I met a guy on deviant art who was 20 (I'm 13 but I turn 14 on January 7th) and we started talking. I never had my age or name up on my profile. Or how I looked like. So he didn't know how old I was or any of that. He saw my art, though and thought I was so great. He had a fan fiction series he was writing and I suggested he made a Wattpad account for it. So he did. And we chatted on there more. One day I suggested he added a cover to his fan fiction and he said he wasn't too good at making covers so I offered to draw one for him. I finished it within a week (I think). He loved it and even told me I did so well, he kinda wanted to give me virtual kisses because of it. I was kinda shocked and didn't know how to respond at first. Then I replied- "That's cute. *virtual kisses* đŸ˜˜" He did the same. Ever since, we'd been giving each other virtual kisses and I was had been so into him while we were talking as friends so I went along with it. Later on, we got pretty close and I lived it. However, one day I was just looking around at his profile and I saw it. He was 20 effing years old. I didn't know what to do because I was already so into him and thought my age could scare him off. But I ignored it for a while. Months later (and quite recently) he asked me how old I was and my hear freaking SINKED. I freaked out big time and didn't know what to say. I was thinking "Should I tell him my real age?" "What if he never talks to me again?" "What's gonna happen?" Eventually, I freaked out and told him I was 15, thinking it would freak him out a little less (again, I'm 13). His reaction wasn't really good at first but he said he'd wait for me and he thinks I'm turning 18 in 2019 but I'm really turning 18 in 2020. So instead of 3 years, he'd have to wait 5 years for me to turn 18. It's almost been a month since then and I'm in love with this guy. I know how he looks, how he sounds, and everything. He has a YouTube channel as well but anyways yeah. We've been texting on Kik for awhile now. But idk what to do, PLEASE HELP. WE'VE BEEN FLIRTING A LOT AND WE ARE SUPPOSED TO MEET EACH OTHER ONE DAY. IM SCARED HOW HE'LL REACT AND THAT HE'LL STOP TALKING TO ME!!! HELP!!!!!
I don't even CARE if he doesn't want a relationship. Just having him still talk to me will be enough.
Your best bet is to tell him your real age. I'm sure you know that if you don't, that's something that will you'll always be thinking about. You can't control how he reacts. He may be ok with it, and, he may not be. At the very least, you'll at least have told him the truth
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My mom was an active alcoholic for years and it ruined a lot of my childhood - especially high school. It was hard to watch and difficult to deal with an addict. The good news is, she's been sober for 4 years.
I'm really proud of her and am so happy, but now I'm 21. I want to have a drink now and then or just have some alcoholic beverage laying around for if I feel like drinking, but I'm so terrified to keep alcohol in the house.
How do I continue the occasional drink at 21 without making her feel bad or go down the wrong path again?
It may be best to not have it in the house at all. Also (I assume your her biological daughter and not adopted), alcoholism is heredity. I'm sure you know that already. Please make sure you watch out for yourself and that you don't notice a similar path of your own. I say this because I had a major alcohol and drug problem. I have been completely sober though for just over eighteen and a half years now
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23/f
I don't even know where to start. I was in an abusive relationship with a man I thought I'd marry, until he hurt me. He stopped me from running away from him by grabbing my throat from behind and tossing me in the opposite direction...so I have whiplash, and maybe a disk problem. Now I wake up every day in severe neck and back pain, and sometimes it's just really difficult to convince myself to keep going.
Don't worry, I'm not suicidal. I'm just severely unmotivated, to the point that I forget to eat, have no appetite, want to do nothing but sleep and cuddle my cat, and feel uncomfortable out of my apartment for more than a couple of hours.
I have a job, and I love my job, but the pain is making it so difficult recently...people depend on me, and I find myself not caring, which is wholly unlike me.
I'm seeing a pain management specialist and I've had procedures done, I'm on pain medication and antidepressants, and I just...I don't know.
Anyone have any words of encouragement? I just...need a kind word or two... :(
Thanks to all who respond.
Well, your opening statement of "I don't even know where to start"… You did start this post, THAT'S what matters. Good job in telling us what you're going through
Admittedly, the fact that he put his hands on you is wrong. And, especially having grabbed you on your neck. I find that very disturbing. And, you also did suffer pain from it. You I'm sure will and have gotten responses from others telling you to leave him. Yes, I do agree with that. Under no circumstance should a man grab a woman in a harmful matter, EVER! Whether you leave him or now, that’s up to you. We don't fully know your living situation and all. But, I hope you really give some serious that as to what he may be capable of. Your safety should (and, I hope) comes first!
Not eating: that’s not uncommon when depressed. Fully relatable as im diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder. It's obviously important to eat, though. If you have to, DO try to force yourself to eat. Maybe set a timer to remind yourself to. Even if it's something small, that would be beneficial. That hold true with going outside, it would be beneficial. And how you stated its uncomfortable to be outside for more than a couple hours… then maybe just stay out for an hour or so. There's not a set time limit that needs to be met. Do what's best for YOU!
I took note of two specifics of your post: Your cat and your job. The fact that you have two things that are positives in your life are good. When depressed, it's nearly impossible for most people to find anything good or positive in their live's. Focus on those when your feeling depressed. And, I'm meaning to focus on them in the sense to try to remind yourself of the things that you do enjoy in your life and be thankful you DO have things that are good.
What you're going through took some time to get to where it currently is. Please realize that it may also then take some time to get back to a place and state of mind to where you want it to be. Try to believe in yourself and that you CAN do it!
If you feel the need to contact me, please feel free to at any time to message me in my inbox, k?
Respectfully,
Eric
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When people self harm, how do they do it? Scissors, knife? I just don't understand. And why? I literally do not understand. I have no opinion about it because I don't understand. Any advice appreciated.
Hi,
I used to cut myself years ago with a knife. I didn't do it frequently, but when I was extremely depressed I would on occasion. The reason is that most (I believe) people cut themselves to take away from mental pain they currently may be feeling. When you cut, you see the blood and you physically feel the pain of the cut. The physical pain you feel then temporarily takes some of the mental pain away. its an outlet in a sense. I haven't done it in 20 years, and never will again.....
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I have to say that a person who claims God is REAL is not in touch with God, why? God and all religion is based upon faith, the unknown and unknowable, the complete and total ineffibility of God, that God is both unknown and unknowable. Even Jew claim no right of knowing who or what God is. Jesus was a damn good prophet, a genuine Child of God, but not God incarnate, Jesus Did not claim Equality with God, St. Paul states that fact. It is all about faith. And I still think that the World is going to end before December 31st, 2012, why? Why stated the year in specualation, and now the traditional center for the world's destruction is errupting (September 14th, 2012) The us is the Great Satan once more, and radical muslim extremists are on the verge of starting that which we have feared since 1979, Iran's Nuclear development and the fact that there are more radical muslim extremists in the world than there are resonably sane people. God? God only laughs at the folly of mankind.
God IS real. I'm not going to sit here and try to convince you of my evidence. You may think that that's because I can't give you evidence, but, believe me, I can. It appears though that you've already made up your mind that He is not real, no matter what I'd say to attempt to convince you otherwise. The concern I have, in an honestly good way, is that on judgment day, the people that did not believe in Him, will then find out they were wrong all along. But, then it will be too late. Please realize I'm not here bashing your opinion or trying to start a debate. Rather, all I'm doing is RECOMMENDING to look into the possibility that you may not be right
I want to add this, which I think is important:
There are ONLY 2 POSSIBLE OUTCOMES UPON DEATH.....
1) If YOU are right, then when we pass away, were just "gone" out of existence, period. As if we never were anything. But,
2) If I'M right, we either go to Heaven or hell.....
Please at least give this some thought
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today one friend saw that i habe a bandaid on my hand and asked me if i selfharm or something and i totally paniced,i made some lame excuse and i really hope she bought it,what the hell is so wrong with me,i felt so exposed when she saw it,like it was the end of something,and dont tell me that cutting is wrong,i know that,but it helps me and believe me i dont have anyone who i can tell,noone would understand
Been there, done the cutting myself. In regards to you stating it "helps," I get that. But, please realize there are other healthy outlets. You may have difficult times in life, as we all do, but try to not turn to physically hurting yourself in any way, shape, or form. What the cutting (probably) does for you, and how view it:
1. you have intense/extreme emotional pain
2. you don't have many ways to get that pain out of you, be it in words on paper, doing something healthy, or talking about it to someone
3. having no outlet in turns adds to the current pain your in
4. you have an over-whelming sensation to do something to rid yourself of the pain
5. you then cut yourself
6. this cutting then "releases" your internal pain. You are then able to shift your mind to THE PHYSICAL PAIN you now feel, and you can now visually "see" the pain (blood) releasing out of your body from the cutting
7. This shifting FROM your mental pain, to your now PHYSICAL pain helps your mind focus less on the mental pain. But, this is only temporary
8. you now feel even worse because the mental pain returns soon after the cutting, and now you have added to that pain because you probably feel ashamed/mad at yourself for physically cutting yourself
PLEASE realize im assuming your thought process above. I don't know you, but I have a feeling this is fairly accurate as to what you may think. again, ive been there.
I state that I believe this is how you probably think due to the fact that I've been told directly by a professional psychologist that I have an "Extremely high level of emotional intelligence." In simplest terms, this means that its very easy for me to express, understand, empathize, communicate, feel, convey, etc what I feel and what OTHER PEOPLE feel. I am NOT a doctor, by any means, but ive worked hard for many years at reframing my thought process, and have been very successful at it
Lastly, I do want to directly address the last sentence of your post: the fact that you believe no-one would understand and that you have nobody you can tell..... I imagine that statement you wrote is NOT correct. Im a total stranger, and I do understand. Your family and friends may surprise you, in that they may understand more than you give them credit for. I recommend having the courage to tell them, and you may get a result (in a good way) that you're not expecting. im more than happy to continue to help you, if youd like.....
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My cousin broke up with this guy and he was very controlling and he cheated on her with his ex girlfriend. He didn't like for her to have family over their apartment and he didn't like for her to hang around her very close friends. He has been abusive to her multiple times, one of the times he stalked her to a grocery store and hit her and stole her purse, she had witnesses but she never pressed charges, she got back with him. he choked her & hit her and broke the window out of her apartment and trashed it. She called the police and pressed charges, then dropped them.He has stalked her numerous times and hit her while she was places with friends. He verbally abused her and she already has low self esteem. I'm afraid he wll hurt her badly. He has stolen her phone and he texted my grandmother yesterday, he said : "Where are you? Do be scared." And he told her he would kill her if she had no witnesses and get her fired. He told her he knows where all of her family lives. And yesterday he broke into her apartment for the 50th time. He punched through the glass and came through the window. MY cousin thinks he does drugs cause she said when she was with him, he came home acting different and crazy and his brother does drugs.She put a restraining order on him again and pressed, but he still threatens her. He knows where she lives. I guess he doesn't care about restraining order. What can she do to get him to stop threatening her?
What your cousin has to do is be consistent. GO TO THE POLICE ASAP! nobody should have to live in fear for their lives or their family members lives. Also, I highly recommend her NOT being alone. I cant stress that enough. This guy/ex-boyfriend of hers sounds as if he's capable of what he said he may do. I don't know him, but, when threats like that are made, don't take any chances. Press charges against him if possible. This guy should be behind bars!
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