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My boyfriend says I blame his daughter for everything
my boyfriends daughter is now sick and my kids are not i also got sick after she was back with us after a few days and he says i blame everything on his daughter why does he say this to me he does it quite often?
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He might be right. I have a step son and I mean I will do anything for him but I can say that I dont love him like I love my kids its just not the same. He has behavioral problems and is out of control and i felt it was his fault even though its the way he was raised by his grandparents. its hard having step kids you just got to try and treat them same and dont ever talk neg. you cant blame her for getting you sick she cant control when she gets sick. gets get sick we confrot them and then we get sick its the way of life.
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Have you considered that he might be right? Sit down in a time of peace and discuss it. And be open to what he has to say. It may hurt, and you may want to get defensive, but he may be right.
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Perhaps he feels guilty about his daughter passing her sickness onto you and feels he needs to defend her as he could possibly think you view her as a problem or he source of stress and upset in the family right now. Or even this is larger than that and he feels his daughter is somehow excluded from everyone else.
Futhermore, it could be a classic case of transference where he feels rejected or outwith the family dynamic and is transferring this to his daughter which he can then, as a father, seek to protect her from whatever negative thing he thinks you feel towards her and therefore to him.
Whatever the case may be you're not going to find out without talking to him. Look at your family picture. Is it possible that you could be harbouring indifference towards his daughter or himself or even, conciously or not, be favouring your kids over his?
Talk to your partner and ask him simply and upfront why he thinks you have some sort of grudge against his daughter. Hes your partner; especially when kids are involved you both need to communicate and do so in an appropriate manner. Being passive aggressive only addds to problems.
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