chat. If you wear your keys on one of those rubber stretchy bands, up on your arm by your elbow, the public will assume that you "work here" and will approach you for assistance in stores. That has opened up lots and lots of new acquaintences for me. Have you and your husband considered you hiring an escort for a Saturday outing once or twice? Because it could lead to a wider circle of acquaintences at best, and a funny story at least! In my area, bead shops have weekend drop-in hours. Even if you only pretend to like beading...it's good conversation and you would meet another business owner. Do you belong to local chapters of associations of business women? There must be something for business owners, especially women. Or, Soroptimists, Elks, Rotary, Eages, Women in computing, Chamber. You are not alone; I truly know how you feel. Our culture has basically lost true friendship values. Does your community have independent public radio? Those people are a good crowd, and those stations always have a place for many types of individuals in various roles. It would be great if you could find an activity that you like, in a regular place, and then it's a double-benefit because you like it anyway, and you might make friends. Many people turn to online chat rooms. Talkshoe has free online conference calls for all sorts of things, with chat rooms online with side talk. You local city Craigslist has social categories, not just classifieds. Peruse the Home page for groups, politics, etc... Don't give out personal info because creeps infiltrate, but you might end up meeting some very local people with common interests. It could lead to something. I recently finally decided to try Facebook, and it's been alright.
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How about your coworkers/clients/customers? Get to know them on a more personal level and you might just click with one or two people! My mom has her own business and offers her clients/vendors/customers to take them out to lunch all the time. She's made a few friends that way.
Maybe you can plan a big get together as a thank you for helping your business in even the smallest way.. You could do a BBQ at your house or the park/beach. Have dinner at a restaurant etc. etc.
Or if you want to keep it simple, invite someone you want to get to know better to lunch...on you!
Good luck.
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All you have to do really is go up to someone you don't really know (or don't even know at all), and just talk to them. What about your business? Maybe you could make some friends there. Trust me, talk is sometimes the only thing to make friends.
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