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My husband is stubborn
How I can I get along with better
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Stubborn people do not want to be wrong, and they will not back down from an argument. I know because I'm very stubborn too. If you guys are arguing, just don't talk back because it will make the situation worse.
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If that fails, sex always make things better.
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Hi, I'm one of the older adviser on this site. Old enough to be most of the questioners grandfather. Hopefully the wisdom that comes with age and life experiences will be helpful to you.
The advice given by sousou1234567 looked to me to be very good. I would only add that you and your husband consider marriage counseling.
Here is why: You see I too was a very stubborn and controlling husband. It took a life threatening auto accident that has left me disabled to open my eyes and learn something about myself I never saw.
Because of my injuries I suffered a serious depressive episode. While in counseling to deal with this I learned that I have been suffering from depression for longer that I knew. I dealt with my depression by being stubborn and controlling. As I put it as long as everything was in its proper place and in its proper boxes, within my mind, then I could exist and function at the levels I needed to.
Which was great as I lead a very successful career life. Looking back I now wonder how my wife and family was able to live with me. My wife knew there was something wrong. Neither she or our family doctor where able to convince me to see someone about this.
Is your husband depressed, I can't say. Anything is possible. He may just be a stubborn person, which is character flaw you were to blinded by love to see. Hopefully he is not that stubborn in his love for you that the suggestion of seeing a marriage counselor will allow you; to both workout this problem and identify if he may have other problems that may need help.
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Tips on how to deal with a stubborn husband:
1) Examine your interests and prioritize the interests that are most important to you. For example, perhaps you are more concerned about decisions about dealing with children, money, or issues relating to your personal independence. The issues that are most important to you deserve the greatest efforts.
2) Listen carefully when you talk with him, listen closely to what he says. If what he says is not clear, keep asking questions to find out what underlies his approach. When he finishes talking you can say, "I want to make sure I understood you properly. Did you say 'x, y. & z'?" Let him know you are listening, make it clear that you expect him to listen to you. You can say, "I listened to you, now please listen to me."
3) Try to understand his reasons and encourage him to speak honestly (in a non-confrontational manner).
Good luck :]
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Make him think he's right and let him win. If he tells you something really stupid or anything you don't really want to do, just tell him ok and do it your way later or don't do it at all. If he wants to keep arguing, the best thing to do is just walk away for a while. Make up any excuse to get away or do your best to change the subject. I hope this helps and good luck.
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