|
CONFUSED!!!!!!!!!!
Okay I'm pregnant with my current boyfriends baby and I have three choices. My first choice is to move in with my sister while he gets a job and we both move in together. My second choice is move in with him and his family. My last choice which is giving me the biggest problems is staying with my mom and my other sister. The problem with that is that me and that sister don't get along and both her and my mom don't want me to be with my boyfriend until he gets a job. I love my boyfriend so much and I don't want to live with my mom and she is trying to force me into staying with her but I don't want to because I wont be able to see him. My question is out of the three which one would sound like the best choice for me right now? (btw I'm 19)
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
Probably with your sister and boyfriend.
His family may be cool but you need people around that you trust and feel safe with.
And if your mother is trying to force you that's obviously not the right place.
]
You're an adult. You can make your own decisions.
The first consideration, though, is what will be the best environment for the baby. Are his parents responsible people? Or are they flakes or worse? If they aren't the most stable people in the world then you should stay home.
Since the boyfriend doesn't have a job moving out with him (you guys getting your own apartment) is not a consideration.
You, your mom and your sister will have to sit down and have a discussion about creating a good atmosphere for raising a child. That means that both you and your sister will have to give up some of your native selfishness. Try to reach a meeting of the minds and then go from there.
Whatever you decide, good luck. Once your boyfriend finds employment either one or both of you should also start going to community college part time. You're going to need education to dig yourselves out of this hole you're in. My folks had me when they were teenagers and they sacrificed mightily to put each other through school and elevate us into the middle class. So you need to make longterm plans like my parents did.
]
Your not going to like my answer; of the three choices the most stable of the three is staying with your mom.
You have not supplied enough information on moving in with your sister. Information to consider this choice that would be needed is; Has she offered to take you in? Is she married? Does she have her own children? does she have room for you? The biggest of these questions is has she offered to take you in.
Some same questions about moving in with his family. Have they offered to take you in? Is he actively looking for work? Will moving in with his family enable him in any way with looking for work or anything else?
I have learned over time answering question such as yours that there are two-sides to every story. Your mom, for whatever her reasons, may have legitimate concerns, concerning your boyfriend. Starting with the fact that he got you pregnant. Contraception is a two-way street. He is just as responsible as you are in this area.
Her reasons aside for the moment, your home sounds to be the more stable environment for you and for the baby when it arrives. I could change my opinion with more information, for now this is what I feel is the best solution for you.
]
I feel like the best place for you to stay is the place where the LEAST stress is! Your pregnant, you have to think about your baby and you can have a miscarriage if your under too much stress! You love your bf and your family, but NO stress is what you need right now. Good luck sweetie! -Christy
]
More Questions: |