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still depressed and now it's getting worse
I know that have wrothe about this before but iam still having the issuse. I've had a hard life and it started when I was about the age of 3 I would have been 4 a week later when I was molested by my father and iam 22 now and Iam still having flashbacks and nightmares. I don't remember all of what happend by mom has been telling me about what happenned ever since I turned 7 years old. I don't think my mom should have told me about something like when I was so young and today I blame my mom for my depression and now a few weeks ago I started thinking about suicide. I just feel like it's better for the whole world if I was dead or better yet to never have been born. Ever since I turned the age of 18 I started acting wild and out of control I have had sex with 5 guys and 2 girls since the aga of 18 and iam now only 22 years old. I've also been drinking and smoking weed. One of the guys i've had sex with was when I was drunk and I don't even remember it I found out when he was spreading it around the school and the other kids was calling me a drunk whore and talking about me behind my back. I feel as if I was raped since I was drunk is it to late to report it and plus Iam mentally challenged(mr) How do I get over my depression?
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Hi, I am old enough to be your grandfather and I am hopping that the wisdom that comes with age and some grandfatherly advice will be helpful to you.
Lets take things one question at a time starting with your feeling you were raped:
In the eyes of the law by virtue of the fact that you were drunk and therefore could not give consent you were raped.
To charge someone with rape you must report the rape within the statue of limitations. Generally the statue gives you 5 years to report the rape, so by what you have written here you still have time to do so should you want to.
Next I want to address the molestation by your father. I am ever so sorry that happened to you. Your mother should have sought treatment for you at that time, unfortunately back then it was felt you would forget it happened and have no lingering effects. Here again I apologize we know better know.
There is an organization called RAINN: This stands for Rape, Abuse,Incest National Network. This is a wonderful organization dedicated to helping people like you get their lives back on track. They have a hotline which is operated 24/7 by a group of well trained volunteers who will help you find other RAINN members in your own community to help you find the doctors and other professionals you need to see to start feeling better. These people will be there for you and stay with you as long as you need them. The number is 1-800-656-HOPE. Please call them now, they can and will help you.
As for your feelings of depression and suicidal thoughts. You are depressed that is evident in your writing. Your feeling of worthlessness is part of the depression. The world would not be a better place without you. Yes you have had a hard life, there are people who can help change that, help you make a better life for yourself. It will take some time. In the short term the doctors can help you feel better; you need to give them that opportunity and work with them.
How do I know this? I too suffer from depression, I've battled it for some time without knowing it. With the help of a great doctor and therapist ans some hard work with my therapist I am in a better place today. I know you can be too.
Call the people at RAINN. IF you feel that your going to hurt yourself call for help by calling 911 or go to the nearest hospital emergency room.
Once the fog of depression is lifted you will feel much better about yourself and the world you live in, that I promise you.
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Hey Hon,
Look at it, as a test, make the decision mentally to be the empowered one and not the helpless victim. God has given you this challenge, say I choose to be a empowered, inspiring young lady and not a prisoner of my past..Remember you make your own decisions, you are not a victim...yes you were when you were young, but don't let that to become your identity and be an excus for your entire life. You matter, value yourself, respect yourself, start making healthy decisions. Your past doesnot define you or your future..Choose to live life like a winner...Do not get caught in ruminating, or your emotions...and feeling sorry for yourself...they come and go..what is real is the now...what you have right now...and by not being grateful for being here you let this vicious cycle to kill your soul and your wonderful future. Also, express your anger...express it...say what you want to say to the people in your life no matter how negative, responsibly. Find God, strengthen your belief in him...God loves you no matter what has been done to you and what you have done...remember that.
Also, find something that makes you happy, a passion, love something or someone, most importantly love yourself, find something creative to do, or athletic...dance, running, boxing..drawing...as soon as you feel the emotions come up or the backflashes, choose to do something that empowers you taking a walk, taking a yoga class, reading books, join a group, eat good food and enjoy this beautiful world with all its ups and downs. We are here for a reason..We all have lessons to learn...You are responsible for your life! "I AM NOT A VICTIM"
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1) If there is one person in the whole world who means the most to you, and you know they will always have your back, discuss this with them.
2) Relieve yourself from those flashbacks and think of it as a movie you saw, and that it never happened.
3) Talk to your mom if you wish and tell her what you have been going through, most parents help out in their own ways.
4) Do not commit suicide, because nothing is your fault, and you deserve every right to be happy.
5) If people talk behind your back, so what? Ignore it, that is what I do, and remember, they don't know the real story behind all your problems, and they can go screw themselves.
6) Write down everything that bothers you as a message you would send to someone, and rather send it back to yourself or burn it. If you do happen to send it to yourself, reply in a sort of way that you would help that specific person if you were not in their place. If you burn it, imagine all your flashbacks, fears and problems locked up in that one envelope, sealed shut, and burning to ashes.
7) I hope these help, further more, you could get some counseling to help out, or relieve all your anger and depression in exercise, rest, or specific sports such as karate, gymnastics, swimming, lastly boxing.
I hope it helps
~gamergirlxoxo
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