sillyrob answered Monday April 4 2011, 6:44 pm: Dear best friend,
I am so saddened that you are moving to (place). I am really going to miss all the fun times we had watching movies/hanging out at the mall/sticking fireworks in the neighborhood cats/making fun of poor people, and all the times we talked about hot guys/hot girls/hot transgenders/hot inanimate objects. I hope the move goes well and you don't get hit by a drunk driver/have a tree fall on you/get eaten by a T-Rex/spontaneously combust, because I would really sad/torn up/mad/happy about that. I hope you make lots of friends and hope you stay away from drugs/sex with random people/Mormonism because I don't want to visit you and find out you're high/pregnant with STD's/going on a mission. So I hope you think about me all the time because I'll think of you/never think of you/forget you in a week. Hugs and kisses/punches to the face!
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