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Homemade dinner for first date?
18/f
How would you guys feel if someone offered to cook you dinner in their home for a first date? I think it's awesome but some people seem to think it's a bad plan (ie. too forward for a first date). What kind of message does that send?
Granted this would not be with a complete stranger, I can see that could probably be a bit uncomfortable.
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Personally, if it were me, I would love it if someone offered a home cooked meal. It should, however, be noted that I am grown up and can actually have dinner with a woman without it resulting in sex.
This REALLY depends on the guy in question and how well the two of you know each other. If he knows you well enough to know you aren't "first date slut" material, then this should go off without a hitch.
If, on the other hand, you don't know this guy very well, I wouldn't have him over to your home on a first date. You say he isn't a complete stranger, and that is good, but how well do you really know him? If you know him very well, all well and good... but if you don't, I would have the first date in a public place.
Oh, and one last thought: Make sure you let someone else know about your date. On the off chance that things go badly, you want someone else to check up on you.
Have the person you are using as a life-line call you at a certain time. If things are fine, you can let them know, but if things aren't fine... then they can get you the help you need to get out of a bad situation.
You know... typing this out has really made me sad. I know everyone says this, but the world really was a better place. None of what I wrote here would ever have been something to worry about when I was 18.
In that spirit, I hope that he is a great guy, and you two have a fabulous date where ever you decide to have it.
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Just go with it, because it's cheap and casual. There's no pressure and you can relax a little. As far as sex goes, if you want it then fine, but if they think that's the message and you don't then be straight up with them. You aren't leading them on by making anyone dinner. In fact it's the other way around. an ass of a guy would typically pay for an expensive dinner or a movie in hopes to get something out of it but this is way more low key, but still nice
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This use to be pretty typical and very acceptable. Now, cooking dinner and inviting someone over on a date typically means you'll be showing them around the bedroom, too.
Unfortunately, "Want to come over to my place?" usually indicates the desire to have sex now. If the guy is expecting a nice dinner and a romp in the bed with you and you have no such plans of an after-dinner fun-time then there could be some serious issues arise.
However, you know your guy friend A LOT better than we do.
If you think he'll get the impression that you're going to bed him, and that is not your intentions, then make it clear and be upfront or don't invite him over for dinner just yet.
If you think he'll get no further idea of what you expect (ie: will only think he's coming over for dinner with you. period.) then there's no harm in doing this.
I see absolutely no harm in this if your expectations are equal to his though.
If you choose to make him dinner, don't go all-out romantic since it's your first date. Be casual and comfortable. Maybe even plan to watch a movie you both enjoy together after or go out and see a new flick in the theatre.
So:
The old message when inviting a man over for dinner was:
"I'd like to cook you dinner and get to know you better."
The new message is:
"I'm cooking dinner for you as an excuse to get you over here and have sex with you."
You know your guy. We don't. Go by what you know and communicate, communicate, communicate! If you must, discuss this issue with him, "I was talking to some friends of mine about inviting you over here for a homemade dinner. It seems like a bunch of them think that it'd give you the wrong impression and that you'd expect more than that. Isn't that silly? We're just starting to get to know each other. To me, dinner is just dinner. It's so weird how people make a big deal over nothing, don't you think?"
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This could be a little dangerous for you, and should depend on how well you know the person. If he is a co- worker or class mate you have known for a while it isnprobably okay.
While offering to cook dinner is a very nice gesture and a money saving one at that. A guy your age imay be hearing; "She is hot for me and whants to bed me". If sex on the first date is not in you plan then I would suggest you suggest a movie and a burger or some other safe date.
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to be honest, guys would think: great i got her! but some guys would feel good knowing that you offered yourself to prepare dinner and stuff. don't worry about the message, im sure he is gonna like the offer ;)
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well making dinner sounds a little too much but do watever comforts you,some people can pull this off on the first date but it depends on how the relationship is,i think you should just go to a restraunt and save the time and worrys,go with your gut on this one ! :P
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