|
humorist-workshop
Abused, in pain, and depressed.
23/f
I don't even know where to start. I was in an abusive relationship with a man I thought I'd marry, until he hurt me. He stopped me from running away from him by grabbing my throat from behind and tossing me in the opposite direction...so I have whiplash, and maybe a disk problem. Now I wake up every day in severe neck and back pain, and sometimes it's just really difficult to convince myself to keep going.
Don't worry, I'm not suicidal. I'm just severely unmotivated, to the point that I forget to eat, have no appetite, want to do nothing but sleep and cuddle my cat, and feel uncomfortable out of my apartment for more than a couple of hours.
I have a job, and I love my job, but the pain is making it so difficult recently...people depend on me, and I find myself not caring, which is wholly unlike me.
I'm seeing a pain management specialist and I've had procedures done, I'm on pain medication and antidepressants, and I just...I don't know.
Anyone have any words of encouragement? I just...need a kind word or two... :(
Thanks to all who respond.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: General Sex Questions?
Well, your opening statement of "I don't even know where to start"… You did start this post, THAT'S what matters. Good job in telling us what you're going through
Admittedly, the fact that he put his hands on you is wrong. And, especially having grabbed you on your neck. I find that very disturbing. And, you also did suffer pain from it. You I'm sure will and have gotten responses from others telling you to leave him. Yes, I do agree with that. Under no circumstance should a man grab a woman in a harmful matter, EVER! Whether you leave him or now, that’s up to you. We don't fully know your living situation and all. But, I hope you really give some serious that as to what he may be capable of. Your safety should (and, I hope) comes first!
Not eating: that’s not uncommon when depressed. Fully relatable as im diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder. It's obviously important to eat, though. If you have to, DO try to force yourself to eat. Maybe set a timer to remind yourself to. Even if it's something small, that would be beneficial. That hold true with going outside, it would be beneficial. And how you stated its uncomfortable to be outside for more than a couple hours… then maybe just stay out for an hour or so. There's not a set time limit that needs to be met. Do what's best for YOU!
I took note of two specifics of your post: Your cat and your job. The fact that you have two things that are positives in your life are good. When depressed, it's nearly impossible for most people to find anything good or positive in their live's. Focus on those when your feeling depressed. And, I'm meaning to focus on them in the sense to try to remind yourself of the things that you do enjoy in your life and be thankful you DO have things that are good.
What you're going through took some time to get to where it currently is. Please realize that it may also then take some time to get back to a place and state of mind to where you want it to be. Try to believe in yourself and that you CAN do it!
If you feel the need to contact me, please feel free to at any time to message me in my inbox, k?
Respectfully,
Eric
]
The hardest thing about being in a relationship is seeing the person for who they really are. Whether we like or dislike what we see always determines what the outcome will be. The only thing here is that you saw more of yourself and questioning yourself of why you were with someone like this and now feeling that you are not wanted or even emotionally distraught about enjoying things and people in your life because of what this person took away from you. Just remember who you are and the people that add and multiply to your life and embrace it for what it brings you. Don't let what this man did define who you are. Having the courage to leave was a great step and remember that you have done something that many women arent doing right now. Be proud of yourself and remember that there is someone out there whoi will embrace and aapreciate the strong and passionate woman that you are. When you wake up in the morning and look into that mirror be proud of the person who decided to take a stand and not let herself be manipulated or controlled and is ready to live life to the fullest.
]
I would like you to contact an organization called RAINN. This stands for Rape, Abuse, Incest, National Network. They operate a website as well as a 24/7 National Hot Line: 1-800-656-Hope or [Link](Mouse over link to see full location).
This organization have centers that are generally close to you staffed by professionals who can put you in contact with people in your own town who can help you. These people can be Doctors, Nurses, Lawyers even police contacts who will discuss any criminal complain options that may be open for you to bring. From what you wrote it sounds like you have a criminal assault complaint you could bring which would help bring you some closure.
Hopefully you left this man, if not they will help you get away from him. So please call them or contact them over the web, even if you must do so from work.
]
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
cheer up :)
]
There are many of us who have been in abusive relationships of varying degrees, myself included. You need to look at the reality here. You got out of your abusive relationship, you have a job you love and he hasnt totally destroyed you to the point where youre in an inpatient hospital doped up on meds and on constant suicide watch. You have a lot going for you and this man does not deserve to be the reason that youre feeling so down and out.
Things happen life and in the end its about survival. See this as an oppertunity to grow stronger as a person, to prove to no one but yourself that you can put this behind you and find yourself a man that will treat you with the love and respect that you deserve.
Call up some good friends and have a good bonding sesh, get back out there with people you trust and have yourself a good time. You've earned it. Look after yourself because you're worth it.
The only way we can get over our fears is if we face them.
]
More Questions: |